Made in the Shades
by SexyLexiCullen
Summary: *1955* Edward, a typical American youth of the fabulous fifties is the new kid in town. Romance/comedy/slight drama - a coming of age story with eventual E/B. AH. OOC. Rated M. EPOV
1. The Not So Lone Ranger

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. **

**Chapters are shorter than my norm***

**Summary: Edward, typical American youth of the fabulous fifties being ruled by his hormones, moves to a new town. Change isn't easy, especially since he befriends the geeky Jasper. Romance/comedy/a coming of age story with ****eventual**** canon couples. **

**.**Depending on the review response, I might post chapter two later on. ****

**.**

**.Beta'd by HollettLA**

_Persons attempting to find a plot will be shot_ —Mark Twain.

"**Made in the Shades"**

**by**

**SexyLexiCullen**

"Edward!" My mother called out to me from across the yard. "Be careful with the china."

"Yeah, yeah…" I grumbled, placing the box delicately on the grass, just as the huge bearded, burly man—with a cigar hanging from his mouth—slammed another into my chest. "Thanks." Giving the lazy bastard a smile, I repeated what I just did with the china.

"Edward!" my father shouted. "What are you doing?"

Widening my arms, I wondered what he meant.

"Bring the boxes _into_ the house!" he replied, slamming the screen door behind him.

Waving Carlisle and Esme on—my parents—I picked up the fragile box. While I bent over, I saw the hedges on the side of the house move, and then I heard a giggle—it was a girl giggle—like someone was watching me.

Shaking it off, I started to walk the box into the house. Just as I approached the door, my little brother Jared came barreling down the steps, wearing his Captain Midnight cape.

"Aren't you excited, Edward?" He bounced around, blocking my entrance to our new kitchen.

"No." I scoffed, walking around him.

"Aww, come on…Edward," he whined, pulling on my cardigan sweater.

"Jare, quit!" I pulled away from him and lost my footing, which made my mother's prized dinner plates start to come crashing down onto the floor.

Luckily, my father saw the impending catastrophe and intercepted, catching the box. "Honestly, Edward…" He gave me a look—a glare of distain—or what I'm used to, disappointment.

"It was my fault, Pop," Jared said.

And as soon as Dad left us alone, my twelve-year-old brother began to annoy the shit out of me again. "What?" I asked.

"We're in a new neighborhood." He still looked happy and excited, and I still wore my frown.

"You know what happens in a new neighborhood?" I raised a brow.

He licked his lips, waiting patiently for my reply.

My younger brother thinks I'm so cool. I'm seventeen. I listen to rock 'n' roll music and wear semi-decent clothes. These days you're either a square or a greaser, and I am neither one. I'm not great at school, and I didn't have many friends in Seattle. And something tells me that I won't here in Forks either. Yet, Jared thinks I'm the cat's pajamas.

My father calls me a dreamer, says I have no verbal filter because I'm stuck in La La Land all the time, and I basically need to get my head out of my ass. I have a vivid imagination. But if people knew what I was really thinking, then I'd just be a pervert on top of it all. My mother doesn't approve of my future aspirations as a writer. She says writers starve, and as per the both of them, _"I don't care if you go to bird grooming school. You better get into some kind of college."_ So, I'm looking to dive into my school work, and I hope I can work on my image as well - meaning: I hoped to gain one.

"What happens?"

I chuckled. "You get your ass kicked."

He gulped, righting his cape.

"Come on, Peanut." Grabbing his shoulder, I ushered him out of our new dwelling to empty the last moving truck.

When we approached the truck, I saw a kid my age coming toward us. Quickly, I started to unload our belongings to look busy. I didn't want any trouble.

This guy didn't care if I was busy. "You're the Cullens, right?" He had blond hair, which was kind of wayward, like the mess on my head, only longer. He was about my height and had a friendly disposition about him, as well as a tall lanky frame like mine. He wore a sweater vest, so I wondered if he was a square.

"Yeah." I nodded, placing my hands into my pockets.

"Jasper!" Some girl shouted, coming out from the bushes.

"Are you Jasper?" I asked him, because the blonde nightmare coming toward us was freaking me out.

"I live down the block." He jerked a thumb. "My name's Jasper Whitlock…Hi…but everyone just calls me Jazz."

Smiling, I stuck my hand out. "I'm Edward…um, everyone calls me Edward."

"I'm Tanya!" She grabbed my hand instead of Jasper. She was a bit on the chubby side, but now that she was up close, I noticed she had a pretty face—and a mouthful of metal. "You're Edward!" I had no idea why she kept screaming. "I'm a mess—"

I looked down to the grass stains on her pink poodle skirt. "Um…hiding in hedges will do that." For some reason, I hated that she was so happy.

"You totally caught me! So, we're neighbors. Yay! Which room is yours? I can see into the side room from my bedroom!" she laughed.

With wide eyes, I nodded. "Uh…Wow…thank you for telling me." I pointed dumbly back to the house. "No…I have the front room…overlooks the lawn." I turned to give Jared a glare, silently communicating in that sibling way. If he doesn't switch with me, I will be forced to kill him. Unless, Miss Tanya wants to watch me habitually masturbate.

That could be interesting.

_Mind out of the gutter, Cullen._

I liked her bobby socks with the lace and her Mary Janes.

Briefly, I wondered what they'd look like on my shoulders, next to my ears…

"Oh…that's too bad." She snapped her fingers.

Swallowing, I nodded. "Clearly." I licked my lips and tried to pry my hand out of hers.

"Your hands are soft," she said.

"Um…" I couldn't tell her that sometimes I use my mother's cold cream to jack my dick. "Thank you?"

"You are SO welcome!" She jumped.

And I hopped back. "…the fuck." I breathed, making eye contact with Jasper.

"T, relax," Jasper said. "He's not going anywhere." He slowly grasped her shoulders and pulled her away from me.

"I'm sorry." She winced, and I saw she had something stuck in her braces. "You're going to Forks High, right?"

I nodded. "I start tomorrow." My hands reentered my pockets.

"My mom drives me. We can drive you—Do you have a car…uh…if you do—"

"Hi, Mrs. Denali!" Jasper waved to no one.

"Oh, shoot!" Tanya craned to see over the shrubbery that separates our houses. "I'm grounded—I wasn't supposed to be—bye, Edward!" She threw herself at me and hugged me tight.

I stood there mortified, but she was a girl and my dick was already hard at bobby socks.

"Whoa…what's in your pocket?" She looked down between us.

"My cock."

"What?" She shrieked.

"A clock!" I palmed my face. "What did you think I said? I have a pocket watch?"

"Must be huge!" She stared.

I smirked. "You have no idea." I winked.

"Wow," she sighed, and then looked behind me. "That's your little brother? Hi, Edward's little brother!" She waved.

Jared waved back, frowning.

And then she ran away. "I'll see you tomorrow? It'll be the mostest!"

As soon as she was gone, I turned to Jasper. "What was that?"

We shook hands.

Jasper laughed. "Do you really have a pocket watch?"

I laughed too. "No."

"Peanut!" my mother shouted for my brother.

"Coming!" Jared waved to Jasper, and then ran toward the house.

"Come on." Jasper hit my arm. "I'll show you around the neighborhood."

"Um…" Taking a look around myself, I decided my parents wouldn't miss me. "All right," I agreed, and we left my yard to walk along the streets.

"And_ that_ was Tanya Denali—the bane of my existence—maybe not anymore. You shouldn't have winked at her, or…do you like her?"

"No," I said. "But, like…" I looked away from him. I'm always horny, and she's a girl.

"I hear she's very friendly. I'd never…you know, hang out with her. Then I'd never get rid of her. She's young, too."

"Duly noted." I nodded. "But is she always that happy? For a second there, I wanted to stab myself."

"Jesus!" he hissed.

I shrugged. "Yeah…it's all this rain..." I trailed off.

"My mother says your father's a doctor? He's the new Chief of…something. And you moved from…?" Jasper turned, pointing to me.

"Seattle," I said, kicking a rock across the street.

"Seattle! Boy, I'd love to live there. The chicks must me amazing."

"Amazing," I lied, widening my eyes. "Listen, thanks for coming along."

"Don't mention it," he laughed.

"Well…I'm glad. I thought a new neighborhood might be trouble." My hands went back into my pockets after my confession.

"What do you mean?" Jasper stopped us from walking.

Scratching the back of my neck, I took a look up and down the road. "Being the new kid…I thought someone might be…inclined to kick my ass." I chuckled nervously.

He laughed at me, throwing his head back. "Never happen—not with me as your pal." He pointed to himself, leaning toward me. "Just stick with me."

For the first time since I woke up this morning, I wore a smile. Jasper showed me around. The town isn't very populated, but my parents chose a house close to Main Street, where everything is. Jasper just called it "town", like this "town" that we were going to was some hip place.

He showed me the hardware store, the diner, the drug store which is also the soda shop, and Swan's Garage. There really wasn't much to this "town". Apparently, you have to travel to a place called Port Angeles to have access to the drive-in, the regular cinema, and shopping.

Fleetingly, I hoped my father would budge and buy me a car. He lets me use his on occasion, but I'd get around a lot better with a set of wheels. Carlisle refuses unless my grades go up, so until then I'll be bumming rides and using my feet as transportation.

As we were walking away from the mechanic's shop, I spotted a girl. She wore a dark blue jumpsuit and was pumping gas. I could tell right away that she worked here and didn't own the vehicle. She wasn't only cute. She was gorgeous—brown hair pulled back into a low ponytail that lay to the side on her shoulder. She had dark eyes, long lashes—a face like Natalie Wood—and a great body. The coveralls didn't mask those curves at all, and the red scarf that was tied around her neck was a contrast and stuck out from the rest of her ensemble.

"Who's that?" I whispered, stopping again.

"That's Isabella Swan."

"Isabella." I smiled, sounding out her name and liking it on my lips.

"You only call her that if you want a pounding. She's tough—goes by Bella."

"Bella," I said this time.

Jasper slapped my chest. "Rule number one, you don't go near The Swan."

"Why not?" I asked, leaning my forearm against the brick of the building while my eyes never left her. Something inside me willed her to look my way, yet she never did.

After taking the money from the patron, she skipped back into the building.

"Because she's Emmett Swan's little sister—"

Jazz paused his words when a huge guy came into view. He wore a uniform like Bella—and he was just massive, dark hair and menacing eyes. His hair was also slicked back.

"That's Emmett," Jasper whispered.

"Why are you whispering?" I chuckled.

He gulped and his eyes widened while he stared behind me. "Can I help you?"

Turning around, I came face-to-face with Emmett.

"Hey, Emmett!" Jasper waved. "This is Edward Cullen. He's new here."

"Em?" Bella came back out, only now she was wearing a black leather jacket and a matching beret. "Hey," she said, looking from me to Jazz.

I smiled, lifting my hand in greeting.

"Everything okay?" She was staring at me now.

"These yo-yos were just taking off." Emmett jerked his head to us.

"Okay." Her cheeks became flushed, and then the loud roar of a motorcycle caught all our attentions. "See ya!" She waved, hopped up to give Emmett a smooch on his cheek, and then skipped over to the dude on the motorcycle.

"I'm picking up Rosie at seven—be ready!" Emmett shouted out to his sister.

She nodded, staring right at me while she snaked her arm around the guy's middle. Bella continued to stare, as did I, and when she rolled her eyes to her brother and gestured to the guy on the bike, I found myself laughing.

"What's funny?" Emmett asked.

I composed myself and Bella took off. "No-nothing."

"You guys just peepin' at my sister or are you going to buy something?"

At Jasper's insistence, I bought a map of Forks and some chewing gum.

"Whew…that was close." Jazz was still staring at Swan's Garage while walking backward.

"I thought you said you carried a lot of weight around here?" I asked.

"I lied!" He looked upset. "Sorry…you're new, so…"

"I get it," I admitted, now knowing he was just an ordinary dork like me. "Who was the guy on the bike?"

"Their cousin. His name is Paul—he and few others make up Emmett's gang."

"His gang?"

"You'll see when we get to school. They're greasers—Rosalie and Alice are squares, but they're property of Emmett and—"

"Who?" I asked.

He patted my back. "Rosalie Hale. She's the most beautiful chick at Forks High. You'll know her when you see her."

"Does…Bella's dad own the garage or something?"

"No, yes, sort of," he said. "It's just in their family. Charlie—the chief of police—his brother owned the garage until he died last year. He was hit by a beer truck out on the 101 when he was rigging a Chevy up to the tow-truck."

"Whoa…and that's…Paul's father?" I inquired.

"Why so curious?" He stopped again.

I shrugged.

"Well, the garage and Paul are Charlie's now. People run it during school hours and then the three kids do after. We're a small town, so…if you ever have car trouble, that's the place to go."

"Right." I frowned, wishing I had a reason to go back to Swan's.

"Hey…Bella's off limits. Any guy who tries gets his slacks kicked in."

"Oh, I wasn't—"

"Yeah, you were…" He grinned at me. "It's okay…I follow Alice around like a lost dog, and she's with Paul."

"If their dad is like…top cop, how are Emmett and them in a gang?"

He rolled his eyes. "They're bullies who wear the right clothes and ride around on bikes…They don't do anything bad besides terrorize guys like us."

This time I gulped.

"But if you play it cool, you'll be all right."

I saw my house coming up in the distance.

"I'll meet you here at eight?" he asked. "My buddy Jake usually gives me a ride. He won't mind. We'll walk over to his place together."

"Oh, wow…thank you!" My hands gripped Jazz's biceps because the alternative would be my mother taking me to school.

"You'll like Jake."

"Okay." I nodded.

"He's a senior, like I am, um…" He pointed to me, waiting.

"I'm a senior, too. Hey, is Bella a—"

"Get her out of your head, man!" He turned serious. "You have a better shot going for Rosalie. They're on-again, off-again with the changing of the seasons."

I didn't reply.

"Bella's a junior anyway," he finished.

"Oh…" I rocked back on my heels.

"See ya!" He waved, and I watched him speedily walk down the street.

By now no boxes littered the front lawn and the moving truck had left. So, I quietly made my way up to my bedroom to unpack.

"You owe me big time," Jared said.

I paused, with the last box I had to move into my "new" room in my hands. Tanya was already staring so hard, Jared felt compelled to draw his curtains. "Where are your binoculars?"

"In my spy box!" His eyes widened.

"Keep 'em handy. And if you see tits, come get me." I walked down the hall.

**Thank you for reading. **

**I hope you guys enjoyed that and will continue reading. **

**This is a ficlet and its written, so updates will be fairly regular. All of it is not beta'd yet, so I can't commit to updating daily just yet. Please leave me your thoughts. I'd love to know what you think. **

**Also: I've read fics where the teens act like they're 25... In this story, Edward is 17, and so he will act like he's 17. In my experience, as the years roll by teens get more mature. So, don't hold it against Edward for being a bit on the immature side. The innocence of the time period will show in this. **

**I state "eventual canon couples" which means Edward may not be hooking up with anyone...any time soon. Hold on kiddies! This is a coming of age story. Edward will learn a lot during the course of his senior year at Forks. It's mostly comedy, and even the dramatic elements later on will have you laughing your bobby socks off. **

**Depending on the review response, I might post chapter two later on. **


	2. Asshole

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA**

_Persons attempting to find a moral will be banished —Mark Twain._

"**Made in the Shades"**

**Chapter Two: Asshole**

_. . . Physically strong, mentally awake, and morally crooked._

Dressed in my best dark blue flannel shirt, my nicest pair of_—_Levi's 501—jeans, my new black suede creepers, and my grey wool jacket_, _I ran down to the kitchen for breakfast.

Mom was busy serving Jared, while Dad read the paper.

"Morning," I called.

My mother greeted me with a smile, but my father never looked up.

A bowl of oatmeal and a glass of orange juice were already set out for me, and so I hurriedly ate.

"Take this off." Mom took Jared's cape off of his shoulders. "Finish up. You have to go dress properly."

Jared frowned.

"Edward…" Mom smiled at me, folding the cape in her hands. "I know being at a new school, practically in the middle of your senior year, will be difficult."

"It's only November," I said.

My brother laughed. "He's afraid people are going to beat the crap out of him—"

"Jared, such language!" Mom.

"Don't talk to your mother like that." Dad.

"What's important is that you mingle," Mom said to me. "The both of you—I hope you mingle with the other students. That Tanya from next door seems like a lovely girl…"

Dad's paper came down. "She seems a little—" he stared at me. "Don't take advantage of that girl."

I gasped. "Me?"

He narrowed his eyes at me. "Yeah, you, Edward." The paper came back up. "Just be prepared to buckle down, young man." Dad gave me a stern look from _over_ the paper. "I don't care what college…but you better get into one."

I ignored him and turned back to my mother.

"The first day at a new school is very important," she sang.

"Right, Mom…Mingle." I looked to Jared. "Mingle, Peanut." I nodded, squeezing his hand.

My brother gave me a smile, and then ran from the table to get dressed. I honestly didn't have much of an appetite anymore. "I'm going to take off."

"Have a great day!" Mom kissed my cheek.

"Dad…" I stood up, expecting him to say…something.

"Pay attention." He waved, not looking from the paper. "And stay away from that girl. I don't care what she offers you."

"Carlisle!" My mother chastised. "My Edward would never."

He laughed at my mother.

_Yeah, he knows me—or my desperation. _

Sighing, I left the kitchen, grabbed my notebook and a few pencils, and met Jasper outside. He was waiting for me by the curb. I didn't see Tanya, which was a plus—keep me out of temptation's way and all . . . Kidding.

_I'm not that desperate. _

Yet…

Yesterday, when Jasper suggested I meet him at eight, I didn't ask him why. First period supposedly starts at 8:50, and the school is just down the road—a mile or two—or a fifteen-minute walk, and he said his friend was driving us.

It turns out that Jake lives a bit further away from both our houses and the school. We walked about a mile and entered a pretty shitty looking part of town. There were trailers and stray dogs and pads that weren't great looking.

Jasper explained that Jake works at Swan's Garage. And so, getting a ride with him will make us cool by association. Jasper and Jake have been friends since kindergarten.

"This is where Jake lives," Jazz said.

We ran up the porch.

"His old man's in jail—lives with his mother and sister." Jasper called me over to a window with his finger. "That's Becky. She works at the diner," he whispered, and we were able to see her putting on her hose. Becky's back was turned to us but I could see that she had short curly black hair, a curvaceous body, and didn't care much for curtains.

"Wow…" My blood started to pool down below, and I adjusted myself. Her legs were so long, and she sat in only a brassiere and panties.

"You guys ready?" Jake came out of the house. He was very big—a few inches shorter than my six-foot-three thin frame, but he was bulky.

I became nervous, wondering if the guys of Forks had some weird affliction when it came to their sisters.

"Jake, this is Edward Cullen. He's new."

He nodded in greeting. "Lay a buck on me, and you can come around and watch my sister take a bath."

Jasper hit my arm. "He's got a hole drilled into the bathroom. Every Thursday night, right, Jake?"

Jake nodded, entering his car.

Despite where Jake lived, his 1950 Dodge Diplomat was pristine and goosed up, even if it's a few years old. Jasper and Jake spoke about Alice and Rosalie the whole way. It seemed that Alice was all Jasper ever talked about, but I got it. If Rosalie and Alice were as good-looking as Bella, I could understand. As per Jazz, Rosalie and Alice are even more attractive—womanlier, in his words.

Also, Jasper said I missed one helluva Halloween bash last week. It was Rosalie's party, and it would have helped me socially fit in. "It was, like crazy, man." Jazz shook his head.

"Too bad, I missed it."

"There'll be other parties," Jake said, sounding bored. "It really wasn't that hip."

When we pulled into a spot, Jake was quick to leave the car, acting like he didn't know us. He didn't even say goodbye.

"Hi, Edward!" Tanya hopped out from behind a car.

I jumped back and almost knocked Jasper over. "Hi," I said.

"How many times have I told you not to do that?" Jasper nearly shouted.

"Oh…" Her face finally fell, and she stared at me expectantly. "I'm sorry." She smoothed down her skirt. It was purple today. "Good luck today, Edward," she whispered.

I grinned. "Thank you, Tanya."

She sighed, like swooning or something.

"Let's go." Jasper yanked on my sleeve, and we entered the school.

Tanya followed us, but didn't say anything. She eventually scampered off, and Jasper said we wouldn't see _much_ of her. She's a freshman, an ankle biter, which made me feel horrible for checking her out yesterday.

Since this move had been planned months in advance, I had my schedule. I was all set for my first day. After Jasper checked out my class card, he commented that we have Latin third period with Rosalie and Alice.

We have gym together seventh period and the same lunchtime during sixth.

We walked to Jasper's locker first, and then to mine, which was down the hall. The whole time, my eyes scanned the area.

Girls prattled excitedly, equipped with their poodle skirts, jumpers, cardigans, and saddle shoes. There were three types of guys here: the squares, the jocks wearing letterman jackets—and the greasers, which only consisted of Emmett and his posse.

When Emmett walked by, I raised my hand to wave. "Hi…" I was going for nice, but I just ended up looking like an ass. He ignored me.

"Don't bring attention to yourself." Jasper chastised. "This is school. Maybe he was decent yesterday, one-on-one, but today is different." He was right.

Today Emmett laughed and goofed around with about five other guys wearing leather jackets.

Bella caught my attention—carrying her books, wearing the same leather as yesterday—as she trailed behind her brother. Unlike yesterday, she wore a long black, fitted pencil skirt that hugged her curves—nothing like the flaring skirts the other girls wore—and on her feet she wore flats with white bobby socks.

_I love those little socks. . ._

My breath caught when she turned to me and lifted her hand—that's all she did. She turned around just as fast, and then she was gone. "She just waved at me." I squeezed Jasper's arm.

He smacked my chest. "There's Rosalie…"

I turned and my jaw hit the floor. Rosalie wasn't a girl. The only way to describe her would be woman—she was all woman. She had the voluptuous body of a pin-up model, blonde hair like Marilyn, full red lips, the bluest eyes I had ever seen, and a pretty face. She carried herself like a grown-up with the brown pleated skirt, plaid blazer, and brown saddle shoes.

Speaking of Marilyn, Edward Cullen usually prefers brunettes, but now I knew why _Gentlemen Prefer Blondes_.

She was everything. She was the kind of woman I jacked it to at night—the kind of woman whose picture would be in a calendar.

Time slowed by the grace of God, and I was able to drink in everything about her.

As she sauntered by us, she briefly looked me up and down while smirking.

"She's rich, beautiful, and one of the stars of my wet dreams…" Jasper sighed, saying all that in barely a whisper.

Then suddenly, time sped up and she had passed us.

"There's Alice!" Jasper hit me again. "Me and Alice have a little something going on…" He turned back to the dark-haired girl that—to me—didn't look like anything special. She seemed average, wearing what all the other girls did, flaring skirt and a white polo-tee. She was tiny, but had a pretty face and a decent body. "Hey, Alice!" Jasper waved.

Her head whipped to him, and then she gave him the middle finger. "Get lost, creep."

Still, my pal was not deterred and continued to smile. "I'd never kick either one of them out of bed." He turned to me. "I think you made an impression on Rosalie, though."

"You think?" I took off my jacket to place it in my locker.

He nodded. "I'm sticking with you. If you can get Rosalie's attention…" He chuckled, trailing off.

I smiled so wide while he walked me to English class. Rosalie—the most beautiful girl in school—noticed me.

On top of the world, I went to the seat my teacher pointed to in a daze. Eventually, I snapped out of it, noticing that I was sitting next to none other than, Bella Swan.

Then I thought, "Didn't Jazz say she was a junior?" Not thinking hard on it, I sat quietly and started to doodle in my notebook, until the teacher called me up to the front of the room.

"Class…" Mr. Banner started. "We have a new student. Edward, come up here, please."

Clearing my throat, while ten shades of nervous, I walked up to the front.

"Edward…tell us a little bit about yourself."

"Yeah, Ed-nerd…" Some greaser chuckled, making a few others laugh at my expense as well.

"Cool it, Jimmy." Bella spat back to him.

"Mr. Hunter, Miss Swan, please." Mr. Banner gestured for me to continue.

"Sorry I'm late…" Rosalie swayed her hips as she entered the room, and my eyes followed her ass.

"Miss Hale, do you have a slip?"

"Emmett's tongue was the only thing slippin'." That Jimmy guy slapped hands with a guy next to him.

"Mr. Hunter!" Mr. Banner shouted again. "Edward, please continue…Rosalie, I'd like to see you after class."

Rosalie grinned at me as she took her seat, which was—no lie—right behind mine. It made me grin too.

"Um…" I rocked back on my heels. "My family and I moved in over the weekend," I whispered.

"A little louder," Mr. Banner said.

After repeating myself, I added, "We moved from Seattle because my father is the new Chief of Surgery at Forks General Hospital." I shrugged, hoping that was it.

"Any hobbies?"

I faced my teacher. "I played baseball, but…that's it."

"Jerking off isn't a hobby?" Jimmy shouted up to me.

"Enough!" Mr. Banner shouted. "One more outburst, and I'll give you a detention. . ." He looked back to me. "You can take a seat."

Faster than I thought possible, I ran and threw myself down into my desk.

"Are you okay?" Bella whispered.

"Uh, yeah." My stomach rolled when she spoke to me.

"Okay, class…take out Hamlet. We'll start at Act 3, scene 2. . .Mr. Cullen, you'll have to get a copy from the library sometime today. I apologize."

I nodded, sitting back and looking around me.

"We can share." Bella bit her full bottom lip and scooted her desk closer to me. She held out the book, and I was happy—just to be so close. "I would have died up there…That looked horrible," she commented.

"Yeah." I breathed.

"Sorry about them—Jimmy." She didn't look at me. "Um…Jasper is nice. It's cool that you met him so early on."

"Yeah." That seemed to be the only word in my vocabulary at the moment.

"I bet you met Tanya, too…Jasper's shadow?" she giggled.

I sighed.

As class wore on, Bella and I didn't speak anymore. She fidgeted in her seat, and I caught her pushing a pant leg up her skirt underneath the desk. When her head leaned into me as she reached down, I sniffed her hair. It smelled like flowers—like girl.

"Did you just…" Bella looked to me.

I sniffled. "Cold." I pointed to my nose.

She flushed crimson. "I don't believe you."

I crookedly grinned. "Y-you smell nice. What is—"

"Oh, shoot!" Rosalie said behind me. "Psst!" She poked my shoulder.

All too eager, I whipped around to her, while Mr. Banner was engrossed in belting out the Shakespeare.

"I broke my pencil…do you have another?" she asked.

"S-sure." I felt my pocket, grabbed one for her, and then dropped it.

Bella and I went for it at the same time, and we knocked our heads together.

"Crap." She chuckled, rubbing her forehead.

"I'm—" I stared at Bella, horrified and rubbed my own head. "So—"

"Edward?" Rosalie touched my shoulder, and I convulsed where I sat. "The pencil?"

I nodded and turned to give it to her.

"You could apologize…" I heard Bella say.

Rosalie's hand had touched mine, lingering as she took it from my grasp. "Thank—thank you," I said.

"Shouldn't _I_ be saying that?" She grinned. "Thank you, Edward." I loved the way my name sounded coming from her mouth, and then I wondered what that mouth could do.

"Yo-you're welcome." I swallowed loudly and turned back around.

Unfortunately, when I went to lean over Bella's shoulder, she cringed away from me. "The library is on the second level." She gave me a glare and looked back to the book, muttering the word _asshole_.

"Um…" I couldn't figure out what I had done.

**…o.0…**

For the rest of class, I barely paid attention. Feeling like a live wire, I didn't know if it was because of the brown-eyed beauty with the scowl to my left or the pin-up model behind me. I was just nervous and sat stock-still until the bell rang.

But that didn't stop my mind from wandering. I kept imagining Rosalie hauling a huge wrench, while wearing the sexy version of Bella's mechanic's uniform—shorts and the shirt tied around her belly.

"_Hey, big boy, wanna change my oil?" _ She'd say in a breathy voice, and I'd take out my dipstick to…

I kept trying to keep that image at bay.

Or Bella, with those innocent eyes and Natalie Wood face kneeling before me…

The brown-eyed beauty was the first to hightail it out of there, and I took my time moseying out of the room.

"Edward?"

I turned back to Rosalie in the doorway.

"Thank you." She handed me the pencil.

"No-no problem." I stammered, feeling my cheeks get hot.

She giggled and touched my chest before she left the room.

During second period, trigonometry, I saw Bella again. This time I didn't get a seat next to her, but even if I had it wouldn't have mattered. She never looked my way.

Third period, Mrs. Goff made me introduce myself again. Jasper was a real buddy and gave me some encouraging words. He said, "Don't fall."

My steps didn't fail me, and I felt a bit confident. Rosalie kept smiling at me, and then while I was up there, she giggled with Alice. I had a feeling they were talking about me.

"Hi!" Some girl with curly brown hair greeted me in the hallway. She was a dolly, but nothing like what I witnessed in Latin, English, or this morning. "You're new."

"I'm Edward." I closed my locker.

"Right…I'm Jessica, by the way—hold my books." She slammed her books into my hands. "My class is this way."

"Okay, yeah, no problem. I'll walk you to class." I shook my head at her. She immediately got on my nerves.

"Thank you, Edward." She linked her arm with mine and we took off down the hall.

"Hi, Edward!" Tanya cut us off.

"Beat it, Denali!" Jessica spat.

Tanya ran off, and I think Jessica might be the lesser of two evils.

"So…I heard you're trying out for the baseball team?"

"I am?" I grinned at her.

"Oh…that's what I heard Rosalie say."

"She—she did?" I nearly tripped over my own two feet.

"Well, yeah." Jessica beamed at me. "You okay?"

I nodded. "Yes…I'll be trying out."

"Great…The Spartans need all the help they can get, even if there are only a few games left in the season." She took her books from me. "Thanks!" She enthusiastically waved and entered her class.

I was shoved into the lockers. "Watch it!" Emmett glared.

Then Jimmy pushed past me, as did Paul.

After taking the shoulder beating, I went to History.

The rest of my morning classes passed without incident. At lunch, Jasper waved me down from the lunch line and I sat at his table.

"Hey, Jake…" I smiled as he passed me.

He ignored me, going over to where Emmett and the rest of those guys were sitting.

"Don't take it personal," Jasper said. "It's just the way things are."

"Oh." I took a seat, looking around. "Is Tanya going to hop out of garbage can?"

Jasper laughed. "No. She has lunch fifth period."

"Cool," I said.

"Hello!" Jessica plopped down next to me. "Is this seat taken?"

I shook my head.

"Jess!" Rosalie shouted, and then Jessica went running over to where Rosalie and Alice were sitting with a few other girls.

While watching Jessica's ponytail bob as she walked, I noticed Rosalie smiling at me. I smiled back and put my hand up.

Then, because the universe hates me, I was hit on the back of my head.

"Sorry," Bella said, anything but sorry. It seemed she hit me with her book. It was on purpose since she was walking so close.

"It's okay." I watched her sit with another girl, who wore thick-framed, cat-eye glasses.

"Whoa…I'm so glad you moved here," Jasper commented. "That's the most interaction I've ever had with chicks…by association."

Rubbing the bump on my head, I looked down to the slop that was my lunch.

**…0.o…**

Jake had to work at the garage later that day, and he made us walk home from there. It was no big deal, as we beggars can't be choosy.

"What the fuck are you staring at?" Emmett was suddenly in front of me. What I _was _staring at were his sister's very erect nipples that showed through her white t-shirt.

Then Bella looked up at me while she buttoned her coveralls—hiding her nipples. She was nestled inside the office—away from most onlookers—so my staring was pretty blatant, and I'm a moron.

"I—I—" I didn't want to get my ass kicked.

"We're sorry," Jasper said. "We were just passing by."

Emmett nodded and paved the way with an arm gesture, while he stepped to the side.

"What's going on?" Jimmy appeared, smacking a mallet against his palm.

"Guys…cool it," Bella said.

"Get inside." Paul nudged her into the office and closed the door, and then he leaned against it.

"Let me out!" She banged against the door.

But then, everything was okay. A police officer emerged from the garage.

"Oh, thank God." I breathed.

"Boys," the cop greeted and walked past us.

"What?" I was confused.

"Emmett, those things were the size of my thumb earlier." Jake rolled his eyes, puffing on a cigarette and leaning coolly against the Coca-Cola machine. "Tell Bells to cover that shit up." Jake looked to me, and he was totally talking out of his ass because I was actually leering into the office—like the male version of Tanya.

"Let me out!" Bella banged against the door. Paul had mischievous eyes as he stepped away from the door. "Let me—" Bella came tumbling out of the office and into my arms.

She was safe—nestled for the briefest of seconds in my grasp, but then I remembered her brother. And before she could right herself, I dropped her onto the ground.

"Asshole!" She wore a sideways baseball cap now. Her pant legs were rolled up a ways, showing those socks. She looked so damn cute as she leaned back on her palms, glaring at me. Like earlier, even with the scowl, she had the face of an angel.

Emmett laughed, and then they all backed off.

"Um, uh, I am so, so sorry, angel face." Regardless of the audience, I put my hand out for hers.

She took my hand, and I tried to ignore how good it felt.

Shivering from the contact, I went to pull her up.

When Emmett flinched toward me, I let her fall back onto the ground.

"Asshole!" she shouted after me, because I had decided to run home.

And Jasper was right behind me, so I didn't feel too bad.

Tanya was waiting for me in my driveway.

And I wanted to run back to Seattle.

**Thank you for reading!**

**Please leave me your thoughts!**

**Next chapter…Well, this one was a bonus. I cannot believe the response this got! **

**Since it's still being beta'd, I can't commit to daily updates. You'll get another on Thursday or Friday!**

**Let me know what you think!**

**Creepers - Edward's shoes**

**Pad - house**

**goosed - tricked out/souped up, in regards to cars.**


	3. Little League

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA**

**BrownEyedGirl24 - :) I wish I could answer you in better detail (be able to contact you) but see above disclaimer?**

"**Made in the Shades"**

**Chapter Three: Little League**

_All generalizations are false, including this one _—Mark Twain

Coach Clapp had no problems inviting me to join the baseball team. As the days wore on, I filled my afternoons with practice, games, and a little homework. I figured if I passed my first semester here, Dad might be inclined to get me that car.

Regardless of ignoring us at school, Jake proved to be a cool guy. On weekends, he let us ride with him to the drive-in; however, we had to watch from the concession stand because that lucky bastard always had a girl with him.

Tanya's mom always dropped her off at the concession stand, too. She was okay in moderation and when Jasper snapped at her, she always calmed down.

The first night I went to the drive-in, Tanya and a few younger girls bum-rushed me. My annoying neighbor had said, "Doesn't he look like James Dean?" And then they all followed me—these fourteen-year-old girls. It was cute at first, as were they—in that puppy and baby kind of way. Even the ones that had developed a little early—I couldn't think about them the way I wanted to—under me, over me, naked, on their knees—they were little girls.

As much as I'd like to, I do not look like James Dean, no matter how well I copy his style.

The drive-in in Port Angeles and the diner here in Forks were the premiere hot spots.

Jasper and I always went to one place or the other on Friday and Saturday nights. My status never changed. I never became popular or scored any dates with girls—at least those my own age.

Jessica set us up for a date, but then cancelled on me at the last minute. She said she, Rosalie, and Alice were going to have a girls' night. We never made plans for anything else after that. The girls in my class were cordial, but none were as forward as Jessica.

Every day, I'd talk a little more to Rosalie, and that was enough.

Yet, the interaction did nothing for my social status. I was officially a nobody at another school again.

"Can you at least look where you're going?" Bella nearly shouted at me.

Throughout the weeks, I had learned that Bella Swan was a walking disaster.

My first day—when she bumped into me the second time—probably _was_ an accident.

And just like today, I'd never tell her that _she_ bumped into_ me_. "Sorry."

Her cheeks became red and her brow furrowed as she continued walking along.

"I really am sorry!" I called after her, wishing she were as sweet as she was that first day—that one class. She's hated me since that day.

"Who are you shouting at?" Peter asked. He's another buddy of Jasper's.

"No one," I said, continuing to walk. School was over, and I wondered what we were doing after the game. "Drive-in or…"

"Everyone's going to the diner," Ben—Peter's best friend—said, joining us.

"She smiled at me—ME!" Jasper attacked me, throwing himself at my back, and then settling down. "I'm going to ask her out tonight. She and her family are staying in town for Thanksgiving. Maybe I can get her to come over tomorrow for dessert." He ranted.

I gave Jasper a brief glance. "Who?"

"Who?" Jasper scoffed. "Alice—that's who. She fought with Paul earlier. Maybe—"

"Um…Jazz?" I asked, noticing he still had mustard on his lip from lunch.

"What?" He was buzzing with excitement.

"You got a little…" I pointed to his lip.

"That's probably why Alice smiled," Ben guffawed. "She was trying not to laugh!"

"Fuck!" Jazz hissed before he left out a side exit.

Then shouting caught my attention. Emmett and Rosalie were locked in a heated argument. When he turned to stare me down for looking, I averted my gaze.

Sighing, I trailed behind Peter and Ben to the locker rooms.

We lost—9–6—to the Quileute Wolves. It was still an awesome game, even if it was the last this year, as I was able to see Rosalie cheering us on. Throughout the game, she kept throwing me these bright smiles as she shook her pom-poms and her…

I stopped that thought in its tracks, as I was still in the locker room. Getting stiff in the showers would definitely get my ass kicked.

Whatever she and Emmett were fighting over obviously didn't get her down.

Today I didn't have a ride, so I left the school on foot. It was actually sunny, although chilly today.

"Edward!" I turned to see Alice, still in her cheer uniform, run over to me. "Hey!" She daintily waved.

I gave her a tight-lipped smile and a curt nod. We'd never really spoken before.

"Rose broke up with Emmett."

My brows shot up. "Oh…" I put my hands in my pockets.

"Yeah, so…she's sitting on the bleachers…alone, if you want to meet her."

I nodded.

"You should go talk to her." She smiled, openly checking me out.

I cleared my throat. "Um…why—why would I do that?" I asked.

Alice giggled, placing her hand on my forearm.

"I mean…" I squirmed under her touch. "What am I supposed to do?" I wasn't sure if this was a prime opportunity to ask her out or what.

She turned her head when Paul called her. "If I have to tell you that," she looked back to me, her tone suggestive, "you shouldn't bother going." She skipped over to Paul. "Good luck!"

Paul glared at me for talking to his girl, and I backed away with my hands raised.

Slowly, I walked over to the field. Rosalie was easy to spot. She had her hair down, long cheer skirt still on, and her long legs peeking out from underneath, smiling up at the sun. Her sweater with the Spartans emblem was so tight around her tits and showed from under her coat. I had to stop and regroup—get my thoughts in order before I said anything stupid.

"Edward!" Tanya jumped in front of me.

"Not now," I told her.

"I wanted to ask you if you wanted to come over after school today."

"No." I stared over her at Rosalie, who had spotted me. "Sorry." Rosalie was giggling and it made me smile.

"Oh." Tanya turned to look at Rosalie. "You and Rosie?"

"I don't know…I'll see you later." I walked around Tanya.

Rosalie smiled at me now. She was fast to gather her books and jump down from the bleachers. "Hey!" She kissed my cheek. "Is your girlfriend going to be jealous?"

"No." I chuckled. "I mean, she's not my girlfriend."

"Yeah…she's a little young. I bet it takes a woman to work you over, huh?" She rubbed up my chest.

"…ho-holy shit." I blew out a calming breath. "Al-Alice told me you were upset."

She linked her arm with mine. "I was…Emmett can be such a…" She shook her head. "Is your car that way?" She pointed to the lot.

"Um, uh, I don't—I don't have one."

"Oh." She sounded disappointed. "I just figured with your parents being so wealthy…"

"Well, my dad's a humble guy." I rushed out. "He doesn't like anything flashy—likes small town living and being modest."

She twirled her pearls on her finger.

"He's getting me one for Christmas, though…And I can borrow his whenever," I lied through my teeth to the _very _pretty girl.

She smiled and rested her head on my shoulder as we began to walk. Cautiously, I placed my arm around her shoulders.

The farther we walked away from the school, I realized that I wasn't utilizing my time with her. She said she didn't live too far from me, actually. "So…you and Emmett had a fight."

"And what if we did?" Her hand reached down to hold mine.

"Right…it's none of my business." I chuckled nervously as we walked on Main Street now. "Um…"

"No, I mean, what are you going to do about it?" She grinned.

Blowing out another nervous breath, I nodded. "Do-do you wanna go to the drive-in?" I rushed out, knowing everyone would be at the diner tonight.

"What's playing?"

"I think it's a Jimmy Dean flick—_Rebel without a Cause_—but _whatever's_ playing…" I looked down to my shoes. "I'd love to take you."

"When?" she asked.

"Uh…well, we can go now? Go to my house and pick up my mom's car." Deep down, I knew Mom wouldn't say no. She's been pestering me to "mingle" with the opposite sex.

"It's not dark yet," she laughed.

"It will be soon." I looked up to the sky. "We can get dinner first…in Port." I stopped walking. "The Italian restaurant? I don't know what else they have there, but my father gave it a rave review."

"I love La Bella Italia."

"Great!" I was so happy.

We were on the corner, and I became serious, gaining some guts. Never in my life had I been on a date, and now the most popular girl is interested. Did I mention that she's gorgeous?

"Okay…Shouldn't you change?" She looked me over.

"I'm comfortable." I wanted to seal the deal before she was out of my sight.

She nodded, looking at me shyly through her lashes. "Great…if you don't mind me in this." She plucked her cheer skirt.

"You—you look beautiful," I said.

"You're sweet," she sighed, resting her head on my shoulder again as we started walking. We were still going in the same direction because she lives three blocks from me.

We didn't talk much after that. Then, when we were about to cross in front of Swan's Garage, my stomach tied in knots. "Let's—let's go this way." I pointed across the street.

"This way is shorter." She pulled my hand, and I noticed Emmett staring so hard in my periphery. I thought I was going to have a heart attack.

"Um…"

Right in front of a gas pump, Rosalie stopped us and reached up to push my hair back. "I love your hair."

By now, Bella had emerged from the office, looking adorable in her dark blue coveralls and sideways baseball cap. She watched the show alongside her brother, and I noticed a little grease streak on her cheek. Like I said, adorable and now, fucking hot. She's not afraid to get her hands dirty—not that I do, necessarily. I don't know dick about cars. Fuck. Emmett was going to kill me.

"Rosalie…" I stopped her hands, placing mine over hers, but that might not have been the best idea. I wanted a date, maybe a kiss. What I didn't want was to get my ass beat by Emmett in front of Bella _and_ Rosalie.

"We need to hurry," she said. "I can't wait—We can sit in the backseat, where we can make out." She trailed her hands down my chest, speaking _so_ loudly.

Then I watched Emmett tear a tire right off a rim—with his bare fucking hands. That's going to be me, only he'll be ripping my arm off.

Bella had her eyes narrowed as she mouthed, "asshole", and then she stalked back into the office.

"Come on." Rosalie grabbed my hand firmly, and we safely walked around the corner.

My heart rate had yet to slow, and I kept looking behind us, wondering when Emmett was going to chase me down with a crowbar or something.

"I'm right up this street," I managed to say, pointing, and seeing Mom's car in the distance.

"Oh…" Rosalie smacked her forehead. "I just remembered."

All my hopes and dreams deflated before me.

"I have to babysit tonight."

"Well, how about tomorrow?" I asked.

She stared at me.

I stared at my shoes. "If you want…"

"Tomorrow is Thanksgiving," she said.

"Friday or Saturday?" I was hopeful.

"No good. I promised Alice we'd…" She never continued. "Soon…We'll get together soon." She smiled.

"O-okay." I nodded. "Can I still walk you home?"

"Oh, well….you're right here. And I have to go back that way." She pointed toward the garage. "No worries, Eddie." She kissed my cheek again, and then she was on her way.

Dumbfounded, I stared after her until my senses came back, and I ran the fuck home.

"Where's the fire?" Tanya shouted. "Did Emmett chase you?" She laughed at me.

Laughing and panting, I didn't reply.

"Leah and me were going to play Monopoly. Did you want to play?"

"Who's Leah?" I asked, hoping it was someone older.

"Here she comes now." She stared behind me.

I turned to see this person. She was this skinny little thing that, if she had shorter hair, would look like a little boy.

"Oh, Edward's here!" she shouted.

I had no idea who the young girl was, but I waved anyway. "How does she know who I am?" I asked Tanya.

"Um…we, uh, you're going to laugh." She chuckled.

I shook my head. "About?"

"He is handsome," Leah giggled.

"Thank you, Leah," I said.

"Your voice is so deep." She looked to her friend. "So lucky. Forks played really well today—I was at the game. My dad coaches the wolves."

"This is my best friend." Tanya put her arm around her. "She goes to the Quileute School."

I ignored Tanya and stepped closer to Leah with the black pigtails. "How do you know me?"

The young girl squirmed under my gaze. "Tanya showed me your picture."

My head snapped to Tanya. "How'd you get my picture?"

Tanya's face was beet red, and she had her fingers crossed.

"You gave it to her," Leah said. "Um…she said you gave it to her when you asked her to go steady." She stared at her friend.

Tanya turned and ran into her house.

"What—what happened?" Leah looked confused.

I shrugged. "Uh…I thought you were talking about a different picture." I rubbed my face, wondering if Tanya broke into my house. "Leah?"

"Yeah!" She bounced when she said that, but she had nothing to bounce.

"Can you go get Tanya?"

She furrowed her brow. "Sure."

A minute later, Leah was dragging her friend out. "He's your boyfriend—what's wrong with you?"

I chuckled. "Can I talk to you…sweetheart?" I winked at Tanya. "In private…"

"Wow…go!" Leah pushed Tanya into me.

Quickly, I put my arm around Tanya and ushered her to the other side of my house. "Why'd you lie?" I whispered.

"I don't know—I'm really sorry." She was still crying.

Instinctively, I wiped under her eyes with my thumbs. "Don't cry—I'm not worth it." I smiled. "How'd you get my—"

"I flashed Peanut for it."

I nodded, laughing. "Of course, you did."

"I can—" She went to pull up her shirt, and I stopped her.

"Please don't," I begged.

She dropped her shoulders. "I think about you all the time."

I groaned.

"Do that again." She leaned into me. "Please." She had her eyes closed.

And I thought about it, especially when I looked down to her socks. Tanya might be young, but because she's a bit on the chubby side, she had some curves and breasts.

"It's time." She palmed my pocket watch and giggled. "I'm not stupid, Edward…I'm going to be fifteen soon." She rubbed all along my clock. "Does little Eddie want to come out and play?"

"Christ." I breathed. "Tanya…" I stepped back.

"Oh, say my name, Edward Cullen!" She jumped into my arms, and we fell back onto the grass. "Take me." Her hips started rocking around the clock, like she was Bill Haley.

_Rock, rock, rock 'til broad daylight..._

"Guys?" Leah poked her head around. "Wow—sorry!" She ran away.

_We're gonna rock, gonna rock, around the clock tonight. _

"Ge-get off me!" As gently as I could—given the circumstances of my horrified state—I brought her over to my side, and then I stood up.

"You're no fun." Tanya stood up.

I pushed Tanya back so there were at least two feet between us. "Stay there."

"Don't make me tell Leah that I lied. I have a lot of friends over on the reservation, and they actually like me," she looked down, "if she sees us together, she'll tell all the girls who didn't believe me, and then—"

"Stop talking, please." I blew out a breath. "And your friend saw enough."

"I mean…can you be sweet to me?"

"If I make it real good, and I mean _real_ good, will you stop following me and Jasper around?"

She thought about it for too long.

"I'll take you and Leah for ice cream."

"Neat-o!" She hugged me so tight.

"And you'll stop following us?"

"Yes."

I held out my hand and cringed on the inside. "Let's go pick up Jazz so Leah's not alone." I chuckled.

Tanya held my hand the whole way over to Jasper's. My new buddy refused to be seen with them at the soda shop. He had his imaginary reputation to protect

However, since Jasper thinks women flock to me, he came anyway.

Leah looked like she fell in love on the spot and tried to hold his hand. I don't know why, but Jasper thought it'd look better if he gave her a piggyback ride.

And then Tanya made me give her one.

"Can't you walk any faster?" Tanya kissed my neck.

Suddenly, she didn't seem so fucking heavy. With newfound trepidation, I practically ran through the garage's gas station and across the street to the soda shop.

Emmett and his buddies whistled and catcalled while Jazz and I made our mad dash.

"You boys are so sweet," Leah said.

Panting, I ushered Tanya over to a table. "You and Leah stay here." I gasped out, and then held my side and limped up to the counter with Jazz.

"Two root beer floats, please," he told the attendant. "How the fuck did you do that?" he asked me.

I was breathing too hard, and I couldn't answer him. But I had enough strength to punch his arm for suggesting piggyback rides in the first place. "Why?"

"I give my little cousins rides all the time. They're like eight, but…"

Jasper and I looked back to our young dates and waved.

"Now what?" Jasper asked.

"We buy them the floats and…"

"You guys are sick," Bella said. "Those are little girls."

Closing my eyes tightly, I turned around to her. "Uh...um." I became tongue-tied, staring into her beautiful eyes.

Jasper quickly came to my rescue. "Tanya told her friend that this one was her boyfriend," he whispered. "Edward's being a nice guy—pretending."

Bella had a brow raised and her arms folded across her chest. "Then why did Tanya say she let you round second base?"

I winced.

"You did?" Jasper laughed at me. "You sick fuck."

"No, I didn't," I said—maybe lied—hell, I have no idea. "My hands went no-nowhere near her…"

"Tits?" Bella smirked.

"Yeah…" I trailed my hand through my hair, instantly turned on. Bella just said "tits", and I had never heard a girl speak that way before. "I didn't touch her…she's lying."

"Don't keep me waiting long, Eddie!"

The three of us turned back to the table. Tanya blew me a kiss.

Bella giggled and touched my chest. "Don't keep her waiting long, Eddie." I couldn't believe she touched me. Was she flirting? I thought I was an asshole?

My jaw dropped and my eyes followed her hips as she made her way out of the soda shop. It was insignificant, but I noticed she had nothing in her hands. "Di-did you f-follow us in here?"

She righted her cap as her eyes widened. "Maybe, um," she tripped over the step and made the bells sound on the door, "just wanted to tell you to date girls your own age."

"That's your cue," Jasper whispered. "Fuck Emmett. Go over there." He gave me a push.

With the forced running start, I stomped my way over to her. "Um…like who?"

"What?" she asked, and I followed her out of the shop. Now that I was closer, Bella seemed very nervous, like she might bolt at any moment. It was cool because my heart was beating so fast, I thought I might vomit.

And we were only standing there.

"I have to get back." She jerked a thumb behind herself. "We're closing early tonight."

"Oh." I put my hands in my pockets. "Wh-what are you doing for the holiday?"

She shrugged, shaking her head. "Nothing...having dinner with my family."

"Me too." I looked down.

"So…things didn't work out with Hale, huh?" She looked back to the garage, where Emmett and Rosalie were making out on his motorcycle.

Emmett being distracted was working out for me now, though. "Did you want a root beer float?"

"I'm not fourteen."

"Oh, I know you're not." My eyes went to her tits and then her hips.

"And I don't share." Her voice was so shaky, and yet she was a pro at this flirting stuff.

I was damn near towering over her now. "You wouldn't have to. I'm yours—"

The bell on the door sounded, and then I was suddenly covered in ice cream soda.

"What the...?" I widened my arms, staring at Tanya.

"Jasper, you were right." She looked back to my friend. "He is cheating on me!" she shouted, pointing a finger at me.

Jazz smiled at me.

"No!" I hollered. "I mean, shit—" I shook the excess from my arms.

"Pig!" Leah got me with hers. "You deserve better…come on, Tan." The children continued to thrust their glasses into Jasper's hands, and then walk off in an embrace.

"Why?" I asked Jasper.

He shrugged. "They were annoying as hell and a deal's a deal. You were her boyfriend, and now she has to leave us alone. Did you really want to sit with them for another hour?"

"You're a genius," I said.

"I know…now let's go."

I nodded. "Yeah, we can go to the movies and—" I turned to Bella—who I had forgotten was there. "Sorry."

She gave me a small smile. "Have fun."

"Wait!" I stepped closer. "Um…hi."

She laughed and fingered some whipped cream off my chest. "Sweet." She stuck her finger in her fucking—delectable—mouth, and then she ran across the street.

"Fucking-babe-magnet. I'm so glad you moved here," Jasper said. "Now if only we can get the women to _stay_ around you…" he laughed.

"Yeah…" I agreed.

**Thank you for reading. **

**Anyone interested in what's on Bella's mind?**

**This is Edward's story, but I did add two BPOVs to it.**

**Please leave me your thoughts. **


	4. The Stage Show

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA**

"**Made in the Shades"**

**Chapter Four: The Stage Show**

**(Bella)**

_It's no wonder that truth is stranger than fiction. Fiction has to make sense_

—_Mark Twain_

The first day back to school after Christmas break was depressing. My new schedule only had me in English and lunch with Edward. During Trig, I was able to ogle him by my lonesome because none of our friends had it. He went on to Trigonometry Two, and I went on to Home Economics instead—the school did it, not me.

I barely see him anymore. For the past month, I've tried my hardest to stop liking him, but whatever I'm doing isn't working. I've even taken to paying attention in Home Economics and taking _The Good Wife's Guide_ into consideration—trying to read up on what makes a man happy—and it's not working. Living with three males doesn't give me much to go off of. They like food, cars, and women—that's all Emmett and Paul are into anyway.

My father is never home and, sadly, I hardly know him or what makes him happy.

It's not like I can show up at Edward's house and ask him if I can iron his clothes for school the next day.

Never in my life have I seen a boy as handsome as him. And I've also never liked a boy before. Everything just became so confusing when he moved to town, for me anyway.

Everyone in this town knows me.

And he's the first guy to ever look at me, like I was a woman—an actual lady, with breasts and stuff.

Sighing, I hugged my book to my chest as I walked home. Romeo was just so gone for Juliet. Knowing they die at the end doesn't change how epic their romance was. I've read the play twice on my own, and now we're to read it for English.

Last night, I was so excited to start the assignment, I started reading ahead—to get Romeo and Juliet's all-consuming love.

None of the immature idiots around me appreciate it.

Months ago, the whole school was abuzz when _Rebel without a Cause_ hit the drive-in. All the girls swooned over Jim and Judy's romance, but I don't think they even grasped the concept. They—meaning Jim and Judy—didn't really have the lovey-dovey-ness aspect.

They were two people who bonded because they were going through similar circumstances.

That's the way I saw it, and I'd watch James Dean take a bath—I'd watch that man do anything.

I still loved the movie, but Jim and Judy don't compare to Romeo and Juliet.

I go to school with a bunch of idiots.

Then again, I know nothing about love or boys, so I'm just speculating.

Laughter—a specific laugh, actually—made me pause. I almost dropped my book, so it could follow my stomach, but thankfully I didn't.

"Oh…that jacket is classic!"

Peering over the hedges, I spied Jasper wearing a red jacket, just like the one in the _Rebel without a Cause_ movie poster.

"I wish my parents were as cool as yours." Edward trailed his hand through his hair.

Sometimes, when he's quiet and sitting next to me in English, I just want to reach over and run my fingers through it, too. It looks so soft…

"What?" Jasper asked. "You're wearing the same jacket Cal Trask wore in _East of Eden_."

Edward smiled and smoothed down his coat. "Yeah…this is warm, though. I can wear it this winter. You're going to freeze."

"Nah…when it gets really cold, I'll wear my old one," Jasper replied. "Alice saw me with my mom buying this. She said she liked it."

"Oh…did you want to go with me to Port Angeles? I heard there's a decent record store. It's been too long since I got new sides. Hey! You should totally come check out the record player I got for Christmas." Edward seemed cranked about it, and that made me smile. His bronze hair was a mess and blew every which way in the wind.

"Sure. But, I gotta go home for dinner first." Jasper shrugged.

"Just eat here. We're going to watch _The Stage Show_ together anyway, right?" Edward asked.

"What are you doing?"

I stiffened and turned to Tanya. "Hey," I said.

She smiled and came toward me. "I love it when he wears the green cardigan," she whispered.

I nodded, staring. He wore that sweater today, and it really brings out his eyes.

"You like him?" Tanya asked.

"No," I lied. "Th-they were talking about Alice. She's one of my good friends, so…"

Tanya sucked her teeth. "Jasper would never say anything bad about Alice, neither would Edward. They're so sweet."

I smiled. "Yeah…"

"I thought you hated Edward?"

I shook my head no. "Not even a little bit," I sighed. "I should go."

"He thinks you hate him," she said.

Pretending like I didn't hear her, I backed up a few paces. "See ya."

"Bye," she whispered, still watching.

With my head down, I speedily walked past Edward's lawn. As soon as I appeared, they became so quiet, and it made my stomach ache.

"B-bella?"

I turned around while I continued to walk, but then I stopped. The roads and walkways are still a little icy, and I didn't want to fall. "Hey, guys!" I raised my hand in greeting.

"Wait up…" Edward shouted, placing his books down. "Do you—um—need me to walk you home?" He looked to his driveway. "M-my mom's letting me use her car. I'm about to go to Port Angeles…I can drive you home first."

"Hey!" Jasper shouted and nudged Edward. "I can't go." He stared at me. "Um…he's going to Vinny's in Port A. Why don't you go with him?"

Edward looked to Jasper wide-eyed, and he didn't look happy at all.

"I can't." My face immediately flushed. It always does when he's around. "I can manage—get home. Thanks." I turned and just kept walking.

My best course of action was to ignore the blush and all contact with him. He's too far gone on Rosalie to even know I exist. In fact, this is the quickest way home, and I never take it anymore because I have to pass his house.

I don't_ need_ him; I _want_ him to want to take me home.

And that's never going to happen.

He's so respectful and thoughtful and sweet. He'd walk me home without complaint if I had said yes, but would he have wanted to?

Yes, probably to come check out Rosalie.

After work, Emmett and Rosalie slobber all over each other on the couch until Dad gets home. Her late afternoon activities are no secret.

At first, I tried to get Edward's attention away from her. Whenever I'd see them talking—because they talk quite a lot—I'd try to wave, sway my hips, or smile at Edward.

He doesn't even notice.

Sadly, Rosalie's just playing Edward. She did the same with some senior square named Mike Newton last year. She threatened all the girls, telling them not to go near Mike. He was, like, blackballed from the dating pool, and was miraculously around every time Rose needed to make Emmett jealous.

Mike Newton also came from a well-to-do family, and so Rosalie would occasionally bring him around hers.

It's not like she can bring Emmett home to her parents. My brother gets decent grades, works, and he stays out of trouble; however, all people see when they _see_ him is the leather and the bike, which to some mean trouble.

The Hales would probably adore Emmett, if Rosalie ever got off her high horse and introduced them.

God, I hate her.

And sometimes I hate Emmett for always forgiving her. My brother loves her so much and is willing to settle on anything she can give him. I understand love—sort of—and I never say anything to Emmett. I can make sense of his reasoning.

I just wish Rosalie wasn't such a bitch.

Every time they break up, I wish it was the last time, but not anymore. She'll sink her claws into Edward, and I don't want to see that.

"Hey, squirt!" Paul snatched my cap off.

By now, my thoughts had made me sad. I didn't even fight him for it.

"What's for dinner?" he asked.

"Um…meatloaf."

"We just had that," he complained.

"Ground beef is cheap," I muttered, bypassing the entire living room.

Paul and I usually ignore Emmett and Rosalie. At least Alice has some respect. She told me that, despite my cousin's rough exterior, he's never gotten fresh with her. Alice messes around, but only above the waist.

God knows what really happens under Rosalie's long skirts.

I shuddered and slapped the meat on the counter.

Emmett and Dad bored me to tears during dinner. They kept talking about the garage, while Paul and I exchanged expressions of dismay. Paul isn't as into mechanics like Emmett. He's, believe it or not, quite the intellectual. My cousin, luckily and unfortunately, has the means to go to college. Since his father died, he no longer has to stick around and run the business, and now has insurance money to pay his tuition. If my uncle, Paul Sr., was still around he'd have to stay here in Nowheresville.

"Don't read this garbage at the dinner table." Paul tapped my book. He caught me reading Romeo and Juliet.

"Can it." I spat, picking up the book. "Eat your food." I glanced over at Emmett and Dad to see that they weren't interrupted. Paul is also annoying. He's the brother I never had, while Em would never dream of teasing me or destroying my toys as a kid, Paul always did.

"O Edward, Edward!" Paul called in a breathy voice.

"Stop!" I smacked the back of his head.

He stood up, to appear like he was looking down a balcony. "Wherefore art thou Edward? Deny thy _br_o_ther and refuse_ thy name; Or, if thou wilt not, be but sworn _my_ love, and I'll no longer be a Swan..." He fluttered his lashes.

"Oh my God!" I palmed my face, wondering if the whole world knew of my crush.

"Who's Edward?" Dad asked.

"The Cullen kid," Emmett laughed.

"You like him?" Dad looked to me. "His father is a good man. That's a good family." He nodded, pursing his lips.

"I..." I didn't want to lie or admit anything. "I hate you!" I smacked Paul again, while he laughed.

"Relax, Unc," Paul told Charlie. "I was just joshing." He looked to me, widening his eyes. "Honest."

Dad cleared his throat. "Are you dating this boy, Bells?"

"No!" I shrieked. "My gosh...just stop." I stared down at my plate, but pleaded with Paul.

"Him, really?" Emmett asked me, making a face.

"No." I shook my head. "Just..."

Paul laughed. "He's a-"

"Paul," Emmett warned and then his hand came to rest on top of mine. "A guy like that...he's only after one thing."

I nodded, which is what I always do while wishing we could change the subject.

"Is Edward interested?"

I stared wide-eyed at my father.

"You know, Bells...You're getting to be that age. You _should_ date."

"Dad!" Emmett hollered.

"She's going to need to start looking for a husband soon."

"It's 1956, not 1936..." Emmett shook his head. "Times are changing. She doesn't _have_ to do anything."

Dad placed a hand on Emmett's shoulder. "She has to be cared for-"

"What the hell am I?" my brother asked.

"We can't hold her hostage, to take care of us-"

"It's not about that," Emmett said, and they kept talking like I wasn't in the room...about _my_ future.

"Thanks." I sneered at Paul.

"Sorry," he whispered. "Did you ever think about applying for scholarships?"

Staring at my brother and father, I shook my head no.

"I'm sure they'd let you go to college if you got accepted." Paul stared at them too. "If Unc's willing to marry you off, I'm sure he'll be cool with-"

"Just..." I swallowed and stood from the table. "Excuse me...I'll be down to clean up in a little while." I announced, before I went up to my bedroom.

Paul and Emmett actually cleaned up the kitchen, and then my brother came knocking on my bedroom door.

"You don't have to do anything."

Sitting up, because I was just lying on my bed, I stared at him.

"I mean it. And I'm not saying this in the hopes you stick around." He came in to sit on my bed. "When the right guy comes along, you'll know...and I don't think that time is now. You're young-"

"I'm only a year younger than you," I said.

He shook his head. "You're younger at heart."

"Well, I wouldn't be...if you and Charlie ever let me grow up. I'm old enough to clean, cook, and do laundry, but I'm not old enough to make my own decisions?" I nearly shouted. "Maybe if I dated...maybe if I was used to boys...you've always scared them away!"

"Whoa!" He put his hands up. "Dad and I are just looking out for you. We'll-"

"How can you say times are changing, when you and Charlie..."

"You want to keep house, have a few ankle-biters, and stay here?" he asked. "You don't sound like you enjoy doing it. Will having a husband change that?"

"I don't know what I want. You and Charlie deciding doesn't-"

"Are we talking about the same things?" He scratched his head.

I swallowed. "I have no idea, since you won't even let me get a word out," I whispered. "You're so concerned about my virtue, like it's the most important thing in the world."

"Haven't we always been a team?" He palmed my cheek.

I looked away from him.

"Bells, the right guy? He won't care. He'll beat the crap out of me, or try to, just to date you. He won't let me stop him. Until that guy comes along, just be patient." He tapped my nose. "And...you're going to college. I'm going to see to it."

He left with high hopes, and I knew I was never going to leave this town.

Paul poked his head in. "Hey, can you sew this?" He held up a flannel shirt. "The pocket tore and..." He put it on my bed.

"Sure," I whispered.

"I'm sorry."

I waved a hand.

"Please don't be mad at me," he pleaded.

"I'm not." I grabbed the shirt.

"Okay..._The Stage Show_ starts in twenty minutes." He just stood there, staring at me.

"What?"

He shook his head. "Nothing. Thank you...for taking such good care of us." Paul came over to hug me quickly, and then he left.

Later that night, I fell in love. On January 28th, Elvis Presley appeared on _The Stage Show _for the first time.

**…0.o…**

"Did you watch it?" Angela asked. "Shake, rattle, and roll…" She wiggled her hips.

I squealed. "He's dreamy." I spoke about Elvis, but stared over at Edward.

Paul had shoved past him, and Edward dropped his books.

"I'm going to pound on Paul." I groaned.

Angela held me back. "He's not your boyfriend. He's no one to you—just some flutter bum. It's not like he's a stud, like Jakey."

We both turned to watch Mr. Banner steal the cigarette out from behind Jake's ear.

I scoffed. "Still…they walk around like they own the place, being bullies. I hate it." I slammed my locker closed. "They're cruisin' for a bruisin'." I waved my fist—so frosted until I caught Edward's gaze. "Hi." I lifted my hand.

He pretended like he didn't see me and walked away.

"Did you see that?" I actually felt like I was going to cry.

"That's kookie," Angela said, as we both stared after Edward. "He was just casting an eyeball at ya…right before Paul pushed him. That's probably_ why_ he pushed him."

Shaking my head and the tears away, my stomach rolled. "Why is all this so confusing?" I whispered, mostly to myself.

Angela sighed. "He's the first boy you're noticing?" She scrunched her nose. "I've never seen you like this before, Bells." She put her arms around me. "You're so tough." Then she giggled. "You can beat up a boy, but you can't talk to one."

"I talk…I try to flirt…bet I look like a goof."

"You don't," she promised. "But…you should maybe…I don't know. He's a cube. And cubes and squares don't go for a baby like you. Ya dig?" She raised a brow. "For some reason…even if they see the badass, tough attitude, they automatically assume you're fresh."

"Not Edward," I whispered, somehow kind of knowing he wasn't like that.

"You don't know him," she laughed. "But little do _they_ know that the queens of this town have seen more backseats than…I don't know what."

I laughed too. "I need to learn how to act like a lady. Like…what would a lady—what would you do?" I stopped to stare at her. "I mean…I wear the pencil skirts my mom left behind...Alice says they never go out of style, but how do I act?"

She pursed her lips. "Come over after school. We can talk to my mom?"

I shook my head no.

"It's best you ice it—"

"I don't know if I can," I admitted.

"Let's go to lunch," she suggested.

"Yes, lunch!" Jake shouted, placing his arms over both our shoulders. "Please allow me the honor of escorting you ladies."

Angela and I laughed.

"There's that smile." Jake pinched my cheek. "You've been so down lately…What's your tale, nightingale?"

I gave him a small smile. "Nothing."

After we got our lunches and sat down, Angela and Jake paired off and left me by myself. I hate when they do this. So, I took the small paperback that was hidden in my jacket and read it under the table.

Despite Emmett trying to keep me from boys, my father actually worries about it—worries that he's not doing the right thing for me—since the woman that gave birth to me took off after I was born. After all, I need to find a husband...

Since I'm sixteen now, my father bought me a book about dancing for Christmas. The book explains different dances, techniques, and basically what to do at a dance and in a social setting. I'm such a dork.

"Hey!" Rosalie said, sitting across from me.

"To what do I owe the pleasure?" I asked.

She winced and leaned in close. "Sweetheart, I've noticed a few things lately—like you watching Edward from afar." She turned and waved to him.

Of course, he waved back to her—fucking beaming.

Rosalie looked back to me. "Edward knows you like him too."

I gasped. "I…Rosalie, I honestly don't like him. The guy's a total spaz—a nosebleed. Trust me…" I lied.

"Don't lie. He's so handsome. It's hard not to like him." She placed her hand on mine. "Dancing?"

I hid the book under my jacket.

"Anyway," she started again, "Edward's not interested. He told me." She frowned. "He wanted me to let you down gently."

"Well…you can tell him that he has nothing to worry about." I smiled.

She winked and tapped my hand again, and then walked off toward Emmett's table.

"Rosalie." I stopped her, noticing that her slip was showing. Even if I hated her, I thought I should let her know. "Pinky's out of jail."

She giggled. "I know."

While I stared after her, I saw Alice. She stared back at me wide-eyed, and I wouldn't learn what that look meant until later that day.

School dragged after lunch. But, I thought what Rosalie said might be a good thing. Now that I knew Edward wasn't interested, I stopped looking for him in the halls. Maybe I needed to know the truth so that I could move on.

"She's lying," Alice said.

"Huh?" I closed my locker. "Are you coming over this afternoon? I'm not needed at the garage—I think Paul is home, too."

She stopped me from walking. "No. I mean, yeah, I'll be over, but listen to me." She looked so serious. "Rosalie was lying. Edward didn't tell her anything. Rosalie just doesn't like competition. She saw some doodle you did in your biology text book—_Bella and Edward_ with a heart."

I palmed my face. "That's so embarrassing."

"It's cute. I think you should talk to him."

"Nope…" I shook my head no. "There's no competition. I _can't_ compete with Rosalie anyway."

**A few weeks later**

"So, Bells," James whispered, leaning over the work desk. "Did you want to…maybe go to the diner tonight? Dinner, my treat."

I shook my head no and forged Charlie's signature on a check so I could pay the light bill.

"Let the boys fend for themselves," he laughed. "Oh…are you worried about Emmett?" He brought his voice low again. "We don't have to tell him. I meant, we can go eat before anyone shows to hang out tonight."

I chuckled. "James, I don't—I mean, I'm not interested in boys—"

"At all?" His eyes widened. "You can tell me. I kind of thought so…I—I mean—wow." He rubbed his forehead.

"Huh?" I stuffed the check in the envelope. Then it dawned on me. "No! I do…like boys. I'm not queer, I just—I don't want to date while I'm in high school," I lied.

"If you're not interested in me—"

"I'm sorry." I slumped my shoulders.

"Jim," Jake announced. "Take over the pumps for a bit." He walked in to plop down in a chair, and then he rubbed his hands together. "It's freezing out there."

"Sure, sure." James winked at me, and then left the office.

Jake laughed. "You're a little heartbreaker, you know that?"

"Yeah, right," I grumbled. "The only guy who ever liked me—likes, I guess—is Jimmy." I stuck my tongue out. "I've known him since forever, like you."

"Hey, I'd never kick you out of the backseat." He threw a rag at me.

I threw it back. "You're so gross."

"Jimmy's a coward anyway. I heard what he said—_Emmett doesn't have to know_."

I nodded and turned to him. "Who's your dolly for the week?"

He grinned. "I asked Ang out, but she's still turning me down. Do you have any idea why?"

"Maybe she's not interested," I lied. My best friend is head over heels for Jake, but he's always with a different girl. She doesn't want to be one of his flings.

"There are no guys at Forks High you'd want to date? 'Cause, I can set it up. Then you can set Ang and me up." Jake wiggled his eyebrows.

"Nope," I lied, willing my blush to stay at bay.

He laughed. "I know you're lying."

I didn't reply. "Is Mr. Fitzsimmons' car ready?" I asked. "I told him to pick it up at closing today."

Jake nodded. "Emmett's working on the brakes now—should be ready." He paused with his mouth partly opened. "You know who else likes you? Who's a bumbling idiot—turns into one—when he sees you?"

"Huh?" I was confused. "Who?"

"My buddy Edward."

"No!" I shrieked. "He doesn't. I've flirted and—" I gasped and stopped speaking. "I—I—what I meant was—"

Jake almost fell onto the floor because he was laughing so hard.

"It's not funny!" I threw another rag at him. "Don't razz my berries. It's not nice."

"_Razz_ your berries?" He stopped chuckling. "What would it take to razz 'em, huh?" He winked.

I laughed.

"I know, I'm gross…but I'm not lying. A word from the bird…The guy likes you, and thinks you hate him. I'd be nice. He might just—"

"He's into Rosalie."

"Forget about that junk heap. Leave her to Emmett. If you like Cullen, be nice to him."

I shook my head no. "I've been being nice to him," I whispered. "He's…I don't know."

"Allow me to apologize beforehand, for what I am about to say…to a lady." He batted his eyelashes.

"Jake, please…"

He smirked. "Fine, I warned you… Rosalie's the kind of girl you _fuck_ and toss to the side for a chick like you—a cute, baby doll you can bring home to Momma. Rosalie…anyone with a brain can see through her." Jake made a face. "Edward's a guy, and Rosalie's got a body made for sin. He's going to pay attention just in case she throws him a bone…but he actually_ likes_ you." He pointed at me. "There's a difference, trust me."

"I don't—"

He stood up to stand before me. "You're the kind of girl a cat can fall in love with." He pinched my cheek. "So cute!"

"Get off!" I groaned, smacking his hand away. "Don't say stuff like that. It just—it—He'll never ask me out. He runs from Emmett, and Emmett loves to screw with him."

Jake sighed. "Just…the next time you see him, be nice."

"Sometimes I wave…and he pretends he doesn't see me," I whispered. "That makes me want to cry," I admitted. "Don't tell anyone."

Jake grinned. "I won't." He tapped on my cap, and then left the office.

But then my stomach filled with butterflies. I know Jake wouldn't lie. He's one of my best friends, and the only guy who doesn't see me as a porcelain doll—one who can do a decent oil change.

"Excuse me, son?"

I lifted my head to see an older gentleman wearing a trench coat and a fedora. He looked like Humphrey Bogart only so much more handsome.

_Wow…_

"Oh, my apologies, madam." He flashed me a breathtaking smile and took off his hat, but his eyes also zeroed in on my bust and then my hips. It reminded me of Edward. "Please, allow me to apologize." He gave me a curt nod.

And I don't know if he's apologizing again for checking me out, or calling me a boy. It's probably the latter because the first was curiosity—he thought I was a boy. Fuck.

Like I didn't feel bad enough.

I have to start dressing sexier—better, like a lady, for crying out loud.

"It-it's okay." I found myself blushing. "How—how can I help you?" I rapidly tore off my cap and combed through my low ponytail. "Sorry."

He waited until my hands stopped, before he spoke. "I'd like to have my car detailed—just checked out and tuned up. I just purchased a new vehicle, but I want my Royal in top shape for my son."

"Oh…" I nodded.

"Yes, if someone can take a look, that'd be great. I'll be by later on to settle the tab."

"We can call you when it's ready—"

"It's a surprise. My son will probably pick the car up himself. Edward has been a trooper, changing schools so suddenly. Maybe you know him? About my height, reddish hair, handsome, and has no verbal filter?"

My face got even hotter. "Y-yeah…um, Cullen?"

He smiled even wider. "Check out that blush…Does my Edward have an admirer in you?"

"Oh…um…crap." I looked down. "Excuse my language, sir." Biting my lips together, I willed myself not to say anything else.

He grasped my chin, so I'd face him again. "Never hang a head as beautiful as yours."

I sighed.

He took his hand back. "I'll leave the keys with you?" He raised a brow, and now I could see the family resemblance. They share the same jaw and nose. Edward has that ruggedly, mistakenly handsome thing going on, but the guy in front of me looked like a movie star—nothing like my dad and his buddies. Wow.

"Miss?" he asked.

"Oh, I'm sorry. Huh?" I hated myself.

"I'll leave the keys with you?" He combed through his blond hair with his hand.

"Okay." I breathed, wondering if his hair would feel the same as Edward's. "Edward!" I palmed my face, because I have no idea why I shouted his name.

He stared at me for a long moment, like I was nuts. "Yes…that's my son." He cleared his throat.

"I'm having a bad day…and I was just mistaken for a boy, so…" This time I smack my forehead. "I'm sorry."

He laughed. "I truly am sorry." He reached for my hand, and then placed a kiss on my knuckles.

"Um…" No one has ever done that before, but it was so swoon-worthy.

"I saw the hat and your small stature, but as soon as you stood up, and I saw your gorgeous face…boy do I feel dense. You're a very beautiful girl, and…my Edward is very lucky to have your…attention."

"I don't like him," I lied.

"Oh." He nodded.

"I'll have one of the guys check it out—the car."

"Well," he placed the keys on the desk, "my wife is waiting for me. Take care…?"

"Bella," I said.

"Charlie's girl!" he exclaimed.

"The one and only." I enthusiastically hit the air.

"Take care, Bella." He reached to squeeze my hand this time.

As soon as he left, I ran out to see the beauty he dropped off for Edward.

I frowned, even though it's a great car.

Rosalie was going to love it.

_**Thank you for reading!**_

_**Please leave me your thoughts**_

**Frosted - angry**

**Flutter bum - hot guy**

**baby/baby doll - cute girl**

**cube - regular/normal guy who doesn't fit into most stereotypes**

**Razz berries - excite**

**Sides - vinyl records**

**Word from the bird - the truth **

**Kookie - crazy**

**Ice it - forget about it**


	5. Rebel Rouser

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA**

**I can't promise to update daily, but I'm trying. Thanks for reading and reviewing-keep those reviews coming. PLEASE! I love all the insight. **

****For the record, when Edward talks about "scoring" he's talking about kissing - not sex****

_Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society _—_Mark Twain_

"**Made in the Shades"**

**Chapter Five: Rebel Rouser**

"Peanut," I sighed, staring at my naked torso in the mirror. "I'm just not cool enough." After gazing at my pale, scrawny chest, I put a t-shirt on and then a sweater.

"Huh?" Jared looked to me from over his comic book. "You're cool."

"No…I'm really not. Maybe to you." I pursed my lips.

"I'm thirteen now."

"You are." I agreed with him.

"And I have a girlfriend." He snickered.

"Rub it in," I sighed.

"She wears a training bra," he laughed.

I raised a brow. "Is she gonna do tricks with her tits?"

He frowned. "Is that something girls have to train for?"

"The_ existence_ of tits is the trick. They exist to turn my mind into shit." I turned to look back into the mirror. "I'm not ugly..."

"No, you're very handsome."

"Thanks, Peanut." My smirk turned into a genuine grin.

"You're a nervous nelly, though. David's pretty cool with the ladies." He always talks about David and Ricky Nelson from _The Adventures of Ozzy and Harriet_, like they're our distant relatives. "They're just girls. You know?"

"When did you get so smart?" I asked.

He chuckled. "Tanya turned me into a man..." He nodded, looking smug.

My eyes widened and my mouth opened, and I wanted to curse God. There might be a slight possibility that my younger brother has scored, and I haven't. "What do you mean? She's older than you..." I shook my head.

"She's knows I'm mature for my age." He sat up. "She's only fifteen months older."

"Peanut..." I chuckled bitterly. "You're too young to...well, what'd you do?"

He grinned up to the ceiling. "We kissed...um, it was weird at first...the French kind."

Now I could palm my face because my little brother got further with a chick than I had. A kiss on the cheek is the most action I've ever gotten. And that one time Tanya jumped me. That doesn't count, since I've been trying so hard to push it out of my mind. "H-how was it?"

"I don't know. It just was..." He sounded so philosophical, and then his eyes came back to me. "Do you have fifty cents? I want to get this ring for Chelsea."

"Isn't it a little, um, early to be buying your girlfriend stuff like that?"

"It's a glow in the dark ring with her name on it. I have to send away for it." He flipped the comic book around to show me the ad.

"What happened to your allowance?" I asked.

"I bought Tanya and her friend ice cream. Leah, boy, oh boy...She's swell," he sighed. "And I bought Judy a pretzel at school. Girls like it when you buy things for them." He nodded.

I nodded too. "Yeah...but don't be such a pushover."

"I'm not." He shook his head. "Judy kissed me for the pretzel...um, I don't like her, but that was the deal. Tanya lifts her shirt for things, and Leah..." He slumped his shoulders. "I just like her."

"What about Chelsea?" I laughed.

"That's my girlfriend, so she gets a ring...I'm not getting her name. It's going to say 'Peanut's Girl' in green."

"Classy," I commented.

"Yeah..."

I pushed him over so I could sit on my bed. "Girls...they get complicated when they get older."

"Who do you like again?" He scrunched his nose. "I like the girl from the gas station." He gasped. "Can I have a dollar? I'll get two. She deserves a ring...'Peanut's Girl' in blue."

"That's Bella, and she most certainly is not _your_ girl." I grabbed the comic book and reached into my pocket with my free hand. "Get one for you, and I want one...have it say 'Angel Face' in red." I slapped the buck in his hand. "But go whine...ask Dad for some cash so I can have my buck back."

"Can I go to the movies with you and Jasper? Dad'll pay, so he can spend time with Mom. They kiss with tongues too," he whispered the last part.

"They do a lot more than that." He's lucky to be in bed and asleep by 9:30.

"Like what?" He frowned. "That's Mommy."

"That's Pop's girl and they're married and old and gross. Don't worry about what they do." I lay back, resting my arms under my head.

"Maybe Dad will wanna get Mom a ring?"

I laughed. "Ask him."

"Um...so, can I go with you and Jasper? He's so cool."

I shrugged, since I'm such a fucking dork. What could it hurt? "Sure...Jasper's mom is driving us, so be ready to go in twenty. And...whine real good, so we can get popcorn."

"Awesome!" He ran from my bedroom, his cape flapping in the wind.

I enjoyed a quiet moment. It was over way too soon because Jared had other plans. He came running back into my room. "Edward!" He jumped on top of me.

I laughed and pushed him off of me.

He landed on the floor with a loud thump. "Pop's got a new car!" He started with a crawl, and then ran out of the room just as fast.

Grumbling, because he has a new one and I never even had one, I followed Jared outside.

In the driveway, there was a black Chrysler Imperial. It was sleek, shiny, and beautiful. "This is great." I pointed. "What year?"

"It's a '56, even so it's not on the lots yet. They're due out the end of March."

"Whoa…" I breathed.

"Edward?"

"Yeah?" I asked.

"It's time you had your own." He tossed me a set of keys, and I warily looked down to them.

"Um…this?" I looked to the car, suddenly panting with an instant erection.

He laughed at me. "No way. You get the Dodge. She's down at Swan's Garage—getting detailed and a wax. She's all yours, son. Treat her well." He patted my back.

I smiled so wide and hugged him tightly.

"You were such a trooper, changing schools without complaint. I'm still young in my career, so when I was offered the Chief of Surgery position I had to take it. You also did well this quarter."

I nodded. "My classes...they seem easier. I don't know why."

"Either way, keep it up and your eyes open. The perfect woman might just be right under your nose, you know? I met your mother while I was a senior in high school. We were married after my first semester at college, the following December after graduation. Then you came along sev-eight, I mean, ten months later—"

My eyes widened. "You-you guys got married because of me? You had sex before marriage?"

"Don't flatter yourself." He tried to wave it off, but I saw him wince. "You were premature, like Peanut at birth. You see, Edward. Sometimes during pregnancy-"

"I'm not judging you, although I do believe you are a very lucky man." I nodded.

"Well, times were tough, but I had a trust fund. My grandfather was smart." He waved a finger.

I rolled my eyes, not wanting to hear about my English grandfather again. Despite him coming to America in 1916, he kept most of his money back in Europe, and deftly avoided the crash of '29.

"Never put all your eggs in one basket, son."

I had heard the story of my parents before, yet my father has never been this forthcoming with certain details. "So...Mom stood by you...raised me and kept house while you studied?"

He placed his hand on my shoulder. "Even if we were settled financially, being so young and raising a family and being so busy with school...was a hardship. But yes, your mother was with me through it all. This is what I mean by goals, Edward. If you set them and strive hard to achieve them, chances are you will." He grinned. "My greatest accomplishment is being a decent father and husband."

"Now who's flattering himself?" I wiggled my brows. "I should go-"

"The Royal has a decent sized backseat, erm..." He rubbed the back of his neck. "We're going to have a chat soon. Not tonight, but-"

"Thanks, Dad!" I tried to stop him before he started a new train of thought. "I should go…" I wasn't even wearing a jacket, but running kept me from freezing.

As fast as I could, I ran down to Swan's. By the time I rounded the corner, I was out of breath, and she was in my sight—they both were. I peeped Bella washing the Royal's windshield.

Her ass looked incredible as it wiggled with her hand movements.

"Hey." I panted.

She stiffened and turned to give me her signature blush. "It's ready."

I nodded, licking my lips. "Thanks." I openly stared at her. It was another day, and she had another dark grease stain on her cheek. "You…" I pointed and closed the distance to try and brush it off with my fingers.

"Oh…I look horrible…working here." She kept her head down.

Hoping I don't look like an ass, I picked her chin up. "I think you're very pretty. And…I like the grease and the uniform." I stopped talking, taking my hand back.

She stared at me wide-eyed with her mouth agape.

"You just—you had—" I touched my own cheek and looked away. "Sorry."

She shook her head and kept her gaze down. "This is an amazing machine." She ran her hand along the hood. "A Royal V8…There were only so many of the convertible models made in '54, did you know that?"

"No." And I noticed that, even though it was freezing, I was burning up—like I was on fire.

"The two-tone, soft-top…it's amazing." She touched the cream coat and then the red, and for all that did for me, she could have been touching my johnson.

I stared at her boobs. "Amazing…They are."

She giggled and started talking horsepower. I muttered that my hips had the same—150 thrusts per…oh, hell, five flicks of my wrist and I'm out.

"What?" She looked at me like I was nuts.

"I'm crazy." I pointed to my head.

"Nice car, Cullen," Emmett came out.

I waved. "Thanks."

"Must be great having Daddy—"

"Cut it out!" Bella shouted at him. "Sorry," she said to me.

Emmett narrowed his eyes, but left us alone.

"He's harmless," Bella told me.

My brows shot up. "Yeah, okay." I looked into the cab, so excited.

"Your father paid in full, so you're good to go." She stepped away from the car.

Squealing under my breath, I entered the car.

"Your first ride…where are you going?" Bella was playing nice. Not only was it a surprise, but it was welcomed. "Plan to go to the cliffs with Tanya?"

"The cliffs?" I asked.

She giggled. "You really are new here."

"I've been here a while now."

"But you've never been to the cliffs?" she asked, looking confused. "_You?_"

"Me, what? No, I've never been there." I was confused now too, but that's what Bella Swan does—she confuses me.

"Oh, well…that's where guys usually take their dates to score. You know, necking...? Everyone goes." She looked away from me.

"And you thought I'd take Tanya?" I laughed.

"It was a joke." She slapped my arm with her rag.

"It wasn't funny." I continued to laugh. "Have you ever been…to the cliffs?"

"This is an awesome car." She pointed.

"Y-you've said that." I frowned, not liking the thought of her at the cliffs. "Have you—have you been?"

She shook her head no. "Never."

"That's great!" Gripping the steering wheel, nothing could wipe the smile off my face now. "Jazz and I are going to the movies—I'm taking my little brother." My ego deflated a little.

"Oh, yeah? Me and Angela are going too." She licked her bottom lip and looked away from me, but then she looked back and stared. "Maybe I'll see you there?"

Emmett gave her a look and then glared at me, which was my cue to leave.

Clearing my throat, I sat up in my seat. "Have a great time." I fired up the engine.

"I bet _Rosalie_ will be glad you have a car."

I shrugged, wondering what Rosalie had to do with anything.

She stuck out her tongue. "She'll probably use you to make him jealous…_again_." Her tone was venomous.

"She didn't—"

Bella laughed. "Of course, not…Miss Stuck-Up is perfect."

I swallowed, not sure what to think. Rosalie had to babysit that night. She was busy that weekend two months ago, but we still talk all the time—albeit when Emmett is nowhere around. But, I've gotten to know Rosalie, and other than the novelty that is her, there's not much there—no depth—just soulless, empty eyes and personality with one killer body.

_Sometimes you gotta take the good with the bad. _

"Take care, Edward." Bella waved behind herself.

Grinning, I drove off and down to Jasper's house.

"This is yours?" He came running out and right into the passenger side. "I can't believe he gave you the Royal…"

"He has a brand new Imperial."

Jasper didn't care. "Let's go! We'll cruise for chicks."

I felt a pang of remorse, but I knew Jared would understand. "I have to go home first." I reversed out of the driveway and sped down to mine. Jasper waited in the car while I went inside.

Once in my bedroom, I combed back my hair and smoothed down my wool jacket. It's almost as cool as leather. And with the white t-shirt and jeans I was wearing now, that was all I was missing.

And the cigarette box folded into my sleeve.

Since I was fourteen, I've worried about my image, never fitting in anywhere, but now I had decided. I have the car, and now I need the jacket.

Then I can go for the girl.

But tonight, I was content to ride around with Jasper. My little brother understood and told me to have a good time.

"Gee" by The Crows played on the radio as we slowed to a crawl by the diner.

Jasper said everyone would be at the drive-in, which is why I opted to go to the actual movie theater. Meanwhile, everyone stops for shakes before making the trek into Port Angeles.

"Ladies!" Jasper shouted, and I came to a stop in front of Rosalie and Alice.

"Whose car is this?" Alice asked.

I pointed to myself.

"Wow, Edward…" Rosalie appraised it. "This is a great car."

I grinned to myself, but didn't let anyone see.

"Need a ride?" Jasper asked Alice. She smiled and went to the passenger side to talk to him. The thing about Alice is she's cool with Jasper, but only when no one is looking—mainly her boyfriend Paul. "Drive-in, right?" he asked her.

I kept my eyes looking out the windshield, going for nonchalance.

"Edward?"

"Yeah?" I tilted my head to Rosalie but didn't look at her.

Jake told me I needed to start acting like an asshole, especially to Rosalie. Apparently, I'm too nice and women like their men to have an edge.

Just then, Bella and Angela Weber, with her thick-framed glasses and dark braids that look like snakes, walked in front of my car.

Bella looked gorgeous, wearing tight jeans and a man's button-down shirt that was tied in the middle. She was showing a lot of skin tonight, which wasn't like her, and she had her hair down and curled. She definitely didn't dress like the other girls did. She had a style all her own, and I hoped Emmett would be close to her tonight. Why was she walking around like that?

_Probably just to torture me._

I wanted to run after her and make her wear my jacket.

My hands itched and twitched, wishing I could touch her smooth belly skin that showed.

I craned my neck to still see her as she entered the diner.

Not once did she look at me, and honking the horn would just be rude.

_An asshole would have done that, and then ignored her. _

Duly noted.

"Hello?" Rosalie asked.

"Huh?" I turned back to her.

From behind her, I was able to see Bella in the window. She was laughing so hard about something and that made me laugh too.

"What is up with you?" Rosalie followed my line of sight. "_Really_?" She sounded surprised about something.

"What?" I shook my head. "What'd you say?" I squirmed in my seat. By now I noticed her breasts were practically in my window—in my fucking face.

_Why was I ignoring her again? _

"Eyes up here, Cullen."

"Oh…" I looked up to Rosalie's frosted face.

"I can't believe…" She turned back to Bella, and so did I. She had taken a seat by the window and was looking at a menu.

Vaguely, I wondered if she was a strawberry shake or the classic chocolate and cheeseburger deluxe chick. "What kind of shake does Bella usually get?" I asked Rosalie.

She hit me.

"What?" I all but shrieked.

She smiled. "Nothing. We're just…hanging out here. Ali, let's go!" She walked around to tear Alice from Jasper.

Then we both watched them enter the diner.

"Hey, Edward!" Tanya skipped to my car. "Can I have a ride home?"

"No," I said.

"It was worth a shot…lover." She batted her eyelashes.

"Wait!" Jasper stopped her and looked to me. "It's like eight o'clock."

"So?" Edward Cullen had no love for Tanya.

Jasper stared at me. "You're going to let her walk home alone?"

"I knew you'd cave." Tanya hopped in and kissed my cheek.

"Don't touch me," I turned to her, "touch me again, and I'm telling your mother. I'm seventeen. I'm a man, and you're a little girl. It doesn't look right."

"So no necking in Eddie's car then?" she laughed. "My mom thinks you're a pervert for dating me and breaking my heart."

**…o.0…**

The following Monday at school, I felt so fucking confident as I drove into the lot. There's no more walking for me. And the sleek, classic style of the Royal quickly grabbed attention.

"Hey, Edward!" Jessica waved, flanked by Lauren. "I saw you cruisin' on Friday."

"Hello, ladies!" Jasper wiggled his eyebrows.

I took off my jacket, not caring if it was cold, and donned my shades, the epitome of cool. Then I looked to Jessica from over the rim of my sunglasses. "You saw me, huh?"

She sighed, staring up at me. "I did…"

The loud roars of many motorcycles sounded. We all turned to watch Emmett and them arrive.

Rosalie was the only one who wasn't wearing a helmet, and Bella was the first to jump off Jimmy's bike. She pushed him and screamed at him for going too fast. And while he laughed at her, she tore off her helmet and threw it back at him.

"Oh, come on, Bells!" he shouted out to her, and I wondered if they were dating.

She gave him the finger.

Once she was out of sight, I reached into the backseat for my books. When I turned, I saw Rosalie swaying her hips and walking into school too. She held my gaze. She stared at me the whole time, but I hoped she couldn't tell I was looking at her specifically—because of the shades.

"Escort you to class?" I asked Jessica.

She was staring where Rosalie entered. "Um…I just remembered…come on, Lauren." She grabbed her friend, and then left us.

"Weird," I said to myself and looked back to Jasper.

"Lauren's got _some_ tits." He held his hand out in front of him.

"Maybe they don't stick around, but I do enjoy watching them walk away." I smiled at my pussy-crazed friend. "You should—" I was cut off by Emmett.

He grabbed a hold of my shirt and pinned me against the wall. "What's this I hear about you creepin' on my sister?"

"Fuck!"

He pulled me away from the wall to slam me back, while I noticed Paul and Jimmy now on either side of him.

"I—I wasn't—" I panted out, fear coursing through me.

"Bullshit!" He kneed me in the stomach and my sunglasses fell from my face.

Paul stepped on my cool shades, making them crunch under his boot, while I tried to catch my breath. "Oops!" he laughed.

"Leave him alone!" Jasper shouted.

"You want some of this, too, Whitlock?" Paul shouted to him.

Jazz put his hands up and backed away.

"Stay away from Alice!" Paul snapped, like an afterthought, back to Jasper.

"And you…" Emmett grinned in my face. "Stay the fuck away from my sister!" He pushed my hunched body onto the ground.

Once they were out of sight, Jasper came over to stare down at me. "You saw how I told them to back off?" he asked, holding out his hand.

He helped me up while I nodded. "Yeah, you're a real pal."

"I had your back, Edward." He patted my shoulder.

Nevertheless, I brushed myself off and went to English class. As soon as I walked into the room, Jimmy cracked a few jokes, and Rosalie fussed over me.

"He can be such a..." She shook her head, rubbing my shoulders.

"I'm good." I shrugged her off.

"He can be such a, what?" Bella snapped.

I heard Rosalie sigh. "He's just...possessive. Edward can't help who he looks at."

My cheeks suddenly felt like they were on fire, and I put my head down.

"Right," I heard Bella say. "What happened?" she asked me.

"Oh, Emmett, um, he—" Rosalie stammered.

"He knocked me in the gut for checking you out." I blurted, but didn't regret it.

"Exactly," Rosalie said.

I turned to see Bella's face covered by her hair. "You're a beautiful girl. I apologize for looking." I felt like I was going to vomit, but I didn't care. Emmett can threaten me and I'll stay away, but I didn't want her to think I was some pervert...even if I kind of am. "Bella?" I asked, after she had yet to look my way. "I'm sorry for staring."

She looked to me confused, and then back to Rosalie.

I tilted my head to Rosalie. "No comment?"

"Um..."

I rolled my eyes and looked to Bella. "S-shame on you for looking so good." I poked her hand.

And then neither one of us said a word for the rest of the period.

While I walked out of class, someone tapped my shoulder. We were already out in the hall, when I turned and looked down to Bella. "Hey," I said.

"Can you tell me what happened?" She looked crazy nervous, but still adorable.

I shook my head. "It's not important."

"It is." She flushed crimson. "To me...it is." She hugged her books close. "I have to know why...from you, like...who you were checking out."

"May I?" I reached for her books, and then Jimmy shoved me back.

"Didn't you learn your lesson this morning?" he asked.

Despite myself and despite being a coward, he was alone, so I grinned at him. "Keep your hands off me."

He laughed, and I looked down to Bella. "Can I walk you to class?"

She smiled, and I opened my mouth to speak, but then I was grabbed by the shoulder. When my body whipped around, I was now faced with Jimmy, Emmett, Paul, and Aaron. Jake watched the scene while leaning against the lockers. Everything inside me wanted to cower, but now I had a point to prove.

That point didn't matter, although I did get a few punches in, while they pounded on my ass.

Jake, Bella, and a few others broke it up; meanwhile, the actual scuffle lasted thirty seconds at best. It happened so fast.

Panting and in so much pain, while I held my jaw and stood up, I couldn't help but laugh. Also, I couldn't keep my gaze on only one of them. "Co-couldn't fight me one-on-one? This wasn't exactly fair." I laughed even harder. It could have been nerves or embarrassment, but I found this to be funny.

Emmett furrowed a brow, just as Jimmy flinched toward me again. Emmett held him back. "Consider this your second warning. You don't want a third."

Squaring my shoulders, I nodded and locked eyes with Paul. "You owe me a pair of shades."

Without another word, I walked to the bathroom where I emptied my stomach into the toilet. From the blow to the gut, from talking and admitting my misdeeds to Bella, from what happened with Emmett and them, I didn't recognize myself or my actions, but I felt really good about myself after.

**Thank you for reading.**

**Some of this stuff was added after it was beta'd, so excuse me if you see any grammatical errors.**

**Please leave me your thoughts. **

**No cool 50s slang this chapter. Well, not words you guys wouldn't know. We still use many of them today.**

**Oh, and I made Carlisle and Esme young parents. Right now, they're probably around 36 years old. It was quite common for people to marry as young as 18 back then, having Edward right away would put them at 36/37, and Carlisle would be pretty young in his career as a surgeon. Um, I'm not sure if medical school and residencies were the same back then, but if they were, then...Carlisle got extremely lucky by being offered the position at Forks. **

**Song:**

**"Gee" by The Crows (Awesome Song) www(dot)youtube(dot)com/watch?v=L8tywIgpP5Q Mind the dots**


	6. Earth Angel

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA. I love you, bb! And I hope you're tearing up Hong Kong! Holla! 是啊 老兄！(that's supposed to say "Yeah, buddy!" in Chinese) Alas, I have no clue what it truly means, so let's hope I didn't offend anyone ;)**

**I hope this link works. Mind the (dot) **** Made in the Shades banner by IllicitWriter bit(dot)ly/nVYlx**

**PLEASE remember that Edward is 17...he's a typical 17 y/o, not our brooding, mature Edward that everyone is used to. **

* * *

><p><em>A man's character may be learned from the adjective which he habitually uses in conversation—Mark Twain<em>

"**Made in the Shades"**

**Chapter Six: Earth Angel**

Rosalie Hale and Bella Swan starred in many of my late night fantasies. Sometimes they'd let me participate; however, I enjoyed watching just as much.

My wrist has been a little sore these days.

I tried to push Bella out of my mind—in public—no matter how much my stomach ached to talk to her sometimes.

Bella says hi and waves to me all the time now. Sometimes I pretend not to see, and when Emmett's not looking, I make sure to wave back. Either way, she makes me tongue-tied, and that's not good for my image.

Ever since I didn't run away and took the beating, I'm looked at like some misplaced tough guy, which is better than being labeled a pussy, but that only—just barely—put me on the map.

People knew we as _something_ now.

Rosalie and I are friends—sort of—we talk and joke, which is so fucking cool—only because that's Rosalie Hale and she's talking to me, social pariah of Forks High School.

During Spring Break, I didn't see anyone besides Jasper and our small clique of friends. It seemed like most families went away. There were only a few of us who stayed behind.

My father had to work, but Mom wanted us to go visit our Aunt down in California. I declined, which made Jared refuse, and so we stayed home. I do regret not going away. Only because I could have lied and made up some great stories about partying in Los Angeles; meanwhile, I would have been hanging around Jared and our little cousins in Alturas, aka Northern Nowheresville.

My car was in the best shape ever, yet my ego was not.

Turns out, the car doesn't make the man. All that time I'd sworn my problems stemmed from having no wheels; however, it didn't.

My problems came from: general lack of coolness and balls.

_"A-Wop-bop-a-loo-lop a-lop-bam-boo_

_Tutti frutti, oh Rudy_

__Tutti frutti, oh Rudy__

___Tutti frutti, oh Rudy___

____Tutti frutti, oh Rudy____

_____Tutti frutti, oh Rudy_____

______A-Wop-bop-a-loo-lop a-lop-bam-boo." ______I turned down the radio, and then put the car in park. It sucks that Swan's Garage is the only gas station in town. Trust me, if I had enough fuel to get to Port Angeles and fill up, I would.

"How can I help you?" Jimmy asked. Luckily, since I am a paying customer, he doesn't give me any shit.

"Three bucks." I handed him the money and waited, while he pumped the gas. Of course, my eyes wandered and landed right on Bella. She was crouched low, putting air in someone's tire. Her ass looked great, as did she with being hunched like that. Then, I don't know what happened. As if she felt me staring, she turned to smile at me.

I grinned back and discreetly lifted my hand. "Hi." I mouthed.

"Hi." She waved and smiled wider, and then went back to what she was doing.

"You're good to go," Jimmy said.

I nodded to him, and then waved to Bella once more before I drove off.

Mom was busy cooking when I entered the kitchen to graze. After looking in the refrigerator, I started on the cabinets.

"No snacks?" I asked.

She sighed. "Dinner will be ready in an hour...I moved a few things over to the pantry, but I don't want you to spoil your supper."

"Oh...well, can I have some cash? I wanted to go to Port Angeles and buy some clothes." I waited, hoping like hell she'd cave.

"What do you need? Your clothes are just fine." She dropped some potatoes into a pot of water.

"Um...just new stuff."

She turned to raise an eyebrow. "Your father doesn't like it when I give you money."

"I need clothes-"

"No, you don't."

"Fine...I'm just bored." I slumped my shoulders. "There's also this jacket I wanted."

She looked torn, like she wanted to give in but also listen to my father. He says I make too many frivolous purchases; meanwhile, I only buy records. Sadly, my mother buys all my clothes, and I'm never with her when she does. I'm a good kid, and I always wear whatever she buys. Sometimes, if I want something specific, we'll go out together.

"Don't worry about," I whispered.

"The lawn could use a mow..." She trailed off.

I nodded, actually glad she gave me something to do. "I'll get right on it."

"And...you can water my flower bed. Then...soon, we'll see about that jacket." She winked.

I shook my head. "It's okay." I gave her a kiss on the cheek before I left the kitchen.

Peanut was thrilled to have something to occupy his time as well. I got busy mowing the lawn, while Jared raked up the leaves and cut-grass.

Dad was also impressed by our hard work. We were finished, and he came home right on time for dinner.

After Peanut and I washed up, we raced down to the dinner table, starving.

"How was your day?" Dad asked me.

With a mouthful of steak, I shrugged my shoulders.

"You have another week of spring break left." He placed some food into his mouth. I continued to eat while I waited for him to speak again. "You can always come to work with me...be a volunteer? They can use able-bodied people to help around with things-"

"Carlisle...I don't think-"

"Esme." Dad hedged. "I don't want him sitting around and doing nothing."

Mom nodded.

My lips drew a tight-line while my head went back and forth between them. "What were you saying, Mom...before you were rudely interrupted?" I asked.

"Edward..."

I stared at my mother, waiting for her to continue despite my father. She slightly shook her head no and went back to her food.

I sighed and did the same.

"Monday you can start...this way, you have a few more days to yourself. They need help with transporting patients around the hospital." Dad smiled.

"That sounds great," I whispered.

"You might have fun...meet new people?" Mom grinned and squeezed my hand.

I squeezed hers back. "Yeah...fun."

Today was another boring day without school. Believe it or not, I've been so bored that I actually miss school. Maybe volunteering wouldn't be so bad.

When I was finished eating, I excused myself. Once in my room, I grabbed a few hot books, and then got back in bed. Mom said she'd call me when_ I Love Lucy_ came on, so we could all watch. I had twenty minutes until the program started.

"Edward!" Jasper shouted from outside my bedroom window.

"Shit." I hissed, putting my dick away.

With nothing to do, you bet it was in my hand.

"What?" I looked down to him.

"Ben's parents are in Seattle for the night."

"So?" I was perfectly content to go back to bed and jerk off.

"So…?" He widened his arms in the dark. "Booze, broads…he's having a party."

_Hey, all you Chickie babies, Cool cats, Greasers, and Motor heads. Put on your best threads, lose the squares, and get ready to head to fat city for the biggest bash of the weekend. Let's get cranked and have a blast!_

Even if I conjured all of that in my own head, it sounded good to me. "Give me five minutes," I shouted down to him.

Lightning fast, I combed my hair and got ready to go. This could be the night. Maybe Rosalie would be there. She never misses a party. Sadly, I rarely see Bella out unless she's at one of the hangouts or the garage. And Ben isn't in the same circle as Emmett…

I just hoped Emmett wouldn't be there and that one of my girls would.

My head was a mess as I took the steps three at a time. I came to a stop in the living room. My parents were watching television and Jared sat between them.

"I'm going out."

"Shhh—I'm watching. Charles Boyer is guest starring." Dad waved me away. "HA!" He let out a loud cackle. As long as that crazy redhead is on television, I can get away with practically anything.

Smiling, I turned quickly.

"Edward." My mother.

I stopped short.

"Behave."

"Always do," I lied and raced out to Jasper.

He closed the distance as I was closing the door. "This could be the night."

"For what?" We started down the walkway.

"Alice?"

"Oh." I nodded.

"Aren't we taking your car?"

I stared at him confused. "Ben lives four houses down."

Jasper whined, thinking I might let him drive the small distance so he could make an entrance.

Nevertheless, we wouldn't have made any grand gesture. When we arrived at Ben's house, Peter was there.

And that's it.

"Welcome!" Ben jumped onto his sofa.

"Where is everyone?" I asked.

"Get in!"

I turned to see Jake pushing us inside. He still hangs with us, and he still hangs with Emmett. The only difference is Jake doesn't have a bike.

_Motorcycles don't have backseats._

"I didn't know you were coming," Jasper said to him.

"There ain't dick else to do." He went right for the wet bar. "What's up, _Fuckward_?"

I smiled at my new nickname, even though I hated it. Paul, Alice's boyfriend, made it up, and it seems to be sticking.

"Close the door." Peter waved.

"Righto." I locked it behind me, and then took off my jacket.

Music played in the background and everyone got busy mixing drinks. Besides a beer on occasion when Dad is being boss, I had never imbibed alcohol.

"What'll ya have?" Ben asked.

My brows rose. "Whatever you're having is fine."

"Hey, Pete!" Jake shouted.

Peter took a drag from his cigarette and gave Jake his attention.

"Call some babes—we need some pussy in here." Jake tossed Peter his little black book.

Peter skimmed through it. "There's nothing but sluts in here."

"That's what we want—sluts!" Jasper shouted.

"I only hang with fast chicks," Jake muttered.

Suddenly eager, I looked to Jake. "Can I see that book when he's done?" I asked, wanting to know who was listed.

"No sweat." Jake smirked and looked back to Peter. "Start at 'L' and work your way down to 'Z'."

Before I could ask why he was to start at L, a drink was thrust in my face. I smiled while I took the full glass from Ben. "Thanks." I took a huge gulp. It was strong and burned as it went down. "Smooth—very smooth." I gasped.

With my drink in hand, I sat on the couch and sipped. The more I drank, the easier it went down. Jasper kept talking tits, ass, and cars, while Peter and Ben took turns horning some girls.

"How was work?" I asked Jake.

"Same shit, different car." He chugged a beer. "You should bring yours by. We'd love to get under that hood again." He shook his head.

Looking down, I wondered if they'd ruin my car.

"Working on a Royal rag top…I spoke to your father after Bells did when he came to the garage…Emmett and Jimmy fought me for it," he explained. "All we did was slap a coat of wax on and give her a tune up, but if you want we can goose her up for you."

"Really?" I smiled like a moron.

He nodded. "It'll cost you some bread, but…just think of how awesome it would be."

"It would be." I became excited. "I don't know anything about cars."

"Just treat the Royal like you would a fine woman and not some junk heap."

"Oh…" I had no idea how to treat any kind of woman. "How's, um, the Swans…they didn't go away. I saw Bella earlier. Is she enjoying her vacation?"

"Are you writing a book?" he asked.

I shook my head no. "Sorry."

"Hey," he slapped my back, "don't apologize—don't ever be sorry. Just say what you mean."

I nodded.

"No, they obviously didn't go away," he sighed.

"That's swell…I can bring my car over tomorrow."

"I don't work tomorrow."

"Does Bella?"

Jake laughed at me. "You on the hook?"

My eyes widened. "Um, no?"

"Sounds like it." He shook his head.

"I just—I don't get it…" I groaned. "Most kids our age date, and yet Bella can't even talk to boys," I mumbled, looking down.

Jake patted my back. He was being very soothing and nice this evening, what he has been since the altercation I had with his friends. "You're missing the point. You know what's in your head all the time…if you had a little sister, would you let her date someone like you?"

"Um…you let people watch your sister bathe." I hiccupped.

He laughed. "My big sister's a loose-goose who likes to make my life miserable, and so I make a buck here and there."

"Oh." I nodded, even if that still made no sense to me.

"Emmett's no odd ball." Jake sipped his beer. "I heard him tell Bella that when the right guy came along, said guy wouldn't let Emmett stop him from dating her…Do you understand, _Fuckward_?"

"No."

"If you want the girl, you have to go for it, no matter who her brother is." He rolled his eyes. "Fuck Emmett _and_ Rosalie—forget about them—and go for it. Trust me, a classy chassis isn't worth the trouble, but Bella is . . . Who are you up to?" he asked Peter.

"Lauren," he whispered.

"No, skip her," Jake laughed. "I just saw her yesterday." He let out something that sounded like a giddy-giggle.

"Drink this—I just made it." Jasper handed me a green drink. Since my second drink was finished, I took a hefty sip of Jasper's concoction. It was gross, but I didn't give a fuck at this point.

When Jake lit a cigarette, I stared. "Hey, c-can I have one of those?" I swallowed my slur.

He tossed me the pack of Lucky Strikes and his Zippo. "I didn't know you burned."

I shrugged, placing one in my mouth. "I don't." After taking a long drag, I coughed and almost vomited on the carpet.

"Drink!" Jasper patted my back.

Then I chugged my third drink, which went straight to my head. I still smoked the cigarette, though.

Alistair, some cat from the baseball team who I don't talk to, came by shortly after.

"Did you see any chicks on your way over?" Jasper asked him.

He jerked his thumb behind him. "I just saw Alice and Rosalie—told them to come by."

Jasper stomped his foot. "Rosalie and Alice…Rosalie and Alice!" He turned back to me. "Do you know what this means?"

At this point I didn't know what anything meant, but I laughed at Jasper anyway. "Does that mean Bella's coming?" I slurred.

"They're back from the lake!" Jasper jumped up and down. "Oh, man…I hope they come."

"I hope I come, too." I grinned, thinking about jizzing in Rosalie's mouth or hair just to fuck it up, or maybe on Bella's ass. She's got a great ass. And I'd peel off her bobby socks—I love those little white socks, especially on her.

"Christ!" Jake punched my arm. "Bella's like my little sister. Now you got me thinking about that shit."

Surprised, I tried to clear my head by shaking it. "I said that out loud?"

Jasper and Alistair nodded.

I winced. "Sorry." And then I grabbed onto Jake's arms. "Don't tell Emmett—he'll pound my head into pepperoni!"

Jake pushed me away. "Fuckward…listen to me. Fuck. Emmett."

I nodded.

"Do you understand?"

"Why are you helping me?" I asked.

"'Cause I'm a big ol' pussy like that." He winked.

I patted his shoulder. "Oh, don't say that."

He pushed me. "Don't touch me."

"Sorry." I sat back.

"Yeah…Jake's cool." Jasper saluted Jake with his drink.

"I've never been drunk before." I swallowed back some vomit.

"Mrs. Zackey!" Peter shouted. "Is Carla home?" He paused. "Oh…she's busy…well, what are _you_ doing tonight?. . .Sorry to hear that. Tell Carla, Jack Kerouac called. That's right, Jack—" He snickered, and then looked to the receiver. "She hung up on me." Peter sounded surprised.

Jasper passed me a bottle, and I took a sip.

"So?" Jake asked Peter.

"So…I made twelve calls," he tossed the book back, "and nobody's coming."

Jake rolled his eyes and placed another cigarette in his mouth. "I'll catch you guys later."

"Wh-where are you going…to see Bella?" I swallowed. "I—take me with you, so I can…talk to her."

"Cool your jets…I can't take you any—" Jake laughed. "I should…nah, you're all goopy. Sit tight." He stood up. "So long…" He waved, and then he left the living room.

I sat back while the room started to spin.

"Dammit…" Jasper shook his head and passed me the bottle.

Waving my hand, I declined. "I can't." I felt kind of sick, kind of amazing, and like I might die. "Is this normal?" I looked to Jasper.

"I don't know." He sadly sipped from the bottle. "It's normal for us."

"Oh…" I closed my eyes again.

"We never catch any breaks," Ben said.

"Looks like it's one more bash with the boys," Peter grumbled.

"This shit is going to turn into another dick measuring contest." Ben again.

My eyes shot open. "Dick what?"

"Don't be upset." Jasper smiled. "It's not our fault you always lose," he told Ben.

"I miss Bella," I whispered.

"We go back to school next week. You'll live…" Jasper's face fell. "I miss Alice."

"Angel face." I hugged myself, feeling so down. "_Earth Angel…Earth Angel…will you—would you be miiiine…_" I wailed. _"My dar-darling dear…lov-love you all the time…"_

"Have another drink." Ben passed me something. "This is supposed to be a party."

"You!" I pointed at him, "are correct." Smiling, I took a few sips, and then I jumped to my feet. _"__Well, be-bop-a-lula, she's my baby."_ Wanting to dance and feeling it in my bones, I did just that. _"Be-bop-a-lula!"_ I jumped onto the couch.

"_Be-bop-a-lula, I don't mean maybe,"_ Jasper sang.

"_Be-bop-a-lula, she's my baby. __Be-bop-a-lula, I don't mean maybe."_ I screamed with Jasper. _**"**__Be-bop-a-lula, she's my baby love. __My baby love, my baby love…"_ I finished and collapsed back on the couch. _"…my baby love…angel love." _

Even when I closed my eyes, my head still managed to spin.

**(-_o)** zZzZz

Things were a little fuzzy and different music played when I came to. My eyes were unfortunately looking at everyone's bare asses. Their pants were pooled around their ankles and they all stood in a circle.

"Four and two-sixteenths." Ben held up a ruler.

"…the fuck," I mumbled, staring and wondering what the hell they were doing.

"Five and a quarter." Jasper passed the ruler to Peter.

I stood up. "Hey!" I shouted.

"Hey!" Alistair sang. "Look who woke up…It's Fuckward!"

"Did-did Rosalie and-and Alice come by?" I asked, feeling like my feet were heavy and glued to the carpet. "What about my baby, angel face?" I whimpered.

Ben laughed. "You missed it. Rosalie gave everyone a hand job except you."

"What?" Tears welled up in my eyes.

"She let Tanya do yours . . . don't you remember?" Peter asked.

"No!" My heart stopped and I was dying.

"We're just joshing ya!" Jasper laughed. "No, no one came by."

Still drunk, I stumbled over to the piano and sipped from the bottle of rum. "Smooth," I gasped, "real smooth." And I had no idea why I kept saying that. Maybe my father says that when he drinks. I don't know. "Anyone wanna hear some tunes…?" I played a few broken keys. "I can tickle the ivories…the 88, but—" I held up a finger. "I've never tickled some tits..." While laughing manically, I almost fell back. "…the fuck."

"Join us," Jasper said as he pulled up his pants.

I shook my head no. "I want to make a toast!" I put the bottle in the air. "To…buddies and bobby socks!"

My pals cheered me on and agreed. "To Fuckward!" they shouted in unison.

"…me not being the new kid anymore…yay!" And I collapsed back onto the piano bench.

.

.

.

.

.

.

**¯\(°_°)/¯**

"Edward?" An angel said. "You should get up." She touched my ass.

I grinned, reaching for her. "You like the cock…" All I caught was air, so I hugged myself, but still wore a wide smile.

"What?" Bella screeched.

I opened my eyes, and then shielded them from the light. "Oh my God…" Wanting to die from the pain and embarrassment, I held my head with hopes the earth might swallow me.

"Why are you out here?"

When I looked up to Bella, it looked as though she had a halo around her head from the sun shinning behind her. She was dressed for work, but had her hair down.

I swallowed and grabbed her ankle, wondering if she was real. If she wasn't, things could get interesting. Then I remembered myself, after I managed to give her an electric shock.

"Ouch. . . Are you okay? You're acting…strange." She stepped away from me.

And that's when I realized I was on my lawn. "Um…" I leaned back on my palms, my head killing me. "I'm fine?"

"You look like crap."

I grinned with my eyes clamped shut. "And you look gorgeous…as always." I think I was still a little drunk. "Where are you headed?"

"Some of us work. . ." She took another step back. "Golly…I can smell you from here."

I tried to get up. On the first attempt I didn't make it, but Bella came to my aid and helped me.

"Thanks."

"So…where were you last night?" She looked up to me.

I trailed my hand through my hair, and didn't want to tell her the truth. _"Gee, Bella, I spent the night getting hammered, going in and out of consciousness. And guess what? My flaccid cock is bigger than all my friend's." _

"Edward?"

I gave her my best smirk, despite the headache. "Me and a few people…well, me and Jasper met a few of my old friends from Seattle. We did a bar crawl. Th-that's when you visit a lot of bars—it was pretty heavy."

_What? It's not like we hang out with the same people. _

Except Jake.

_Fuuuuck!_

She grinned. "That's really cool."

I'm a moron, so I kept going. "We were going to check out this one club...a jazz club, but...it wasn't really our scene."

"That's, wow, that's nice." She stepped closer to me.

I nodded, feeling my brain swoosh back and forth. "It was a blast." I stumbled back, but righted myself quickly.

"You're a pretty far-out guy . . . you know that?" Her cheeks flushed crimson and she licked her bottom lip. "Sorry…I…um…I should go." She pointed down the street.

"You walk by here every morning?" I asked.

"Yeah…I live down that way, on Elm." She pointed to her left. "This is the easiest way to the garage. Why?" Her voice was so soft with no malice. Her lips were so full and her eyes were so pretty.

If I just stepped forward and grabbed her—pinned her against the side of my house, would she tell Emmett?

_What, that you attacked her in your backyard? Most likely. _

More and more these days it seems my hormones are growing too bold for my body. Curious and too embarrassed to speak to my father, I secretly hung out at the library and read the _Guidebook for a Healthy Life_. It spoke about the mechanics of sex, and how premarital intercourse cheapens young love and makes it confusing.

All it did was turn me on.

I'm usually confused already, so . . .

_If only I could find someone to lower the standard of decency with. _

Then again, my problems could stem from masturbation. According to the book: _Individuals, who indulge in this practice, often develop serious emotional problems and feelings of inferiority. A good way to solve the problem is through engaging oneself in a hobby._

Shifting where I stood, I winced. Masturbation is my only hobby.

"Edward?"

I shook my head. "Every day at this time, you walk along here...alone?" I looked to my watch to see that it was missing from my wrist. "Crap…What time is it?" I noticed my father's car in the driveway.

"Just after seven—"

"What time does Emmett go in?" I inquired, looking up and down the street.

She rolled her eyes at me. "Emmett…of course."

"Wait…what were you saying before?" My eyes went to her breasts. Her coveralls were open and she wore a white t-shirt. Her nipples were pointing directly at me, saying hello.

And now I knew what I'd be doing for the rest of the day.

I'll be jacking off to that.

Bella was biting her lip now as she stared at me, which means she knew what I was looking at. Fuck. My eyes went back to hers, and I smiled.

She let out a small laugh and covered her mouth, but not her tits.

"Sorry…you were saying?" I raised a brow.

"When there's no school I hang out all day…I mean, I work." She hugged herself as she shivered.

Quickly, I eased out of my jacket. "Here."

She put her hands out. "You're giving me your jacket? I mean…you want me to wear it?"

My eyes widened. Jocks usually give babes their lettermans as a sign of commitment. Does that count for a loner engaging a greaser's sister? _Would_ she take my jacket if offered? Too bad the thought of her declining was too much to bear at this early hour.

"Oh!" I shouted. "It's not like that. . . You're cold." I held it out to her. "Just give it back later or something."

"It's okay." She gave me a small smile. "Feel better." Bella was leaving. She was upset now. Her voice had changed and her shoulders were slumped.

"Bella…It's not about going steady. I didn't mean I didn't want to. It's just…I would, but…yeah. I just—I—fuck…" I blew out a breath, staring at the grass now.

"You…_fuck_?" she whispered and winked.

And I had never heard a girl say that before. It was perverse and really sexy.

"I _can_…" I blurted and slapped my face.

She giggled. It sounded like bells and her eyes twinkled.

"You're so pretty," I mumbled, dropping my own shoulders in defeat.

"What?" she asked, stepping off the grass and onto the sidewalk.

"Nothing…have a great day." I waved.

She waved back, and I watched as she walked down the block with a little bounce to her step.

Facing the front door, I felt really good about myself. When there's no school, she passes my house to get to the garage in the mornings. Now that was something to look forward to.

"Get in here!" My father pulled me into the house by my ear.

"Ow-ow-ow!" I cried, like a little girl.

"That was horrible out there." He pushed me onto the couch.

"What?" I looked to him confused, thinking I might be in trouble for staying out all night. "I just went to get you the paper," I lied.

He looked to my hands.

"I forgot."

Dad shook his head at me and huffed a breath. "I told your mother to go to sleep last night when she insisted on waiting up for you. When we're through here, you're to take a bath and go straight to bed...take a packet of aspirin too."

"Thank you." I blew out a breath.

"I heard you on the lawn a few hours ago…you sang yourself to sleep."

"You couldn't come get me?" I asked.

"I was comfortable and…well, it's not like anything could happen to you on the lawn. Let's just hope the neighbors don't gab about your early morning performance to your mother."

"Crap."

"Now on to more pressing matters…" He stared at me. "Son," Dad sat on the arm of the couch, "is that how you speak to women?"

My thighs hugged my forearms. "Um…"

"And what's this _'um'_ business? I didn't raise you to be such a cad." He scoffed. "And sit up straight." He smacked the back of my head. "Now talk to me. What is going on in that head?" He knocked on it.

"Nothing." I hugged myself now, feeling pitiful and vulnerable.

"Edward, there's no judgment here. Please, son. I'd like to know."

"Dad…" I pursed my lips. "All I think about is girls…doing things with them, and the word 'fuck', so other thoughts kind of fade away _when_ a girl is around."

He waved his hand. "You're seventeen. Being doll dizzy is normal, but you need help."

From there, my father gave me a lecture about how to talk to women. Even with the hangover, I absorbed a lot, but doubted I'd ever use any of the skills he taught me.

Most of all, he stressed the importance of thinking before speaking.

**Thank you for reading. **

**Please leave me your thoughts. **

**Goopy – messy**

**Rag top – convertible **

**Bread – money**

**Boss – great**

**Horning – calling**

**Classy chassis (pronounced chassie)– nice body**

**On the Hook - in love**

**Doll dizzy - girl crazy (40s term, and something Carlisle would use)**

**Songs:**

**Earth Angel - The Penguins**

**Be-bop-a-lula - Gene Vincent**

**Tutti Frutti - Little Richard**

* * *

><p><strong>Fic Recs: (they're obviously present day)<strong>

**"Still" by CeCiVrn www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/7450975/1/Still (her fanfic debut. It's going to be EPIC!)**

**"The Slowest Burn" by Typokween www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/7076900/1/The_Slowest_Burn (I'm obsessed with this one, and Friday is now my new favorite day of the week) E/B. WIP.**

**"Inside Man" by Ooza www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/7043140/1/Inside_Man E/B. WIP. **

**"Albertine" by E's My Brand of Heroin www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/6614476/1/**

**"Multitude of Sins" by LvTwilight www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/7411404/1/ fucking PriestWard**

**"The Lucky Ones" by Deebelle1 www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net/s/7125370/1/The_Lucky_Ones E/B. WIP**


	7. He's Got It

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**IMPORTANT! HUGE A/N: Okay, so...this isn't the "normal" Edward sees Bella and vows his love for eternity fic. He's 17, and so he's going to act 17 or maybe 9...LOL. The innocence of the time, plus being true to form, leaves Edward being very immature and horny - the boy is overrun by his hormones and, let's face it, he's desperate. *giggles***

**The saying is also true: as the years have gone by, we've matured faster**—**sexually and intellectually. Most 17 y/o's nowadays act like they're 20 or something. Anyway...moving on...**

**We'll get there, I promise. Until then, please have a chuckle and try to enjoy his fuckery. This is a coming of age story, and so there will also be heart fail later on. Edward will NOT be the same person he was in the beginning toward the end. Sorry for the spoiler. However, you'll still find yourself laughing at Edward anyway.**

**Oh, and I don't have a posting schedule for this. Chapters will post whenever, but there won't be week(s) between updates. **

* * *

><p><em>Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often —Mark Twain<em>

"**Made in the Shades"**

**Chapter Seven: He's Got It**

"D-did y-you see those hips?" Jasper asked.

I nodded dumbly, still staring straight ahead.

"I-I-wow." My buddy clawed at the neck of his sweater.

"Crazy wow," I said, suddenly feeling overheated myself.

"Are we going to sit here all night?" Peanut asked. "The movie's over." He pointed to the screen.

"Um..." I swallowed. "D-did you see...?"

Peanut bopped me on the back of my head. "Yes, Jayne Mansfield has nice hips. Can we go?"

"Yeah..." I looked around us for the first time and saw that the movie theater had cleared out some time ago. "The lips...that face. You know who she reminds me of?"

"Hale," Jasper finished.

"Yes." I rasped, while standing and covering my erection with my jacket. "_She's Got It_."

"What's wrong with you?" Peanut's voice was shaky, and he looked concerned.

"I'm in love...I feel feverish and-and alive...um." After trailing my hand through my hair, I had to take a seat again.

"I don't know who I love more, Marilyn or Jayne," Jasper said.

"I thought you liked Alice?" Peanut asked.

"Oh, we can all get something going." Jasper slumped back.

"Huh?" Jared's head kept whipping between us. "You guys are kookie."

We were allotted another five minutes of quiet, before Jared started to usher us out of the theater. When fresh air hit us, and I was faced with the daunting task of driving, I woke from my stupor. "Did you see those hips?" I turned to Jasper.

He nodded, still looking stoic. "We need women like that, not these little girls with attitudes. We need actual women."

"Yeah," I agreed. "Women that can make men out of us."

"Edward?"

"What?" I turned to Jared.

"Can we go home?"

"Okay." I started the car, and we pulled away from the curb. Now I was eager to go home and jack my dick, and so I sped the whole way back to Forks. We were quiet for most of the ride, until we hit the town limits of Forks.

"Edward...um, there's a police officer behind us. He keeps flashing the bright lights," Jared said.

After blinking a few times, I looked down to the speedometer to see that I was doing sixty-five in a forty-five. "Shit." Tapping the brakes, I hoped the officer was only trying to warn me.

I was wrong, because as soon as I slowed down he made the sirens blare.

"I can't go to jail!" Jasper sounded panicked.

"Cool it!" I groaned, driving over and stopping on the shoulder.

"What's happening?" Jared asked.

Taking deep breaths, I tried to calm myself down. "I was going too fast," I whispered. "I remember when Dad got one of these. I'm going to get a ticket-" I was cut off when there was a knock on the window.

Rapidly, I rolled it down, and then blanched back when a flashlight came to shine in my eyes. "Y-yes?" I asked, lowing my hand.

Now that the light was gone, I was able to see a tall, middle aged male. He had a black mustache like Ernest Hemingway, which was a little odd. I'd never seen a man with styled facial hair who wasn't famous or playing a role. "Do you have any idea how fast you were going, son?"

"Um..." I didn't want to admit the truth—admit fault—or lie for fear of. . . something, like he might know of my dishonesty.

"I know you were going over the limit. I had to gun it to sixty...just to keep up with you." He bent low to lean his forearms on the door. "Mr. Whitlock." He nodded to Jasper.

"How-how do you do, Chief Swan?" He gulped.

"Ch-Chief Swan?" I was much more nervous now. I hadn't even mustered the guts to ask Bella out on a date yet, and now he'll never let her go with me, even if she—in my wildest dreams—wanted to. "Um...I-I apologize."

"What's your name?" he asked.

"Ed-Edward Anthony Cullen."

The side of his mouth turned up, and he looked away from me. "I'll tell you what, Edward. How about you promise me that you'll never speed again, and I won't give you a ticket?" He raised a brow, and I couldn't believe how nice he was being. If Emmett was any consolation, I would have thought Chief Swan an ogre, someone you wouldn't want to mess with.

"I swear." I nodded. "N-never again."

"Good man." He squeezed my shoulder. "I will be telling your father, though."

"Oh..." My shoulders dropped.

"Next time..." Chief Swan stood straight, but still stared down at me. "I'll haul your ass in—a night in the can'll set ya straight. I bet you'll never-ever speed after that."

"I won't be speeding ever again now...with the warning, sir," I promised. "Honest."

"Where were you boys coming from?" He shined the light in the backseat. "Who's this?"

"Jared Carlisle Cullen, sir." Peanut put his hand out. Chief Swan shook it, smiling down at him. "Pleased to make your acquaintance," he said.

"Like wise." Chief Swan looked back to me.

"We came from the cinema," I said.

He nodded. "Oh, yeah...the new Jayne Mansfield flick." He whistled. "I heard it was funny."

"It was," I agreed.

"Some hips on that broad..." He crouched to look at Jasper. "Deep breaths, Whitlock. I'm not haulin' you guys in." He chuckled and stood to pat my shoulder. "Take it easy, Edward. I'll tell Bella you said hello?"

"Oh...please...um, don't tell her. I don't want her to think bad of—I-I, um...please don't tell her?" I pleaded.

He stared at me for a moment. "You got it." Without another word, he walked back to his police car, while I breathed a sigh of relief.

**...o.0...**

She's always by the nurses' station, swaying her hips as she looks over a chart. Shelly Cope might be my mother's age, but she's still very attractive. Nurse Cope is portly, and yet has an hourglass figure, hair as black as night, crimson lips, and a face like Vivien Leigh. She has these skinny little lines for eyebrows that are always quirked in question.

Her body moved to the soft jazz that played; meanwhile, she had a rhythm all her own, one that didn't go with the music.

"Edward?" She always catches me staring, even if her back is turned to me. "Mr. Smith would like some ice water."

"Me, too," I mumbled, suddenly thirsty.

"Excuse me?"

"Right away." I walked around her to grab a small pitcher. After filling it with water, some ice, and grabbing a glass, I walked them into Mr. Smith's room. He's been here for ages, as per my father. I have no idea what's wrong with him, but he looks about three-hundred years old.

"What do you want?" Mr. Smith asked.

"Just...giving you your water, sir." I placed it down on his side table.

"I wish I was dead already," he grumbled.

"That's great," I sighed and left his side, going back to the nurses' station. Today was my last day of volunteering until, Dad says, the summer time. Either way, I couldn't wait to go back to school.

I missed seeing that angel face every day.

A set of Jayne Mansfield hips and a Vivien bitch brow are nice on occasion, but I missed Bella's face.

"He's so handsome, just like his father." That was my cue to grin and lean into Shelly, so she could pinch my cheek. She could do a lot more than pinch my cheek. I'll take other things, like...she can shove her tits in my face or maybe her ass.

"So handsome." And then Shelly's partner in crime, Mrs. Stanley—who's also a nurse—rubbed up my shoulder. It turns out, Jessica's mother is just as forward as she is. Jessica resembled her mother, with her ashy-brown curly hair and pretty face, but Nurse Stanley looked much older than my mother and Shelly.

"Ladies," Dad greeted, taking a chart from the counter. "Edward...you're staying out of trouble, I hope." He grinned, and yet it felt as though he was silently communicating with me.

"He's a doll!" Nurse Stanley gave me a pat on my ass, which made me jump as a squeal escaped me.

"He sure is." Shelly winked.

And then I watched them walk away. "Hey..." I widened my arms, staring after them.

"They have to work, Edward. They can't fawn over you all day."

Dropping my shoulders, I turned back to my father. "They touch and then go...why can't they touch...some more?" I was mainly speaking to myself, but my father found it funny.

"They're just being flirtatious. No harm, no foul."

"I want harm...they can be foul. One of 'em should make a man out of me," I sighed.

"Oh, Edward..." Dad shook his head. "You're adorable."

"How..." I trailed my hand through my hair.

"Go home. You have school tomorrow. And remember, you're grounded until Friday." He waved a finger. "No cruising or whatever it is you do."

"But I only got a warning."

"Still...next time, I'll just take your keys away. Now go home."

And after watching—spying on—Shelly Cope while she smoked a cigarette in the lounge, I did.

"Heading out?" Mrs. Stanley asked.

I nodded, walking toward my car.

"My husband was supposed to pick me up..." She kicked some gravel, and then righted her white cap. "He must have forgotten—knows I get off at four."

"Di-did you..." I pointed to the Royal, "need a ride?"

She beamed at me. "Oh...would you? I hope it's no trouble."

"None at all." I hoped she'd take advantage of me in some way.

And I was so ready for anything. We weren't at the hospital. My father wasn't around, and all those boundary lines don't exist in my car. "Thank you, Edward." She grinned.

I was fast to get the door for her and help her inside. After entering and starting the car, I pulled off and headed back toward Main Street. Mrs. Stanley gave me directions to her house, but she didn't make any small talk or try to touch me. It was confusing, and I scooted a little closer to give her a hint.

I mean, she flirts constantly and is always touching me. That means she's interested, right?

"I'm just right up this street." She pointed to Laurel Avenue.

Nodding, I turned right, wondering if this was my last shot. "You're married...um..." I didn't know what else to say, but I'm horny, desperate, and young. So, her marital status didn't mean much to me, even though it should.

"I am." She was short.

"And...your husband just forgot? If my wife—if I had a wife—and she was as b-beautiful as you...um, I'd never forget her," I stammered, while my heart was beating a million times a minute.

She laughed. "You're sweet."

"I am..." I licked my lips. "So...w-what are you doing this evening?"

As I pulled up to the curb, I felt her eyes boring into my profile. "D-did I say something wrong?" I faced her.

She slowly shook her head no. "...if I was twenty years younger," she sighed.

"Oh!" I shouted, excited. "Age is just a number."

"Are you hitting on me?" She raised a brow.

"What if I was?" My cheeks felt like they were on fire. "I'm sorry, um—"

"Marcy," she said.

"Huh?" I looked to her confused. "Ma'am, I apologize for—"

She leaned over, and I held my breath while she kissed my cheek. "Thank you, Edward."

"F-for?" I managed to get out.

She winked. "For making this old lady feel beautiful." She touched my cheek, and then left my car.

Looking out the windshield, I couldn't figure out what I had done wrong—how things took such a terrible turn. My plan was to seduce her, so she could have her wicked way with me and turn me into a man.

On my way home, I drove past Swan's Garage—slowing down to a crawl with the hopes of seeing Bella. Sadly, she was nowhere in sight, and so I went straight home.

**...o.0...**

On a rainy, Tuesday afternoon, I locked myself in my bedroom with my hot books. Flipping through the nude comics of robust women, I snaked my hand down my briefs and sat back.

"Hmm, Bella…No, Rosalie…" I closed my eyes, thinking of her because I never feel guilty when I think about that attention whore.

"Edward!" Jasper shouted.

Gritting my teeth, I stroked my dick and hoped to ignore him.

"Edwaaard!" He drew out my name. "Come on, it's raining!"

"It's always raining," I whispered to myself. My hard-on came anyway, and I got to pounding. Maybe I could get one in before my mother realizes he's outside.

Panting with my eyes still closed, the image of Rosalie spread under me, with her big tits in my face, kept changing. It'd go from Bella's ankles—those little white socks—grease stains, and back to a naked Rosalie. "Shit." I opened my eyes and redoubled my efforts, looking to the book.

"Thanks, Mrs. Cullen." Jasper tried my doorknob, and then the door gave way.

My parents' bedroom and the bathrooms are the only doors with locks on them. I don't pay bills and do not deserve privacy. So when I say I locked my door, that means I propped a chair behind it.

I groaned, putting my dick away and placing my book under my pillow. "Gimme a sec." I hopped into the jeans I wore today.

Still shirtless, I moved the chair and let Jazz in. "What?"

"Beating off to Hale?"

"Shh!" I spat and pulled him into my room to close the door. "Did you get any new hot books?" I asked, plopping down on my bed. He wore the biggest smile, and I couldn't figure out why.

He shook his head. "You'll—you'll never believe what happened."

"Well, tell me…" I shrugged, grabbing for a shirt.

"Alice came over after school—"

"What?" I couldn't believe my ears.

"She and Paul broke up—like for good. He cheated on her with Lauren Mallory. Apparently, Alice wouldn't sleep with him, but Lauren did." He winced. "But his loss is hopefully my gain—idiot."

"Whoa!" I folded my legs under me and sat back. "That's crazy...Lauren really goes all the way?"

He nodded. "That's what I hear, and it is crazy. We're just kids, you know? But she's not the only one. I heard Emmett one time in the locker room...Rosalie goes all the way too."

"What?" I shouted.

"Yup, but you didn't hear that from me. Jake would know which girls put out."

"Yeah, I guess _he_ would. . . wish I was as suave as him."

"Jake _is_ Coolsville. I have no idea why he's hung up on Angela Weber." Jasper shook his head.

"She's pretty and wears glasses. I don't know. Is Alice okay?" I asked.

"Of course she is." Jazz smiled smugly and mirrored my sitting position. "Jasper Whitlock mended her broken heart."

"How?" I widened my arms.

"She let me get to second base."

I stared at him, and I couldn't even blink. "Yo-you're serious?" My heart broke just a little bit. Here I am, some _cad_ as Dad says, who's never been kissed—and Jasper got to second.

"I am. It was—Edward, it was amazing. I asked her to prom—"

"Prom?" I was confused. "I didn't know we were going…didn't you say 'only squares wear tuxedos'?"

The truth was that I never thought I'd get a date, and now Jasper might have one.

"She said she'd think about it." He frowned. "I understand—I mean, prom is seventy-three days away. So, you better get on that."

I nodded. "Jessica might go with me."

"I heard she's going with Jimmy."

"But it's seventy-three days away?" I shook my head. "How…"

Jasper patted my back. "You'll get a date."

"Yeah, okay." I leaned back against my heardboard. That was when I saw Jasper holding a folder. "What's that?"

"College applications…After I leave, I'm going over to Alice's. I want to make sure we apply to the same schools. That way we'll be together wherever, forever—"

"Jazz." I chuckled bitterly. "That's too much."

"Didn't you apply to Dartmouth because that's where Rosalie is going?"

"That was so long ago." I shook my head. "I wanted to look smart. There's no way I'll get into Dartmouth. I'm lucky if I get into U-Dub, which is where I plan and hope to go—that's where I want to go. I decided I want to teach English. They have a two-year program—I can get a teaching certificate in two-years!" I was excited.

Jasper looked away from me. "But...my dad says teaching and nursing are only for women. I hope to be pre-med wherever."

I frowned. "It's what I want to do. It might not happen...my grades are great here, but they weren't as good when I lived in Seattle. And I'll also be minoring in literature...maybe I'll write a book, too. During the break, I was so bored I started a few drafts. My mom says I really have a knack, so—"

"If U-Dub is it, then why'd you apply to all those East Coast schools?" He gave me a funny look.

"That was back in December. I did it because of Rosalie, and my dad…He wanted me to apply everywhere. . . Listen," I started again, "apply to the same schools she does, but don't go over there acting all…like you're going to ask for her hand."

Jasper nodded. "I might scare her."

"Yes," I said.

"She refused to go steady."

"Yet, she let you touch her…" I squeezed my nonexistent boobs, "tits?" I licked my lips. "Any of her friends share her morals…besides Rosalie?"

He laughed.

"I'm serious," I said.

He squealed. "They're perfect!" He rushed out. "I couldn't see because we were kissing, but…we were tongue kissing." He mimicked turning the station on the radio with his eyes closed. "Her nipples…they were small—teeny—just like her." He sounded wistful. "And her knockers fit perfectly in my hands. And the sounds she made. She moaned and groaned and spread her legs."

Both our chests were heaving, and I hated Jasper right now. Fuck. Even Jared has a girlfriend—some little girl he meets at the movies every Saturday. Mom drives; Dad pays. It's cute, and my sudden erection was coming down now.

_Good save, Peanut. _

"I'm going now." He cupped his johnson. "As you were, soldier."

After he left, I rigged the door and got back in bed. My eventual undoing was the grease stains that grace Bella's cheeks sometimes.

Dad came home late, but we waited until he did before we ate. During supper, I kind of zoned out, thinking about small pink nipples. I even shaped my mashed potatoes into breasts, and completed them with peas.

"Nice rack." Dad spied my plate.

"What are you doing?" Mom asked.

Quickly, I shoved the left breast into my mouth and shrugged my shoulders. "Can I be excused?" I asked with a mouthful.

Mom sighed. "Before you _disappear_, take out the trash—it's full."

Grinning, I stood up to kiss my mother's cheek.

She says disappear like I'm going to evaporate into thin air. Taking out the garbage was no problem, as all I planned to do was take a shower and jerk off tonight. It was raining buckets, and I ran out as fast as I could.

On my way back in, I saw someone running and laughing in the rain. They had their arms flailed, and they were turning in a circle. When they stopped to stare at me, I realized it was Bella.

And she looked adorable.

"Hey!" I put my hands in my pockets and ran to her. "You okay?"

She was still smiling and walking backwards. "Just going home. . . See ya!"

"Wait!" I shouted, not wanting her to get away. We never talk, and I never see her anymore it seems, and I actually find myself aching all the time when she's close. She close, but never close enough.

"I'd like to make it home before I catch pneumonia." Her happy disposition was gone.

"What did I do?" I stood out under the spray with my arms widened.

"Nothing," she laughed. "I just don't want to get sick!" she shouted as the sky lit up, and then the thunder clashed. "Shit!" Bella jumped and laughed. "Bye!"

"I'll drive you—"

She turned back to me. "It's okay."

Smiling, I grabbed her hand, and we ran to my house. She protested and tried to get away, but Dad said being chivalrous was important. "I'm driving you home." I all but declared.

Tonight, I wasn't taking no for an answer.

**Thank you for reading. **

**Sorry about the slight cliffy...Will Bella let Edward drive her home? Will Edward finally have the balls to ask her out? Leave Fuckward some love, and leave me your thoughts! **


	8. Wonderful Mess Part One

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

_Apparently there is nothing that cannot happen today —Mark Twain  
><em>

**"Made in the Shades" Chapter Eight: A Wonderful Mess Part One**

_Smiling, I grabbed her hand, and we ran to my house. She protested and tried to get away, but Dad said being chivalrous was important. "I'm driving you home."_

"I'm perfectly capable of walking." Bella was soaked. Her whole body was drenched and those coveralls hugged her even tighter.

"Fuck," I breathed.

"You like that word, don't you?" She quirked a brow.

"It's all I think about."

"What?" she asked.

"Come inside." I opened the door and she hesitated, while looking down to her clothes.

"No…" She peered into the foyer, looking apprehensive.

"Why?" I frowned.

"Look at me, and your house is so nice." Her face fell. "Goodnight, Edward."

She turned from me.

And I acted before I could think it out. My hand reached for hers and I yanked her back. "Please," I pleaded in a whisper, and then I sniffed her hair. "You smell really good—like rain and sunshine and wildflowers—wow." I buried my nose in her long tresses, and then palmed a handful to hold it to my nose. "Christ..."

"Let go of me!" She pushed me. "What was that?"

"I'm sorry—"

"What's in your pocket?" Bella looked down. "It hurt." She rubbed her hip.

"Um…" My eyes were glued to her waist.

"Can you let go?" Bella whispered, and I realized I was holding her at arm's length by her biceps.

"Edward, everything okay?" Mom appeared in the doorway.

"Crap." I let Bella out of my forced embrace.

Mom smiled widely at Bella. "Hello." She looked between Bella and me.

"Evening, Mrs. Cullen." Bella was still outside. "I was just leaving."

"Nonsense . . . it's raining cats and dogs out there. Come in, dear." Mom ushered her in. "I'll grab some towels." She hurried away, while Bella held her hands together. She was dripping in the foyer, with her hair matted down and her brown eyes so wide. Her face was cleaned of any makeup she might have been wearing.

And she was just…Bella.

And so fucking beautiful.

My chest started to hurt from staring.

"Why are you . . . um, looking at me like that?"

I shrugged and rubbed my chest, kneading out the knot.

"I'm a wreck…and I'm making a puddle." She danced from foot-to-foot.

"You're pretty…and we have a mop." I took a step toward her.

"Who's this?" Dad wore the biggest smile, and I wanted to die. Mom I can handle, but Dad's going to…

Huffing, I smiled back at the old man. "This is Bella."

"I know." He took Bella's hand and placed a kiss on her knuckles. "It's a pleasure to make your acquaintance again, Miss Swan."

She giggled and looked away from my father. "Please excuse my appearance, Dr. Cullen. I was caught in the rain. I—"

"Even so, you're exquisite." Dad winked.

I wanted to punch him.

Rapid footsteps stomping down the stairs, caught my attention. I knew it was Peanut. "Mom said Edward has a girl here. . . I don't believe her." Jared came into view now. "Oh, boy… Hi!" He waved.

Bella waved back. "He looks just like you." She smiled at me.

Peanut does resemble me, but he has darker hair. It's brown, where mine is a bronze-like red.

"Hey," Jared stood next to her. "I'm the better-looking brother."

"Clearly." Bella nodded.

"You think so?" I frowned.

Dad hit my arm and shook his head. "Don't go there," he whispered. "They're just playing around."

I swallowed and hated both Jared and Dad for being so suave when I couldn't. Bella smiled so freely and wide for them.

"Why don't you two go up to your room, Edward?" Dad stared at me.

"M-my—my room?" I pointed to myself.

"We can hang out in my room!" Jared said.

"Show her the record player we got you for Christmas." Dad gave me a little nudge.

I nodded and turned back to Bella. "It's this way."

"All right." She ran up ahead of me.

As I trailed behind her, Dad stopped Peanut from following and gave me a thumb up.

_What did he mean? Was he hoping I scored?_

I found that to be a little odd.

"Here you go!" Mom stopped her in the hallway. "Bathroom's right through there…and here's one of Edward's sweaters. You must be freezing." She cupped Bella's cheek. "Gorgeous." She squealed and ran past me.

I palmed my face.

"Edward…?"

I looked to Bella through my fingers.

"Are you okay?" She smiled, and then everything _was_ okay for some reason. Her smile was so reassuring and it calmed me.

I nodded, removing my hands. "My room is right here…" I pointed to the second door on the right "I'll be in there when you're done." I waited until the bathroom door closed, and then I ran into my bedroom to give it a once over.

There were no dirty socks, tissues filled with spunk, or hot books anywhere. That was a plus, but I did hide all my Boy Scout medals in my closet.

Then I put a clean, dry shirt on.

"Edward?" Bella came in, and I hadn't put the shirt on yet. I panicked and got caught in it.

"Fuck…" My huge head was stuck in the sleeve. "I'm sorry to embarrass you."

"I live with three men…none of who keep their shirts on, but…um," Bella giggled and she tried to help me. "You're a wonderful mess sometimes, Cullen." She set me free.

Just as my head went through the hole…of my shirt, my gaze caught hers.

"Sorry about them—me, being a mess," I whispered.

She shrugged, shaking her head. "Your mom is really glamorous and your dad..." Bella looked away from me. "Your room is awesome—big—your house is really nice."

And I noticed how wonderful she looked in my green cardigan. It was on the loose side and looked more like a nightgown, but it fit her perfectly all the same.

_Nightgown. _

Then I wondered what she'd look like wearing my sweater and nothing underneath.

"Edward?" She stared at me. "Are you all right?"

"Um…thank you?" I stood awkwardly in my bedroom.

_Edward Cullen had Bella Swan in his bedroom. _

I wanted to squeal—felt it in my throat and my muscles stiffened from excitement. ". . . Eeep. . . ."

"What was that noise?" Bella asked.

I blinked, trying to think up something good—like Dad said. "My heart that beats for you." I took a step toward her.

"You're so weird," she laughed.

"Yeah." I dropped my shoulders.

"Where's this record player?" She looked around.

"In the living room…It's portable. I can go get it…I have a radio." I walked to it. "The Moondog Show should be on—"

"Who?" She scrunched her nose.

I smiled because she looked so cute. "It's a show on ABC Radio. Um, it's out of New York, but they play it here on the West Coast, too…just at a different time."

"Oh…I listen to records mostly." She hugged the sweater to her.

"I have records." I walked to them on my bookshelf. "Wh-what kind of music do you like?"

She came to stand next to me. "Wow…you have a lot." And I'd never tell her—that due to my habitually dateless status—I usually spend my allowance on music. Hopefully, that'll change soon.

"Um…I like jazz, electric blues, and rock 'n' roll…I have some Doo-wop, too." I fingered my records.

"I love Elvis Presley," she giggled.

"Doesn't everyone?" I grinned.

She looked to the floor. "Do you have a favorite?"

I thought about that for a second. "I really dig Little Richard…Chuck Berry, Gene Vincent and the Blue Caps, Bo Diddley, Joe Turner…Did you know that Carl Perkins recorded 'Blue Suede Shoes' first? I have it, the single…and Elvis's version. Um…"

She laughed at me, I think.

I cleared my throat. "I like music." Taking a deep breath, I stepped away from my collection.

"Clearly you do…Do you dance?" She went to take a seat on my bed, but shot up quickly. "Sorry."

"No!" I shouted. "Please…" Gesturing to my bed, I collapsed onto the floor in front of her, folding my legs. "Um…sit."

Her cheeks reddened as she took a seat. "I didn't want to seem forward." She looked away from me.

"For sitting on my bed?" I shook my head. "I mean…if you got in bed _with_ me I could see how—uh, yeah." This time I laughed at myself. "What were you saying before?"

She nodded, hugging herself. "Dancing."

"Dancing…" I blew out a breath. "Well, my mother taught me the Foxtrot, but…" I trailed my hand through my hair, embarrassed. "I can rock 'n' roll dance, the bop, the swing—jitterbug—the lindy…Peanut's a great partner."

"Peanut?" she asked.

"Jared…my little brother. My dad used to say he wasn't any bigger than a peanut. That's not the case anymore. I haven't been able to…really toss him around in like…a year." I rambled.

She played with a loose thread on the sweater. "For Christmas…my dad bought me _Betty White's Teen-age Dance Book_. Despite Emmett's efforts to keep me sheltered," she rolled her eyes, "my dad wants me to be more social. After all, I'll never land a husband if I'm—" she looked to me with wide eyes, "crap. Sorry."

I grabbed her hand. "Please…say whatever." Letting go of her hand, I let my wrist slide down her knee. "A book? You can't learn how to dance from a book."

She shrugged. "I really don't, um, care too much about it. I have no one to dance with." She looked to my wall.

Willing my heart rate to slow down, I knew this was another "cue" or "in", as Jasper put it. Apparently girls, and women alike, do not like to be forthcoming, and so they put innuendos or half-assed invitations out there. Jasper's no Romeo, but I understand what he was getting at. "Well, you could always help me. I love to dance and have no one to practice with. I'm sure you weigh less than Peanut, uh…" I shook my head. "That didn't come out right."

"Maybe…"

"Huh?" I asked.

"Just…maybe."

"Oh…how was your Christmas otherwise?" I asked.

"It's April," she giggled, "but my Christmas was quiet—I also got a new iron. My spring recess was quiet too." She laughed again. "I should get home." She stood up.

"An iron?" I stood up too. "For Christmas?"

"I needed a new one."

"Oh…well, I'm ready when you are." I gestured out to the hall.

Bella held her wet hair off to the side of her neck as she left my bedroom. My eyes never left the sexy slope of flesh that I wanted to bite.

And I thank fuck that Jared demanded her attention when I missed a step and landed on my ass.

Dad caught it, and he looked like he wanted to kill me.

"Sorry." I mouthed, while he shook his head at me.

Dad recovered quickly and stood up to woo Bella again. Mom stared at him adoringly, like she got a kick out of it. Jared had stars in his eyes, and I wanted to get out of here.

They could fawn over her another time.

It was my turn.

"Promise you won't be a stranger?" Dad smiled, while I grabbed my coat off the rack. Speaking of, I wondered where Bella's leather jacket was. I love her in it.

Bella blushed and took her wet jacket from my mother. "You're very kind, Dr. and Mrs. Cullen." She looked to Mom, who was holding her heart and staring at her now.

"You're a doll." Mom touched her cheek. "Come over any time. Even if Edward's not home and you want to chat—I'm home."

Bella frowned and looked down when she said that.

It made my chest hurt again. Why did she look so sad? I didn't think my mother said anything wrong. She's just friendly.

"Thank you." Bella squeezed Mom's hand.

I grabbed my keys. "It's getting late."

"Drive safely, honey." If shit wasn't bad enough, my mom kissed my cheek.

"After you, darling." I held the door open for Bella.

I could tell by the look on her face that she didn't buy that sweetheart crap. But I did it for my father's benefit.

"Remember to be polite. Take deep breaths and think _before_ you speak…sweet talk…you'll be fine." Dad patted my back. "Son?"

Just as I remembered to grab an umbrella, my head snapped to Bella who was going to get drenched again. She was already on the walkway.

"Shit—Bella!" I ran out to her while I tried to open it.

"Edward!" Dad chastised. "Never mind!"

I heard the door slam, but I made it to Bella and was able to shield her from the rain and guide her into the car.

_Crisis averted._

Feeling like the luckiest sonofabitch, I ran around to enter the driver's side. "Sorry…we're all weird," I sighed, placing the key in the ignition.

"I think your parents are nice." Bella fiddled with the radio.

With a smile, I backed out of the driveway and continued on in the rain. Thankfully, it had let up from earlier. "It stopped raining a little." I stated the obvious.

"Uh-huh," Bella agreed. "You can just let me out here."

"Which house is yours?" I pretended like I didn't know, but I did know that it was at least three down from where we were now.

"Just…over there." She waved a hand. "This is good, though."

"No. I'll—"

"Edward, this is close enough."

I ignored her, until I pulled up to the curb outside of her house—her real house. "The other day I saw Emmett tweaking his bike in the drive," I lied, having followed her home months back.

I was curious.

"Oh…It's nothing special." She jerked her thumb to her house.

I didn't give a fuck about her house and stared down to her thighs. They're thicker when she sat, and I liked that. Then I thought I might be rude. "I like the color. It looks like an amazing place to live."

"It's yellow and all chipped." She stared out her window, as did I. "My great grandparents built it in like 1890."

Another factor on my side was that I didn't see Emmett's car. He's lucky and has both a motorcycle and a car.

"Is your brother out with Rosalie?" I put the car in park.

"Oh…so that's why you drove me home?" Bella stormed out of my car. "News flash! The princess lives on your side—the swanky part of town!"

"Whoa! No!" I ran out after her. "Bella!" I tried taking her hand, and she pulled away. "I was just curious…trying to make conversation."

She stared up at the drizzle. "Thanks for the ride." Bella turned for her door again, and I caught her—not letting her go.

"Don't—not-not yet," I stammered. "Want to sit in the car?"

Bella didn't answer me, but she shrugged out of my hold and reentered my car.

"Yes!" I said through gritted teeth and gave a downward punch to the air. Bella didn't see it.

Once we were in the cab again, Bella jumped when thunder sounded. "Are you okay?"

She nodded, looking down to her hands. "Do you like Rosalie…I mean, she's blonde, rich, and really pretty?"

Pursing my lips, I shook my head no.

"Don't lie to me."

"What's the difference?" I asked, instead of just saying no, and then I palmed my stupid face.

"Because…if you're hanging around tonight in hopes to see her—"

"No way," I disagreed. "I'm here because of you." I blew out a breath. "You looked so cute dancing in the rain…and I—I didn't want you to leave. I wanted more time with you. Also…I didn't want you to get sick."

Bella looked out the window, but with the reflection of the street lamp I saw her smile. It was a really big one—her eyes were crinkled, and I think I heard a squeal.

I did good.

"Really?"

I scooted closer to her. "Yes." I put my arm on the back of the seat, hoping she'd lean into it. "So…what's it like working at the garage?"

She scoffed. "Boring…I'm stuck all day with those animals—all they talk about are tits and ass, and whose car or chick is faster than whose…"

I chuckled, twirling a lock of her damp hair in my fingers—doing it so lightly because I was afraid she'd feel it. "That doesn't sound so bad."

"To you…a guy." She was still smiling. "Look, I should really get in. My dad will be home soon, and he'll be starving—we eat late."

I furrowed my brow. "What about your mom?"

She stiffened. "I don't even remember her."

"My apologies." I frowned.

"No. She's not dead; although she might as well be…she just…took off when I was a baby."

"So…you go to school, work, keep house, and cook?" I made a face. "And you're…sixteen?"

She shook her head. "I cook. If I didn't, Charlie, Paul, and Emmett would starve. For the most part, we all just take care—clean up after ourselves, but…Emmett and Paul act like I'm their mom, despite treating me like a baby in public. Alice has been great, though…showing me all the girl stuff. I don't know if we'll still be friends because of Paul…I'm—I'm trying to be more ladylike—" She gasped. "I can't believe I just said all that."

"You can tell me anything," I said, feeling a pang of…something, as I detected sadness in her voice—I hated that. "Why do you call your dad 'Charlie'?" I asked. "I mean, my dad would be upset if I called him Carlisle."

"Wow…that's a cool first name."

I snorted. "And I got stuck with Edward."

"It's a great name." She put her hand on my forearm. "Sorry." She pulled it back.

"You can…touch me," I whispered.

Bella didn't reply to that admission. "I don't know why. We all just call him Charlie. Sometimes I call him 'Dad', but…yeah." She became quiet again.

"Um, Bella?"

She turned to grin at me.

I grinned back and paused, thinking about what Dad said. "Do…do you think they can go one night without you?" I asked. "I mean…did you wanna go see a movie sometime? Or…we can do whatever you want." I shrugged, biting my thumbnail.

Bella turned to stare at me. "You're serious?"

"Yes?" The way she said it made me so unsure. "No…I mean, yes! I'd love to go out—take you out, Bella." I leaned into her. "You have no idea…I've wanted to since the first day of school."

She scooted closer and turned to face me. "What about Emmett?"

Fuck. That was a loaded question I'd forgotten all about.

_You're a dead man!_

Yes, but I'd rather snag a first kiss and maybe feel a boob—I'm hoping to score before I die.

_Think, Cullen!_

There wasn't much to ponder. "Let _me_ worry about Emmett." I palmed her cheek.

"I'm not worth it," she whispered.

"You're insane if you believe that." I swallowed, pulling her hair behind her ear. "You are."

She sucked in a shaky breath and bit her lip. "Yes."

I blinked. "Yes, what?"

"Yes…I accept the date. It's a date, right? Or are we just going to hang out Friday?" Her face fell, and her eyes pleaded with me for something.

I shrugged. "It's whatever you want." I didn't know how to answer.

She turned for the door. "Goodnight, Edward."

"Wait!" I pulled her back. "What's your deal?"

She stiffened again, and I realized that she was still in my arms. But if she wasn't complaining, I wasn't letting go. "I don't know." She stared at my lips. "I just—you don't seem to know what you want…ever. That's all—a date, a blonde or a brunette, or hanging out." She rambled. "I see you and—"

"See me?"

"The way you go back and forth."

"I was giving you a choice," I whispered. "It's…whatever you want, and I've always been partial to brunettes—" I pursed my lips. "That didn't come out right...um, what I meant to say was that. Bella, I've liked you for a long time. And . . . I'd be the luckiest guy in the world if you agreed."

"Oh."

She felt amazing in my arms and I increased my hold, which made her breath hitch. "Bella?"

"Yes?" She had her eyes closed.

My insides were screaming, and her lips were calling me. It was no longer a want. I needed to kiss her. "C-can I—"

"Yes."

"Okay," I whispered and gently placed my lips against hers.

Her lips were so soft, and my stomach filled with butterflies, and my dick got hard, and we hadn't even used tongues.

When I was going to deepen it, I saw headlights beaming right at us, while tilting my head to the side.

Emmett had pulled into the driveway.

**Thank you for reading!**

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**As each chapter posts, reviews dwindle lower and lower, and I'm afraid you're all flouncing *wince***


	9. Wonderful Mess Part Two

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Wow! I am blown away. I thought by begging for reviews would piss you guys off. Thanks SO freaking much! And that is why you guys get this! Is this the 2nd update today? I think SO! Can we review again? Well, I hope so! THANK YOU!**

_Do the thing you fear most and the death of fear is certain —Mark Twain._

"**Made in the Shades" **

**Chapter Nine: A Wonderful Mess Part Two**

Bella pulled away and her face was the prettiest shade of pink. "Wow…"

I nodded.

It was a great kiss, and I was so happy for that, because I might just die right now.

Emmett left the car and walked around to get the door for Rosalie. I could barely see them. My windows were fogged up something awful from the rain and our breathing, but it definitely wasn't due to us necking.

Bella lifted her fist to clear a circle on the window. "Uh-oh."

"What do you mean,_ 'uh-oh'_?" I asked.

"Get out of the fucking car!" Emmett punched my hood.

"Shit…stay inside." I told Bella, and fumbled to let myself out of the car. If he was going to kill me, I wanted to spare her that mental image.

"What the fuck did I say?" He pulled me out to slam me back to the car.

Remembering to stay calm, I tried to put words together. "She needed a ride home—it was pouring out."

He searched my eyes, likely sniffing out my fear.

"Emmett, let him go!" Bella shouted, running over to us. I also saw Rosalie pull Bella back and smirk at me. Bitch. Sexy bitch, but she's still a bitch.

"He touched you?" Emmett asked Bella.

I closed my eyes tightly, expecting the blow.

When she didn't answer right away, I chanced a glance.

"Bells?" Now Emmett actually looked more upset than angry. What I know of Bella is that she's pretty honest. She probably doesn't want to lie to Emmett or get me beat up.

"I just kissed her," I said.

"Edward!" Bella hollered.

"And I asked her out on a date." I finished.

Emmett laughed, letting me go. "No."

"No?" Bella and I shouted in unison.

Emmett punched his chest, like some fucking ape. "I said no. Dad will say no."

"Dad _won't_ say no!" Bella stomped her foot.

"You asked _her_ out?" Rosalie pointed to Bella, frowning.

I nodded.

"You say that like it's a bad thing." Bella looked like she was about to cry, and I had to say something so she wouldn't. For someone who's so concerned about his sister's welfare, Emmett didn't jump to put Rosalie in her place.

"_Bella's_ the prettiest girl in Forks. It is most _certainly_ not a bad thing." I was talking to Rosalie but staring at Bella. I couldn't look away. She was gorgeous under the street lamp, and looked so small and cute in my huge sweater. I wanted to pin her to the hood of my car and—

"Please…" Rosalie rolled her eyes.

"It's true—she is—and of course, I did." I swallowed, and all three of them turned to stare at me. "Emmett, sir…um, if you would be so kind—"

"Cullen, get in your fucking car and go home." Emmett pointed.

I cleared my throat and stood to my full height. "No. I don't think I need your permission, but if you need me to ask—I will. I'd love to take Bella out this weekend…And I'll do it with or—" he glared at me, "without your permission." I finished with a nod.

"You're so far-out!" Bella giggled.

I smiled at her. "You're…everything."

And then Emmett punched me square in the jaw, which made me keel over.

"Fuck…" I held my face.

"Let's go!" Emmett shouted, trying to get me to swing.

"What's the matter with you?" Bella hopped up to smack the back of her brother's head. "Go inside!" She pushed him.

Emmett tried to cover his head from her hands. "Bells…stop. I was just—"

"Go! Get out of here, ya idiot!" She hollered, and I could tell she was crying. "I can't believe you—I hate you!" She started to beat against his chest with her fists. They continued to fight, and Rosalie came to stand next to me.

"Hey…" When I reached to break it up, Emmett gave me a look like he'd rather get beat up by Bella than have me touch her. I stepped back. The alternative would turn into Emmett chasing me, and Bella chasing Emmett.

"They'll be at it for hours now." Rosalie sounded bored. "Give me a ride home?" She rubbed my forearm.

"No." I tried not to laugh.

"What do you mean, no?" She stepped closer to me.

"I'm not your boyfriend, who has two modes of transportation by the way. It is not my obligation to see you home. It is, however, _in my best interest_ to wait around for them to stop arguing—I need to know the end result." I grinned.

"Edward…cut the bullshit. We both know you just want to get laid. Despite her being…from here—this part of town—Bella's not like that. She's not what you're looking for."

"What?" I never wanted to hit a woman before, but I did now. "You're so wrong," I whispered. "And…don't say shit like that."

She smirked and touched my stomach. "What are you going to do about it?"

"I can't do anything about it, but I hope one day Bella's brave enough to smack you in your nasty mouth."

Rosalie laughed at me.

"God knows what's been in there," I muttered.

"You're lucky I don't tell Emmett."

I turned to see Emmett and Bella still arguing. "Do what you have to do."

For some reason, I wasn't afraid anymore. Emmett and his friends already pounded my ass. Emmett has already humiliated me on more than one occasion. What's the worst he could do now? Not a damn thing. It's all been done before.

_And…_

Even if Rosalie was Rosalie, for some reason she didn't make me nervous anymore—she hasn't made me stammer, stutter, or trip over my own two feet in months. Her games were fun for a little while, but that's all they were—games. She flirts with me, but Emmett's the one fucking her. She comes to me when they fight or break up, and yet she never puts out or accepts my dates—well, I only asked her out that one time, and I figured if she wanted to go out, she'd say something.

Rosalie was my dream girl in looks alone. But deep down, she's heartless and cold, and I never cared about that—it didn't make a difference if Satan possessed her.

If she wanted to fuck, I'd embrace the devil himself and come deep inside his evil vessel.

It's funny how when it came to Rosalie, getting laid was my _only_ intention.

And she's from my part of town, whatever the fuck that means.

Now Jake lives in a shitty part of town, but this part was decent. I looked up and down the block. The houses were just older. In my neighborhood, they're all new constructions, but I could appreciate all the old architecture.

"He asked me out! Just accept it!" Bella shouted.

"He's an asshole!"

After tonight, I _might_ have a shot with Bella. Meanwhile, Bella made me nervous as hell. I didn't understand it. But she's warm, gorgeous, real, funny, honest, and she thinks I'm far-out.

She seems to like me—Edward Cullen—cad extraordinaire, despite my verbal diarrhea and my eyes that are always on her tits.

Bella digs me, I think.

And I have so many thoughts and intentions—all good—when it comes to her, it's scary.

"I need a ride, Edward." Rosalie hooked her pinky to mine.

Smirking, I leaned into her. "Why…because you're jealous—now you're hoping to fog up my windows?" I teased.

And then Bella came out of nowhere and got the other side of my jaw. "Asshole!"

Rosalie laughed at me.

"Christ…I was kidding!" I screamed. "I was NOT asking—just joshing."

"I'm sorry," Bella mumbled from behind her hands.

Emmett barked out a laugh and put his arm around Rosalie. "Come on, Rosie." They walked toward the house. "I'm watching you, Cullen."

My expression was not one of amusement as I watched them stroll up the walkway.

"Edward?" Bella whispered, lightly touching my arm but taking it back.

I gritted my teeth—flexing my jaw—staring down at her.

"I'm sorry."

I nodded. "It was a joke. I tease her all the time—there's no-nothing behind it. She-she's not the one I want." Hating myself, I opened the car door. "I'll see you at school."

"Wait." Bella stopped me from getting in.

My ego didn't exist at this point. My hopes and dreams were shattered, and I wanted to say "to hell with them both," but Bella still looked so pretty in my cardigan.

"What?" I asked, trailing my hand through my hair and staring at the pavement.

"Your sweater." She went to take it off.

I stopped her. "Keep it."

"Like…wear it to school?"

I shrugged. "Sure." Then I smiled so wide. "Yes…wear it to school!" That's the second best thing to marking my territory. Mom stitches my initials in all my clothes. So, if Bella wore my sweater, she'd be branded with an E.C.

"Okay." Bella hugged it to her. "So…Friday?"

I nodded, still smiling like a moron. "I'll—I'll pick you up at eight?"

"Seven…I have to be home by eleven." She looked down. "But no, eight is fine. Three hours is enough, I guess."

I shook my head no because that wasn't enough time. "I'll pick you up at six, or we can just leave from school." I brushed my fingers along her cheek, wanting to kiss her so bad.

"That's—that's wonderful." She stood on her toes, getting excited in that girl way.

It made me hard.

"What-what should I wear?" she asked.

"Anything—me." I leaned into her. "Kidding," I lied, throwing her a wink.

She snorted a laugh. "You're so funny."

I crossed my legs, hoping to hurt my penis. "Goodnight."

She waved, being shy. "Goodnight, Edward."

It was still raining lightly when I got home. At first, I didn't want to go home. I wanted to go straight to Jasper's house and throw my date in his face. Rosalie might be the—pin-up model—wet dream of every guy in town.

But I got a date with Bella: the most unattainable, coolest chick in the whole fucking county.

Bella wore my sweater in lieu of her leather jacket all week.

On Thursday, she admitted that she washed it, and so she asked me to wear it during lunch because it didn't smell like me anymore. Then she almost cried after admitting that and ran away from me.

I chased her down, stole my sweater, a kiss, and gave it back to her at the end of the day—so fucking happy.

My brain was fucked after that.

I liked her so much more that it was scary.

And she was all—and I mean_ all_—I thought about.

**Thank you for reading.**

**I know this is short. Sorry. Originally, all chapters were 1 - 2k long, but I added so much. Still, I thought this chap was great standing alone. **

**Please leave me your thoughts. **


	10. Everyone's Pal

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

_A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way_**. - Mark Twain **

"**Made in the Shades" **

**Chapter Ten: Everyone's Pal**

"So…tonight's the big night," Jasper said.

I sighed and pulled into a parking spot. "Yeah…I'm so excited and a little nervous, but…I think it'll be okay." I turned to look at him.

He was slowly shaking his head. "Bella Swan…"

"Yes, Bella Swan." My smile was fucking massive right now.

"What do you have planned?" Jasper left the car.

Reaching into the backseat, I grabbed my books and then followed. "Dinner in Port, and then the drive-in. But if she wants to do something else…" I trailed off as I closed the door. "I'm not picky."

"Awww…" Jasper chuckled. "Just as long as you guys are together, right?"

I laughed too. "Pretty much."

"Wrong." Jasper composed his smile. "This is _the_ night…it'll make or break you. If things don't work out with Bella, she'll still tell all the girls what kind of time she had. It's best you act like a gentleman, and…pull out all the stops. Take her some place classy and _stay away_ from the cliffs."

Nodding, I blew out a breath. "I hope things work out. I'm—I'm crazy about her," I whispered the last part.

He patted my back while we began to walk. "I know you are. I'm just saying…I mean, look at me. I'm ready to run Alice down an aisle, and she's back to acting like I don't exist."

"I'm sorry," I said.

He chuckled bitterly. "It is what it is…"

We silently walked into school, while my head whipped every-which-way, looking for Bella.

"Stop that. Let her find you."

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah…whatever."

We went our separate ways. I went to my locker, and Jasper walked down to his. Just as I was about to close the distance, I dropped my books because someone bumped their shoulder to mine.

"Oh…shit. I'm sorry," Jimmy laughed.

"Fuck you," I spat and bent over to grab my books.

"You think you're a tough guy now, huh?"

I stood up and squared my shoulders. "Get the fuck out of my way."

He pushed me. "And if I don't?"

"Jimmy, knock it off!" Emmett came over to usher him away.

My eyes never left his as he backed away from me.

"What happened?" Bella asked. She stood beside me, but I wasn't going to look away first. "Edward?"

As soon as Jimmy and Emmett rounded a corner, I turned to smile down at Bella. "Good morning." I bent low and stopped a mere centimeter from her cheek. "May I?" I whispered.

She sighed and her cheeks were flushed. It was like I could feel the heat radiating off of her. "Don't ask, just…" she swallowed, "do it."

While smiling so wide, I closed the distance to place a soft kiss on her cheek. "Thank you," I whispered, touching my nose to her ear.

She squealed. "That makes me tingle."

"It does?" When I pulled away, I saw that her chest was heaving—up and down—her breasts were moving up and down so rapidly. "Wow…" I stared, wishing my cardigan and her blouse would disappear.

"Morning, Edward!"

My head snapped to Rosalie, who was wearing a low-cut top. "M-morning!" I lifted my hand, but then looked down when Bella hit my shoulder. "What?"

She narrowed her eyes at me. "Just…nothing." Bella slumped her shoulders.

"I'm sitting with Alice today." Rosalie came to stand next to me. "Save you a seat?" She rubbed up my bicep.

"Um…"

Bella let out a groan, and then walked away from me.

"Hey!" I shouted and ran after her. "What—what's wrong?" I turned Bella to face me, and she looked so sad. "What did I do?"

She shook her head and kept her gaze down. "Nothing," Bella whispered. "It's just…I don't know."

"Okay." I was confused. "C-can, um, we sit together at lunch?" I asked, my heart beating furiously. She agreed to go out on a date with me, but I wasn't sure what was okay and what wasn't—as far as spending time together went.

"Really…you want to?"

I nodded, taking her books out of her hands. "Of course, I do."

"Well, Rosalie asked you to sit with her. . ."

"And I _want_ to sit with you." I put my arm out, hoping she'd link it with hers.

Bella was smiling again as she took hold of my arm. "Yes…I usually sit with Angela and Jake."

"Would you mind if Jasper—"

"Not at all." She rushed out. "Did you have any trouble with the _King Lear_ essay?"

We were right in front of our English classroom. "Nope. Mr. Banner said two thousand words, and I think I went over it—I'm not sure. I'm trying so hard." I shook my head.

"It shows…I mean, I peek at your work when he hands it all back—you're so smart, getting A plusses and stuff."

"I'm not," I blurted, hating myself. It was one thing to apply to colleges to make people think I was intelligent, but I didn't want to lie to Bella. "You're the smart one…taking senior classes."

She grinned. "You _are_ smart. You just need to pay better attention." She reached up to poke my nose, and then she turned and walked into the room.

I trailed behind her, staring at her ass—which was covered by my sweater. It still looked fantastic. "Hall to desk service, m'lady," I laughed as I placed her books down in front of her.

"Oops." Rosalie pushed her pencil off her desk.

I didn't give her the satisfaction of picking it up. What the fuck was her deal? I had a suspicion that my interaction with Rosalie upset Bella. And the last thing I wanted to do was upset my sexy date. Screw being a gentleman. After all, she pushed her pencil off her desk. She's not that slick anymore. I'm hip to her tricks. Bitch.

"Can you grab that?" Rosalie asked. She just had to and now if I don't, I'll look like an asshole.

I groaned and bent over, and I had a déjà vu. Bella went to get it as well, and we bumped our heads together. "Shit." I cupped my forehead, laughing. Bella was giggling too. "Did I hurt you?" I reached over to brush my fingers along her eyebrow, where the impact had been.

She slightly shook her head no. "I'm okay."

I stared at her lips, so pink, so full, and so gorgeous. "You look so pretty today."

"Hello?" Rosalie sounded annoyed.

"Here." Bella chucked the pencil back to her. "You were saying?" She stared at me.

I grinned, finally taking my seat next to her. "N-nothing. It's just, um, you look very beautiful today—every day."

"You're so sweet," she sighed and faced the front of the room.

"Um…" I poked her hand with my pinky. "We're still on for tonight, right?"

Her eyes widened as turned to look at me. "Why…did something come up? If you need to cancel—I—I under—"

"Hell, no!" I nearly shouted. "Sorry. I—um—no. Nothing came up…I'm still available, are you?"

"Definitely."

"Great." I nodded.

"Yeah."

"I can't wait." I covered my mouth after admitting that.

"Neither can I." She smiled so wide.

And I stared at her for the rest of English class. She told me to cut it out, but I couldn't help it.

And so she got over it.

…**0.o…**

As soon as I came home from school, I jacked off three times in succession. I needed to get it out of my system. My mother looked at me funny, because she wanted to help me prepare and get ready for my big night, but Dad coerced her into leaving me alone.

He knew what I was doing.

"Mom?" I had an hour before I had to pick up Bella, which meant I could drive over to the new Olympic Outfitters store in town. It's next door to the grocery store, and I fell in love with a leather jacket they had on display earlier in the week.

The owner, Mr. Samuels, said they got the jacket by mistake. They were supposed to get a few hiking jackets, and that came instead. It was gorgeous, black, shiny, had zippered pockets, and I thought the mistake was some kind of twisted fate—as I felt it was my destiny to own it.

"Yes, dear?" She was peeling apples for pie.

"I saw this jacket—and well—I really want it for tonight." I stared, waiting.

"What do you need?" Dad asked, joining us and stealing an apple peel.

I groaned under my breath. I was never getting it now. "It's no big deal—nothing."

"A jacket," Mom said.

"What's wrong with the one you have? The one you _had _to have because it looked like the one the guy wore in _Rebel without a Cause_—"

"_East of Eden_," I corrected him. "But that was last spring—in Seattle. It's all about the leather here in Forks." I hugged myself.

My father laughed at me. He thought it was the funniest thing in the world. "You…in a leather jacket? Ay-oh! Brando! Who do you think you are, _The Wild One_?" He waved his hands like a jackass. "You're not an actor, Edward…You're not some guy from a movie."

"So?" I threw my hands up. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"Why can't you be yourself?"

I didn't reply to that. "You don't have to get me anything for my birthday this year."

"No," he deadpanned. "Wear what you have."

"Please!" It was almost a full-blown whine but I reined it in. "What's the point of having money if—"

Dad barked out another laugh. "I'm well-off, and you're my child. Don't mistake my wealth for yours. You also have no clue what the meaning of a dollar is . . . Grow up, son—"

"I'll never ask for anything again." I crossed my fingers and toes.

"Get a job, Edward." Dad fanned out the paper. "The button-mill is hiring—a dollar and ten cents an hour. You'll have that jacket in no time . . . since your allowance isn't enough," he let out an elongated sigh.

"Mom?" I stared at her, the tie and deal breaker.

"Esme," Dad said sternly, raising a brow and peering around the paper.

Mom stared at the apple in her hands. "Your father's right, Edward. You should be yourself." She nodded.

With my head hung low, I went to leave the kitchen.

"Edward?" Mom called, and I thought she was going to take pity on me. "Go look in your father's closet. He has so many snazzy blazers."

"Esme…" Dad complained.

"Go!" Mom shooed me away.

Dad glared. I grinned and ran up to grab his favorite patterned sports jacket.

_Take that, old man._

Running it into my room, I quickly picked out a new outfit to go underneath. I wore black slacks, a green plaid button-down shirt, and the navy blue patterned sports jacket.

Surprisingly, I was happy with the result. The jacket made my shoulders broader, and I looked like a man, not a skinny teenager. But, the colors were all wrong.

"Don't wear that shirt—put a white polo under." Dad came into my room. "It's—too busy. You'll hypnotize the poor girl with too many patterns." He went into my closet, and then threw my white polo at me. "And...Edward, it doesn't match." He made a face. "What's wrong with you?"

"I don't know. . .Thanks for the shirt." I quickly undressed to put that shirt on instead.

"I've been meaning to talk to you. . . especially before you left for college." He had a weird tone to his voice. "I know we never spoke about it, but you've never dated, only drooled over women," he laughed.

"Rub it in." I rolled my eyes.

"Anyway," he looked back to me, "sex, Edward. More and more these days, teens your age are having it. What do you know about sex?"

My heart rate sped up. "Sex?" I swallowed, my mouth suddenly dry. "I know it's something I'd like to do one day…with a girl…maybe two…no, just one. Any more than that, and I'd just be greedy."

Dad slowly shook his head at me. "Keep dreaming."

"What, um, what's it like?" I whispered.

Dad smirked at me. "I can promise you that it'll be one of the greatest pleasures you will ever know."

"And…how do I get a girl to do that?"

"You usually have to marry her first." He put his hands up. "Let's backtrack a bit. I want to know what you know."

"I know the mechanics—where things go," I said. "But, it's a first date, and Bella is not…fresh." Deep down in my heart, I hoped she was. Maybe someday I'll have sex, but tonight I was just hoping for a real kiss…and maybe pretending to touch her boob by accident. Just, "Oops, sorry. Didn't see it there."

"Fair enough." He nodded. "What do you know about pleasing a woman?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "Isn't that what my penis is for? It's like…mutual stimulation." My cheeks flamed when I said the latter part of that sentence.

He laughed at me.

"Dad…" I squirmed under his chuckles. "Stop." I actually felt like I might tear up, and I didn't know why I was so sensitive.

"I'm sorry. You know the proper thing to do is wait until _after_ marriage."

Now I laughed at him. "You're funny."

"I'm serious."

"Can you tell me how to…do stuff?" I asked, ever so eager. "You're a doctor…and my dad." I pleaded, looking like a hungry puppy.

His hand took the shape of a gun—two fingers pointing out and a thumb raised. "Well…" He looked down to his hand, and his thumb twirled in a circle.

I found myself doing it too. "Like this? What am I doing this to? Am I going to pretend to shoot her?" I snorted a laugh.

"Oh, Edward…you're adorable," Mom said from the doorway. "You do what feels natural, and your thumb will find purchase." She came in to palm my cheeks, and now I wanted to die. "When the time is right—which it isn't tonight—you do whatever your gut tells you."

"Esme!" Dad shouted. "Don't tell him that. The poor boy will go to prison."

"Not my Edward." Mom shook her head, staring at me. "Not my respectable, handsome, baby boy." She kissed my cheek. "After tonight, you should be able to decide if you'd like to court Bella. And then…we'll—"

"Esme…Jared's crying," Dad lied.

Mom gasped and fled my bedroom.

I thought Dad was just making sure she left the room, but he was really staring at her ass—like she was some piece of meat and not my mother. I hated that.

"Hey," I said.

He turned back to me slowly, glaring. "What?"

"Nothing," I whispered. "She's just—that's mom, and I know she's your wife, but...I don't know."

"Keep that in mind." He let out a small chuckle. "The next time you find your tongue hanging out of your mouth and you're suddenly leering, remember that the woman you're scoping is someone's mother, sister, or daughter."

"Oh. . ."

"But when you're in my house, don't pay attention to what I look at. That's my wife. She's my woman, and so I can look."

"I know that," I said.

"When you have your own, you'll understand." He stood up to sigh again. "No drinking and driving. You get that girl home on time, and for God's sake…" He stopped.

"What?" I asked.

"Have a good time." He tossed me a small-foiled thing, and I realized it was a condom. Believe it or not, before I moved to Forks, I had never seen one. Jake keeps a box in his glove compartment, and Jasper has many—wishful thinking.

Jasper taught me how to put one on.

We're not queer, we're just best friends, and we're not shy.

"I don't need this," I said.

"I know, but just in case…can't hurt to carry it with you." He raised a brow. "What if things…take a turn? Do you love Bella enough to marry her if, God forbid, she became with child?"

"Fuck…" I blanched back, like he was the _Creature from the Black Lagoon_.

"No, you don't love her at all—you're dating, which is kid shit . . . Do you like her enough to forgo college and live off your mother and me because you have to get two jobs? We're not supporting you and your family. . .Or!" he shouted. "You may think she's your gal, but she's everyone's pal. What do you know about syphilis?"

"Dad, stop." I was scared now.

"That thing you love to pull on? It can fall off."

I gasped and cupped my cock.

He nodded. "That's right. Put it in your wallet…can't hurt. . . I suppose I should, uh, tell you how to put it on?"

"No, I know. Jasper showed me-"

"What?" he snapped. "Showed you? What the hell are you boys up to?"

"He just. . . showed me, that's all." While I reached back for my wallet, I nodded. "Give me two more—I'll wear three if I have to." I held out my hand.

He didn't reply and left without another word.

I turned back to the man in the mirror—with the broad shoulders.

He'd look so much better with the leather jacket.

"Edward!" Peanut shouted, running into my room.

I turned from the mirror to smile down at him. He was beaming and trying to open a box. "They finally came!"

"What?" I took the box from him and started undoing the tape.

"Our rings . . .you look nice." He eyed me from head to toe.

"Tonight's the night." I managed to get the box open, and then he snatched it from my hands.

"I can't wait to give Chelsea hers..." He opened a smaller box. "This one's yours." He threw it at me to take out the other one.

"Some timing." I opened it up to see that it didn't say "Angel Face". Instead, the red plastic ring said "Angel Fake".

"What the...?" Peanut stared at his, frowning.

I was doing the same. "What does yours say?"

"Peanut Cal...it's was supposed to be 'girl'. What's a Cal?" He stared up at me.

I shrugged. "Maybe it goes with Angel Fake." I threw my ring back into the box. "You sure I look good?" I faced the mirror again.

"You look like a grown-up."

I nodded. "Yeah..."

**Thank you for reading!**

**Please leave me your thoughts.**

**Once again, I KNOW how immature Edward is. Trust me; it's the innocence of the time. Ignorance was truly bliss back then. Also, sexual education between boys and girls was SO different. I have NO proof, like websites or documents, but my grandmother told me. Boys knew A LOT more than girls did (the little they even knew). Sexual education for the female consisted of a demonstration of donning a sanitary napkin - explaining the natural process leading to being a mother. *smh***

**I'm sure basic biology was taught, but. . . **

**Oh, and MANY people had sex before marriage. It just wasn't spoken about! **

**:) **

**Thanks again!**


	11. The Classy Guy

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**A/N: I received a very rude/insulting review for chapter 8, and since I cannot PM that person (they have PMs disabled) I just wanted to clear the air a bit - just in case any of you feel the same way. Meanwhile, I have NO IDEA where they came up with what they did. I never stated any of that, but rather said. . . **

**This is an Edward and Bella story. I _always_ aim for a HEA, and this story is NO different. There will be a HEA, ending with E/B together; however, this is a coming of age story. **

**And so, there will be mild heart fail *sorry for the spoiler* but I promise the angst level will remain low and comedy high, with exceptions. If you know my work, you know it doesn't last long. **

**Edward will learn quite a few lessons about love and life throughout this fic, and - as I have previously stated - he won't be the same person he in the end. It's all a part of the Book of Love! **

**In chapter four you break up, but you give it just one more chance . . . **

**Do you know of the song? Here's the link:** youtu (dot) be/_YvQdsfzVa4** (mind the (dot)s and spaces)**

**Ugh. I hate myself for the spoilage. What's the point? *face palm***

**Lastly, I find it disheartening to need to defend my work . . . once again. It makes writing for this fandom a solemn event, when I do it for fun. You know? :( It's no wonder SO many wonderful authors pull their stories. *smh* **

**In the words by BellaScotia. . . It takes a lot to put yourself out there as a writer and some people don't understand how damaging and undermining their personal comments can be.**

**_Rant Over_**

**Very sorry for that. So, here's the update. Please enjoy!**

**And thank you for sticking around!**

* * *

><p>"<strong>Made in the Shades"<strong>

_All you need is ignorance and confidence and the success is sure__._**** - Mark Twain****

**Chapter Eleven: The Classy Guy**

Before I left my car, I grabbed Bella's flowers and an after dinner mint. I had stolen a handful and shoved them in the glove compartment—just in case. Tonight I wanted a kiss.

In the future—if I'm lucky—I'll replace the mints with prophylactics.

Even that scary-as-fuck sex talk with my father couldn't get me down. I was so chipper as I knocked on Bella's door.

That was until her father opened the door. "Can I help you?" Today, in the daylight, I was able to see that he was just as big as Emmett, and I wondered what Bella fed them. He wore his police uniform and had a pistol in his holster, again.

My eyes widened, suddenly a nervous wreck. All week at school, Emmett never said a word when he'd see us talking. I thought things were okay. "Uh, um…Is Edward home?" I gripped the flowers tightly and groaned when I realized my mistake. "I meant—"

He slammed the door in my face.

I was confused, since he was so nice to me the night I almost got that ticket.

"What happened?" I asked myself. Shaking my head and swallowing my heart, I knocked again. "Sir?"

This time Emmett opened the door. He didn't say anything. He didn't invite me in either. All he did was open the door and turn away from it.

"Hello?" I poked my head in.

"She's not ready yet." Emmett sat next to his father on the couch.

"Oh…" Slowly, I walked into the house and closed the door behind me before I entered the living room.

The parlor was nice and cozy and had mismatched furniture, but it fit. The room was also very neat. And looking into the neighboring dining room, I saw a carburetor on the table instead of candlesticks or china. There was no hint of anything feminine in this house. Besides the testosterone in the air, you could just tell that men occupied this house.

"Mr.—Chief Swan?" I held out my sweaty palm. "I am Edward Anthony Cullen…It's a pleasure to meet you again, sir."

He shook my hand quickly, and I tried to grip his hand back as hard as possible. "Have a seat, Edward." The chief pointed to a chair.

I rubbed my moist palm down my jacket as I took a seat.

And then it was quiet. They were watching television, and I kept looking around for Bella. "This is a great program." I pointed to _The George Burns and Gracie Allen Show_. They play old episodes in the early evening.

They both turned to look at me, and then back to the television.

"Cullen!" Paul shouted behind me.

Shocked again, I turned to the person who never greeted me by anything other than "Fuckward".

"Hello." I nodded.

Again, I was reminded that Bella lives with all men. Paul stood before me in a pair of jeans—that's it—and I hated that he actually had muscles.

"Are these for Bella?" He snatched her flowers out of my hands.

I stood up. "Yes." I reached for them.

He held them away. "They're nice." After exchanging a look with Emmett, he handed them back.

"Thank you." I sat down again, and I thought maybe Emmett was my ally. "Do you know when she might be ready?"

Emmett stared daggers at me. "What's the rush?"

I thought that was a trick question, so I didn't answer.

Paul laughed. "Look at how nervous he is. I bet this is his first date."

Looking down, I didn't deny or admit anything.

"Is that true?" Mr. Swan asked.

I opened my mouth to respond, but just nodded my head.

"Huh…" He mused, staring at me. "I heard from Mrs. Stanley that you're quite the ladies man."

"Um . . . she said that?" I couldn't help it and grinned, albeit nervously.

"What do they call those women, pumas or . . .?" Paul sat on the arm of the recliner I sat in.

"Cougars," Mr. Swan laughed. "Marcy sure is a hoot. I'm just busting your chops, Edward."

I blew out a breath.

"Yeah, don't be scared." Paul whacked my back so hard, I fell forward.

"Thanks." I looked down to the flowers in my hands.

"She's still Bella—like she is at school," Emmett said. "You'll just be wherever. You know?"

I smiled. "Right."

"And she's a chick. They take their time." Emmett shrugged. "Everything's okay…if she wanted to back out, we would've told you to leave."

"That's a relief," I whispered.

"She's up there with Ali and Rosie—"

"Ro-Rosalie?" I stuttered.

He nodded but didn't look at me.

When I saw the burgundy red of the cheer skirts coming down the stairs, I stood up.

"She's on her way." Alice smiled. "She looks so beautiful." She squealed but when Paul reached for her, she cringed back and frowned.

"Great." I blew out a breath, refusing to look at Rosalie. I couldn't do anything to fuck this up.

And my stomach was already filled with butterflies because of what Alice said.

How could Bella get any more beautiful than she already is? I didn't think it was possible.

"Hello, Edward," Rosalie greeted.

"Hey." I stared at the banister for a short moment, and then legs—bare gams came into view. Bella was wearing a light purple dress that only came down to her knees and a black cardigan sweater. In the middle—before the skirt flared out—I spied a ribbon tied into a bow by her bust that I wanted to undo with my teeth. Her hair was down in curls but pulled away from her face, and she was breathtaking—painfully gorgeous.

And I couldn't look away. "You—wow, Bella, you look—" I gulped. "Oomph!" I jumped when someone, Paul, elbowed me.

"Stop looking at her like that," he warned, so low in my ear.

I nodded, closing the distance to hand her the flowers. "Th-these are for you. I hope you like them."

Bella beamed at me. "I love them." She smelled them, holding them close to her nose before she locked eyes with me. "You look like Rock Hudson. I mean, you look . . . different." She tilted her head as she stared at me.

"You're—perfection." I huffed a breath and felt Paul lingering. But then I saw Emmett pull him away from me.

"Leave it," I heard Emmett whisper.

Bella smiled into the flowers again. "You didn't have to get me these."

"I wanted to. Th-the lady suggested roses, but…these reminded me of you."

"Wildflowers," Bella whispered.

"Like your hair," I whispered, stepping closer to her, and I didn't give a fuck that Emmett, Paul, and the chief were right on my tail.

"Edward?" I heard Rosalie ask.

I was caught off guard and looked to Rosalie, but my eyes went right back to my gorgeous lady. There was no comparison. My angel face was a T-bone, Rosalie might as well have been dog shit, and I wanted to eat Bella.

"Where are you taking our Bells?" Rosalie asked.

My eyes never left my date. "I hope you don't mind. I made reservations at La Bella Italia. It's Friday, and I just wanted to make sure we didn't have to wait. B-but we can go wherever. Wherever you want to go is fine-"

"That's not very assertive of you, son," Chief Swan commented.

My mouth opened, ready to ask, "What?" to inquire what he meant, but I found myself frowning down at Bella. She no longer looked happy, and that made my stomach ache.

"I just . . . well, I want her to h-have a good time," I whispered, even more anxious than before. All these people were staring at me, just waiting for me to mess this up, and I didn't want that to happen.

"Huh. . ." The Chief again.

"I cannot believe you, Charlie!' Alice snapped, waving a finger.

"What?" It was Charlie's turn to ask.

"You need a crash course in Women's Lib 101. That's all I'm saying. . . In fact, Edward just earned major points by taking Bella's feelings into consideration. Good job, Edward. _I think_ it's classy!" Alice was scaring me right now.

". . . you with your nonsense." And then Alice and Paul started to quietly argue, which surprised me yet again. As I have gotten to know Alice a little through Jasper, I don't think she can do anything quietly.

Bella grinned at me again. "Relax." She mouthed, her eyes looking around me.

I nodded, taking a deep breath.

"Reservations?" Emmett asked in a shocked-like tone. And again, I thought he might just be my ally this evening.

"Yes-" I started.

"Wow…you're a classy guy," Rosalie said, trailing a hand down my bicep. "Love this jacket."

I shrugged her off and hoped Emmett knew it was she and not I.

"Yeah, he _is_ a classy guy—my guy!" Bella grabbed my hand. "Come on, Edward."

My body jerked as she pulled me out of her house. "Nice meeting you—" I was polite and shut the door after myself.

Bella dragged me until we were on the porch steps. "Thank God." She wiped the lipstick off. "They were only trying to help but I hate this red crap, and I hate her," she whined. "It's my fault because I asked Alice if I could borrow a dress." She rambled, but it was cool. "Oh, I'm sorry—do you like lipstick?" She stopped taking it off.

Since my back was still kind of against her front door, I was able to hear laughing on the other side. They were spying on us and that bothered the fuck out of me.

I shook my head. "You don't need it. I always thought girls who wore too much makeup were like—trying to hide something. You don't need makeup…you're a natural beauty. Okay?"

"Wow," she sighed.

"So. . . I'm your guy?" The fact that she said that wasn't lost to me.

"Um. Crap." She looked away from me.

"Hopefully one day, I'll be lucky enough." I tried to play it off.

Then I took her hand in mine and escorted her to the car. The whole time, I felt multiple pairs of eyes staring from the windows of Bella's house.

It wasn't until we were on the road when I felt like I could breathe again. "Your dad seems cool. . . like a man of few words."

She shrugged. "What's there to say? If you step out of line, Emmett will kill you."

"Gee, thanks." I chuckled.

"Do you…plan to step out of line?"

"Do you want me to?" I panted.

"Maybe."

"Okay," I agreed.

She giggled. "Do you have any booze?"

I shook my head no. "Sorry."

She reached into her purse and pulled out a cigarette. "Do you mind?"

"Can I have one?" I asked.

She handed me a cigarette. Then while hers hung out of her mouth, she started to undress.

"What are you doing?" I swerved, getting a peek at some flesh.

"Watch the road!"

"Shit." I threw the cigarette out the window and smoothed my hair back.

"I'm fully clothed underneath, relax." She pulled pant legs down. "I can't wear this…I thought I could, but…do you mind?"

"Not at all…continue." I squirmed where I sat.

For the rest of the ride, I never took my eyes off the road. Yet, just knowing she was removing her clothing excited me to no end.

**…0.o…**

Bella in a dress was gorgeous. Bella wearing a fitted red peasant blouse that hung off her shoulders and some tight black pedal pushers was fucking hot—sexy. As soon as I saw her, my dick got hard.

Which negated all the poundage time I put in before our date.

"Cullen party of two?" I told the host, holding out two fingers and throwing Bella a wink. For just a second, I felt like the confident man I strived to be.

"Right this way, sir." He gestured into the dining room.

Being a gentleman, I placed my hand on the small of Bella's back and escorted her to the table. It's what Dad does with Mom.

She leaned into my touch, and she smelled like—girl.

"What are you doing?" she asked, as the maître d pulled out her chair.

I dropped the handful of hair I was holding to my nose, letting it fall on her shoulder.

"Your table, sir." He gave me a look.

I cleared my throat and refused to let him push Bella's chair in.

I could do that.

"Thank you." She smiled.

I beamed back at her and took my seat. "Thank _you_." Scooting closer, I hoped she didn't mind.

She looked down to the tablecloth. "Wow…this place is like_…Lady and the Tramp_."

Raising a brow, after hearing the word "Tramp", I leaned into her. "What are you saying?"

"The bread sticks, the candles…" And I realized she was talking about the cartoon I took Jared to see a few weeks back.

"Oh…" I nervously placed my hand on hers. "Did you want to get spaghetti and—"

"No." She shook her head.

"Okie-dokie." I stared at her, so happy she was here. "Can I tell you something?" I intertwined our fingers and stared at our joined hands, hoping the gesture was all right. Her hand was so small, and yet fit perfectly within my own.

"Of course," she waited, tightening her hold on me.

"This is my first date," I whispered, "like ever."

"No," she laughed.

"I'm serious. Thank you for accepting."

"Thank you for asking." She smiled so wide. "This is my first date, too."

I wanted to jump out of my skin with happiness.

She got the mushroom ravioli, and I got spaghetti and meatballs, since I just couldn't get that stupid flick out of my head. Luckily, when the food arrived, we didn't have to speak anymore. It was awesome.

"Why are you staring at me?" She covered her mouth with a napkin.

"You're beautiful," I said. "I'm not allowed to look?"

"Oh…" She blushed, and it made me chuckle. "You can." She pushed her plate away. "You want to get out of here?"

"Uh…wh-what did you have in mind?" I leaned in again.

"You said we'd go see a movie." She blinked a few times.

I nodded. "Oh…Drive-in?"

"Yes."

"Yes!" I fist pumped the air and gained the waiter's attention. "Sorry."

_Edward Cullen was going to the drive-in with Bella Swan. _

The possibilities seemed endless.

"Excuse me; we'll just have the check." I brought my voice down to a low baritone and held up my finger. It's what my dad does at restaurants. When he brought it over, I asked him to wait. Then I placed a few bills in the black folder and told him to keep the change with a nod.

"You're so…" Bella stared.

I slumped my shoulders. "What…?"

"Like suave and…you act older—not like the goons we go to school with—who would have taken me for pizza. That includes my brother, too," she laughed. "His idea of a date is…nothing close to yours. I didn't expect this."

I winked and kissed her knuckles, and I may have let my tongue hang out between my lips so I could taste her skin.

"Did you just lick me?"

"Do you have a problem with that…oh!" I put my hands up because I had no idea where that came from. "I'm—" I wanted to apologize.

"No…I don't have a problem." She shook her head, staring at my mouth.

"Amazing." I stared right back again.

Unfortunately, the same movie we saw last week at the drive-in—although with different friends—was still playing this weekend. After I paid, tuned into the station, and found a spot, I turned to Bella.

"Did you want a—something?" I jerked my thumb back to the concession stand.

"Popcorn?"

I nodded. "Can I say something else?"

She turned back to me. "Edward…you can say whatever you want." I knew she was getting tired of that question.

"I'm not usually this dense," I whispered, staring down and feeling like a fool. "You're—well, you're you. My dad showed me all the grownup stuff. And I know it's not 1935…Sorry for all the old-fashioned crap." I drew in a shaky breath, which paused when Bella grasped my chin and turned me to face her.

"I think you're really sweet." She lightly kissed the corner of my mouth. Well, really my cheek. "And I'm having a really good time. I loved dinner and everything, but just being with you. . . it's nice."

My face never moved, hoping she'd kiss me again.

"You make me feel like a lady."

"You make me feel like a caged animal." I covered my mouth with my hand.

She pulled it away. "Why's that?" I swore to Christ she pushed her chest out.

"Everything." I eyed her, drinking it all in. When I felt my dick harden, I rushed out the car. "Popcorn!" I shouted.

When I turned around to make sure she was still there, Bella was hanging out of the cab. Her breasts were threatening to fall out of her top. "Hurry back!" Then her eyes widened, and she slid back into the car.

"How's your date, Cullen?" Emmett asked.

Whipping around to him, I almost fell on my ass. His whole gang was here, even Rosalie, who looked like she hated me right now. What the fuck was her problem?

"I just—I came—"

"You came? When?" Jimmy laughed.

"Cool it." Emmett held up his hand.

Calming down, I realized this wasn't a confrontation. Emmett was being nosy, and those people follow him everywhere. "I'm on my way to get popcorn. Excuse me." Easing my way between them, I didn't stop until I was on line.

"Edward!"

I breathed a sigh of relief when I turned to Jasper and Ben. "How's it going?" Jazz asked.

I nodded. "Swell." I gazed up at the menu.

"How far did you get?" Ben asked.

I shook my head. "I'm still in the dugout." My face fell again. All this sex stuff was really taking the fun and excitement out of my date.

Without any more interruptions, I placed my order. I got us two Coca-Colas, a huge bucket of popcorn, and Jasper told me to get something chocolate—it has natural aphrodisiacs in it.

On my way to the car, Rosalie gave me a hard push, and I almost lost the popcorn. "What's wrong with you?" I asked.

"Me?" She pointed to herself. "You took Bella on _my _date."

"What? You're crazy," I whispered, hoping Emmett didn't hear me.

"You said you'd take me to La Bella Italia…and here." She placed her hand on her curvaceous hips. "Eyes up here, Cullen."

"Um…" I closed my eyes tightly, hating myself for looking.

"Emmett and I don't go steady. We just hang out. Most people don't know that. So…technically, if you still wanted to ask me out, you could."

I didn't reply.

"I really wanted to go with you, Eddie." She ran her hands up my chest and leaned into me.

I gulped, and then saw Jasper dry humping the air behind her. It made me laugh. "Sorry."

"Everything is a joke to you!" She sounded like my father.

"No," I said. "Back off." I can't say that to my father.

"We make sense." Rosalie waved a finger between us. "You come from a great family…If I settled down with Emmett, I'd be taking calls at Swan's Garage until I die. We—me and you—can go places."

I shook my head. "Where the heck are we going?" I was confused.

"I like you, and you continue to screw it up." She pushed my hair back and gazed into my eyes. "I'm not going steady with Emmett. I _never _say yes, which is why we fight; but if you asked—_you, Edward_—I _would_ say yes."

"What?" I shouted. "You don't even know me. I wanted to get to know you on an intimate level, but…not anymore." I shrugged. "Goodnight, Rosalie."

When I turned my back, she threw a rock at me. "I hate you, Edward."

"Feeling's mutual, ice cunt!" I spat back to her, not feeling bad about it. If my mother ever heard me speak that way she'd kill me, but in my eyes, Rosalie wasn't a lady.

"What was that?" Emmett suddenly had his arms folded in front of me.

Everything inside me wanted to drop the shit in my arms and join a fucking circus—just get out of this crazy town.

Instead, I chose this moment to risk my own ass. "Rosalie…" I pursed my lips, looking around him to my car. Bella wasn't hanging out the cab, and I hoped she didn't run away. "I know you heard what I said. And I hope you heard what she said to me—"

"I didn't." His face fell, which made me sad for him. Emmett really isn't a bad guy. It's heartbreaking to think he's caught in Rosalie's web of evil. Now that I'm not hung-up on her anymore, I've noticed a few things. Emmett is on her hook. He loves her. You can tell when they're together.

"It's not important…Can you let me pass?"

And for some reason, he stepped to the side. "I don't know what your deal is…you must have it bad for my sister. No guy has ever—"

"Even if you punched my lights out right now, she'd still be worth it." I grinned to myself. "So…" I straightened up.

"She's to be home by eleven."

I nodded. "Have a pleasant evening."

Finally, I closed the distance to my car and put the refreshments on the roof. Since it's so nice out, I thought Bella might like to hang out on the hood. But to my surprise, Bella wasn't in the cab.

"Hey, you," she whispered behind me, in the back-fucking-seat.

"Oh…come back up here." I patted the seat, a nervous wreck. "I got you candy, um..." I turned to her, and she started to pull me into the backseat. "What are you doing?" I went willingly, and then her mouth was on mine.

My heart threatened to leap out of my chest for the briefest of seconds, and then her lips were gone.

Bella's warm, sweet breath washed over my face, her breathing labored. "I saw what you did. I couldn't hear, but I know you turned her down, and now you're here with me." She bit my lip and pulled it into her mouth.

"Ohmigaw…" My hips did a little dance.

"I'm sorry. It just happened." She covered her lips. "I didn't mean—It just happened, like . . . instinct."

"You have great intuition. Don't ever be sorry for that, um—" My arms rested on both seats, the back and the front, and I was holding myself in place.

"Kiss me," she said.

I shook my head no. "I—I—"

She closed the distance again to kiss me very lightly—a lingering, toe-curling kiss—and I forgot how to breathe. When I turned my head to pant, I felt her placing kisses along my neck. "Oh, God…"

She bit my earlobe. My eyes closed and I leaned my head into her. I never felt anything as good. "Edward?"

"Bella?"

We had a stare off. I was afraid to lose control, and she was testing it.

"It's okay." She scooted closer. "That's why I wore pants, so…we'd stay above the waist."

"Whose waist?" I swallowed, staring at her tits.

"Mine?" She stared at my crotch. "What's in your pocket?"

"Nothing…I'm just happy to see you."

She giggled. "Can you relax?" She shook my stiff shoulders. "I'm trying really hard to, but you're making me nervous."

Nodding, I turned and sat back. I pulled her into my side, and all this tension filled the car. "Can I kiss you _now_?" I know I'm a teenager, and everything seems like the end of the world, but if I didn't kiss her I was going to die.

"Are we going steady?"

I smiled. "You want that—to-to be my girlfriend?" I stammered. "You'll go to prom with me?"

"Only if you French kiss me…right now." She smiled and climbed into my lap.

I whimpered, because she was sitting right on my cock. "I—I have a Hershey Bar…Wanna split it?" I reached into the jacket.

"What's wrong with you?" She leaned away from me. "You were all sexy and debonair…and now…"

"I was what?" I heard "sex", and the rest didn't matter.

"Do you think I'm…am I rushing you?" She stared me. "I want to seal the deal. Edward, I—I've liked you since the first day. I've been waiting forever, but if you need more time…"

I went limp, my shoulders, not my cock. "No…not at all." I held her face. "Bella, you make me so nervous." I pulled her in closer. "You've called me an asshole how many times and…then you punched me in the face. I don't want to screw anything up tonight."

"Stay away from Rosalie, and we won't have any problems." She raised a brow.

I nodded.

She looked down. "Rosalie and Alice told me that if I wanted to go steady with you that I had to…do this. So, kiss me and let's make it official."

"Ice cunt."

"What?"

"Not you…yours is very warm." I tried not to focus on her hotness on my lap.

"Oh," she said. "I really like you."

"Same here, and I'd love to go steady with you and take you to prom. And you don't have to do anything—well, anything you don't want to do. Um, I'm nervous but also at your mercy." I rambled, moving my hips a little. "But…I don't deserve your sympathy, angel face. Please, have your wicked way—"

"Far out." She attacked my mouth.

And I pinned her to the backseat.

My tongue explored every inch of her mouth.

It's what came natural to me.

My hands rising to palm her breasts came natural, too.

Then there was a knock at the window. "Can I have your popcorn?" Tanya was peering into the backseat, and I didn't hear what she said.

I groaned. "Stay where you are," I told Bella below me.

"I'm not going…mmm," she kissed my neck, "anywhere."

"Fuck." My dick rubbed against her leg as I rolled down the window. I also took a huge breath once some fresh air filtered through. "What?" I asked Tanya.

"Hi, Bella!"

"Beat it, Denali." Bella started to pull my shirt out of my pants.

"What do you want?" I wanted her to go away, but I didn't want her to run to Emmett. I had to play nice, just like Bella was…ghosting her hands along my chest. "Shit."

"Can I have your popcorn? It's just sitting on the roof—"

Then Bella's hand came up, and she handed Tanya the candy bar.

"Hey…" I actually wanted that.

"Take whatever," Bella said.

"Fuck!" I shouted. She had pushed me, and then she was on top. I loved watching her tits jiggle as she rolled up the window. "You're a vision." She should always be on top of me.

There was another knock.

Bella groaned and cracked the window. "What?" She sounded sexy all snappy.

"Can I have a—"

"Tanya, take whatever you want." Bella closed the window.

My dick needed to rub against her, so I turned us over. "Hi." I pushed it against her. "Shit." I did it again and again.

"Whoa…big boy!" Bella sounded shaky.

"That's—that's me." I kissed her hand.

"It feels—" she swallowed, "really good, just…not so rough."

Biting my lip and trying to keep my weight off of her, I did it slowly.

"Fantastic," I sighed, closing my eyes.

"Oh, wow." She writhed, meeting my thrusts.

There was a knock.

"I'm going to kick her little ass!" Bella seethed.

I rolled down the window. "What?" This little girl was killing the mood, but I still wiggled my hips against my sexy date.

"Do you have a nickel?"

"Whoa!" I shouted. Bella pushed me back again and I went flying.

"Tanya," Bella's hair was a mess, "is someone telling you to keep bothering us?"

I sat up to look at Tanya—really look. She looked upset. "Yes," she whispered. "Rosalie said she'd give me a quarter if I—"

"I'll give you two dollars if you call her an ugly, share crop, snaggle-toothed, has-been ice cunt!" I shouted.

Tanya gasped.

"Say it again," Bella rubbed down my chest.

I swallowed reaching back for my wallet. "Here's two bucks…just leave!" And now I was officially broke.

"Thanks…Can you give me a ride home after the movie?"

"Emmett," Bella said. "Emmett, my brother? He told me yesterday that he thinks you're really pretty. He'll give you a ride home."

"I LOVE EMMETT!" she shrieked and ran so fucking fast.

Bella and I laughed our asses off. "What's a share crop?" she asked.

I shook my head. "It's what my father calls a slut…share crop." I smiled. "You're amazing." I placed a soft kiss on her nose.

"You missed." She pulled me on top of her.

And we were able to French kiss while my penis rubbed against her for another two minutes straight. But then I had to stop because I was going to explode.

"Edward," she sighed, pulling my hair.

"What?" I leaned away, panting. "Want me to stop? Holy crap." When I moved my thumbs, I felt her nipples through her brassiere and top, so I applied some pressure.

"Shit." She pushed her chest out.

"Does that hurt?" I looked down and lightly tickled them—to apologize—and, after a few seconds, they got bigger. "Neat-o." I breathed.

"Oh my God!" She spread her legs even wider, and so I had to rub against her again.

"Ohhh, you like that…" I pinched them and bucked my hips, and her eyes rolled back as she said my name again. It was the best thing in the world, and so I kept at it but kissed her as well.

"Wh-where'd you learn how to, to do this?" Bella sounded like she was crying, so I pulled away.

She wasn't crying. She was just a mess, just like me. "I just...I don't know. C-can I kiss them?"

"Um…" She covered her nipples with her hands.

My hand rubbed the soft skin of her stomach. "Oh, no…don't do that." Now I wanted to cry. "I'm sorry."

She shook her head no. "Not tonight."

"See them?"

"No."

"Okay." My head dipped low to capture her lips again.

After that kiss, Bella put the brakes on all things physical, and we actually watched the movie. It was neat-o-freeto because I had rounded second base—not once, but twice—and I had a date for prom.

I had a girlfriend, too.

And while we drove back to Forks, I wondered what that meant—for us. I know what going steady entails—like the bigger picture—but Bella wasn't like most girls.

"You have to pick me up for school every day and bring me home. And…you have to carry my books and walk me to class."

"Okay." I smiled.

"We have to sit together at lunch."

"Of course." I nodded.

"And prom…do you buy the corsage or do I?"

"I'll buy you ten," I said.

"One is fine." She leaned over and kissed my cheek. "Do you…um, like…what do you want from me?"

Briefly, I smirked at her. "Nothing." I grabbed a hold of her hand and held it on my thigh. "Being with you is enough."

"Wow," she sighed.

"Um…" I thought of something. "C-can you still wear my sweater?"

She nodded.

"How about my class ring when I get it?" I chanced a glance at her.

"Your pin…it's too soon for rings."

"Fine by me. I just want everyone to know we're together," I blurted.

"Me, too." She held my hand.

Before I pulled up to her curb, I parked on a side road to steal a goodnight kiss. There was no way I'd do it at her door. She understood and didn't think I was a pussy or anything. She called me respectful.

My mother would be so proud.

My father would think I'm a coward.

But, I managed to palm her breasts again, so I was happy.

"I had a great time." She stared up at me.

"You have no idea." I lightly touched her cheek, because I wanted to kiss her again so bad.

"Call me tomorrow?"

I nodded. "Definitely. Um…" I wanted to ask her out again tomorrow, but I had spent my entire allowance—what I had saved the past few weeks. "Did you want to come over for dinner tomorrow? We can listen to records…"

"And maybe dance?"

I smiled so wide. "Of course!" I wanted to dance right now, I was so fucking happy. "We might have to hang out with Peanut, though." I winced. "I'd feel bad excluding him, but if you—"

"It's fine, really. Jared isn't a bother…are you sure your mom won't mind?" She held her dress tightly to her chest.

I grinned. "My mother loves you." My head leaned down. "I'll call you tomorrow…so we can pick a time," I whispered, staring at her lips.

"Call me in the morning." She jumped up to kiss my lips quickly, and then she ran inside her house.

My ego was the size of Main Street. So, I turned to throw my keys in the air and catch them. "Yes!" I shouted.

"Ahem." Emmett cleared his throat, and I noticed what I didn't before. He and Rosalie were standing at the bottom of the porch.

"I saw your car rockin' at the drive-in," Rosalie smirked. "While you were talking to Jimmy, Emmett." She drummed her nails on his chest. "The windows were foggy too."

"It was humid tonight." I looked up to the sky, and then to Rosalie. "You owe me two dollars."

Emmett shook his head no. "We drove Tanya home. Consider us even."

"Fair enough." I grinned because nothing was going to get me down, but I turned to glare at Rosalie anyway. "The color green doesn't suit you," I mumbled, and ran down the porch.

"You're not going to say anything?" Rosalie smacked Emmett.

"Shut your mouth." He attacked hers, and she moaned out a loud one—clawing at his shoulders.

"Huh?" I nodded and entered my car, and I didn't stop until I got home.

**Thank you for reading.**

**Next we'll hear from Bella and some time will have gone by!**

**Please leave me your thoughts! **


	12. The War Within

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Okay, so...here we have a BPOV. Now, before you read, I just wanted to make a comment. Bella's like head-over-heels for Edward. We all see him as a-dork-able, but Bella sees him as the sexy, suave Edward. Jsyk...So, even if he does something weird or stupid, she's going to see it differently—this is through her eyes.**

"**Made in the Shades" **

**Chapter Twelve: The War Within**

_Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest._** - Mark Twain**

**Bella POV**

"Try not to miss me," I teased, rising to my toes and hoping Edward would kiss me.

He raised a brow and looked behind me. "That's easier said than done." He gazed into my eyes now, and it might as well have been my soul. "Are we hanging out after school or…" He held my chin.

I licked my lips. "Yes…no work today." I looked away from him. Actually, I'd lied to Emmett and told him I was sick.

"Awesome." Edward softly kissed my lips, and we earned a few whistles.

"Miss Swan," Mrs. Green called from inside the classroom.

"Sorry." I winced and hopped up to kiss Edward quickly. "Meet me here after." I jumped to kiss him again.

And I can't figure out why, but I just can't stop kissing him.

Since none of my friends have cooking class this period, I spent the hour burning a Bundt cake, daydreaming about Edward, and counting down the minutes until school was over.

Even when the bell sounded, I tried to take my time. Edward has gym, and so it takes him a few minutes to come back to my class. School is over now. It doesn't make a difference, and I don't mind waiting for him.

"Emmett said you were sick," Jimmy said, suddenly at my side.

I leaned back against the hall wall and nodded. "My throat." I made my voice sound raspy.

"Oh." He frowned and looked concerned. "I can go home…switch my bike for my mom's car—that way the wind won't—"

"Hey, you." Edward grabbed me and pulled me into him.

"Hey." I forgot about the rasp.

"Hey, Jim," Edward said, leaning his chin on my head and tightening his hold around my waist.

I turned in his arms to face Jimmy. "Thanks…but—"

Jimmy wasn't looking at me, but glaring above me—at Edward.

"Um…" I became nervous.

"See you around, Bella." Jimmy didn't even look at me as he started to back away from us. Once he turned around, so did I.

"What was that about?" I asked.

Edward swallowed, shaking his head. "Nothing…do you need to stop at your locker?" He took hold of my hand as we started to walk.

"Nope. I got everything before last period."

He smiled. "So did I…now let's go." He took my books from me.

Edward practically pulled me out of the school and into his car, while I laughed and tried my hardest to keep up with him. "Are we waiting for Jasper?"

Edward closed my door and raced to his side. "Nope…He got a ride from Jake." He started the car.

"Aren't you forgetting something?" I tapped my lips.

"Forget? No…never—" He attacked me.

My body flew back from his weight, but it was welcomed. His tongue explored my mouth, and I moaned into his. Everything about Edward makes me tingly and excited in the best way. My heart beats a million times a minute—all from him. These days, just looking at him gets me excited. He's easily the most handsome guy at school, and I'm crazy about him.

"We—" I panted as his hands went up my shirt, and he kissed down my neck, "should leave the parking lot at least."

Edward stopped, taking his hands back. "Is anyone at your house?"

This was where I became nervous. No one is at my house. Emmett and Paul will be at the garage until seven, and Dad won't be home 'til eight. It wouldn't be a problem if I thought we could control ourselves.

For the past couple of weeks, I always wear pants—partly because I want him to touch me, down below, in the worst way. Sometimes I think I'm ready—I want it so bad—and then I'm just so scared.

If we're alone, I have no excuse, except my own anxieties. "C-can we go to your house?"

He nodded. "Whatever you want."

I smiled and nestled into his side while he drove out of the lot.

Today, I refrained from giving him small kisses on his neck. Yesterday, he almost swerved off the road.

He's so sexy, mature, and yet adorable at the same time.

_I love him. _

As soon as I thought that, I pulled away and scooted to my side of the seat.

"What's wrong?" Edward picked up my hand to kiss my knuckles.

"Nothing," I lied and slid down the seat. We were about to pass the garage. "Pass it fast," I whispered, like Emmett might hear me from a block away.

Edward chuckled, but didn't speed up.

"Cullen! Where's my sister?" I heard Emmett shout.

"Uh…" Edward came to a stop, and I guess we were at the light.

"Angela's," I said.

"She went to Angela's house," Edward replied. "See ya!"

We started moving again.

"What was that about?" he asked.

I shrugged and slowly sat right. "I told him I was sick…I was supposed to be there today."

He nodded. "Sorry…um, we could have hung out tomorrow…I'm actually hoping we can double."

"With who?" I asked.

"Jake's taking out some junior. I don't even know her name. He had asked, so..." Edward pulled into his driveway, and I noticed we were the only car here. Crap. That kind of defeated the purpose of coming here. Although, I remember Edward telling me that no one was allowed inside while his parents weren't home.

I calmed myself down, thinking rationally, even though logic flies out the window when I'm with Edward. "Sure…We're still going to see _Invasion of the Body Snatchers_, right?"

Edward wore a silly grin while he shut down the car. "I'll be there to hold you if you get scared." He raised a brow at me, but his eyes were smoldering—saying so much, like he adored me, wanted me.

All I could do was sigh.

"Maybe that's why I choose scary movies." He scooted closer to me.

"That's a dirty trick—"

"I love holding you." He wrapped his arms around me.

"I love being held—"

"I love—"

This time, I cut him off with my mouth and pushed him back. He pulled me onto his lap to rub that ginormous thing on me. My hands always itch to touch it, but I have no idea what to do with it.

And so, my hands always find a home in his hair, while my hips move against him.

"Fuck…you feel so good," he whispered, and then kissed down my neck. But then we both jumped when a horn sounded. It was Edward's, as my ass was leaning on it.

We laughed.

"Backseat?" he asked.

"Sure," I agreed.

We climbed over the front seat, and then we went for each other again. My back met the backseat quickly, while Edward pushed my skirt up—so it pooled around my waist.

And this is the reason I wear pants under.

"M-maybe we should stop." I panted.

He was off me fast. "I'm sorry." He trailed his hand through his hair. "I didn't—I didn't mean to—fuck!" He berated himself.

"It's okay…I mean, I'm okay. I just…" I swallowed, not sure what I was getting at. "We just get too carried away _so_ fast."

"I have, um, a condom in my wallet…if we ever."

"A what?" I asked.

His eyes widened. "A prophylactic. You know what that is, right?"

"Oh…_oh_!" Now I knew what he was saying. "Wow…um." I looked down to my hands.

"It's just in case. We don't ever have to…" He squeezed my thigh.

"We've only been going steady like three weeks, and I know we hang out every day, but…you know?" I looked to him. "If you need to, I mean, I want you to be happy." I was afraid he'd break up with me and that scared me more than anything.

"Bella." He picked up my chin and made me face him. "Just us being…just you being my girl…makes me happy." He looked so sincere, and yet nervous. "Okay? I just—I shouldn't have brought it up. I just wanted you to know that if _you_ wanted to—like I said, I'm at your mercy—I'm prepared…maybe not mentally, but I have protection." He rambled.

And all I wanted was his mouth again. "Kiss me."

And he did.

This time around, I didn't think and just let him do. It wasn't until my nipple was between his teeth that I realized what we were doing, but that didn't mean I wanted him to stop. "Oh my God…" My back arched, and I hugged his head to me. His mouth felt amazing, sending an electric current throughout my body. "Don't stop." My hips wiggled below him, and I reached to touch him.

I palmed him through his slacks, rubbing over the fabric—wanting so bad to please him. His teeth bit harder and his hips bucked into my hand, and then he stiffened. "Fuck…" He growled out through clenched teeth.

"Sorry." I took my hand back, staring at his screwed up face. "I'm really sor—"

"Shit…" He pushed himself against my thigh once more before he went limp on top of me. "That—that was awesome." He panted into my neck.

"Wh-what happened?" I asked, because I thought I had hurt him.

He shook his head, and then dipped it low to kiss along my breast again. "Nothing. . . you're so good." He bit down, making me cry out.

Then we both jumped when there was a knock on the window.

"Fuck!" Edward sat up and pulled my shirt down.

I covered my face, since I_ couldn't_ face Mrs. Cullen—who was peering into the window.

"Edward…Bella." She tapped the glass again. "The both of you…in the house…now!" She didn't sound happy at all.

We watched as she walked away from the car. Jared followed her, and they were both carrying grocery bags with them.

"I'm sorry. I'll take you home, and she can scream at me," Edward said.

Even if I was scared, my heart broke—thinking that Mrs. Cullen might think less of me. "No…I have to go in."

Edward kissed my cheek. "I'm sorry."

"So am I."

Instead of trying to right my now wrinkled skirt, I just slipped it off. My slacks weren't a mess, but they sadly didn't match my top. "Do I look okay?" I asked as we left the car.

Edward came around to grab my hand. "You look gorgeous." He kissed my hair.

"I mean…my clothes," I giggled, because he nodded again; meanwhile, he didn't even look.

"After you, my love." He opened the door for me.

I beamed at him, even in my nervous state. He doesn't realize just how much those little sentiments mean to me. He's so sweet. "Stop making me smile. We're in trouble." I poked his stomach.

He held my hand to him. "It'll be okay. It's just my mom. . . Either way, it was worth it." He lifted my hand to kiss my palm.

I furrowed my brow—not sure why his mother's opinion mattered so much to me.

"I'm in the kitchen!" Mrs. Cullen called out to us.

"How does she know?" Edward asked the ceiling. "She always knows when I'm around…or eavesdropping." His admission made me laugh again while we walked into the kitchen.

But then my lips drew a tight line when I was faced with Mrs. Cullen's back as she emptied the shopping bags.

"Edward? Can you give us a minute?" She turned to look at us.

I bit my lip and stared at my hands.

"Is that necessary?" Edward asked. "I apologize about what you saw. It was me, not her—"

I winced when I realized what she might have seen—my breast in Edward's mouth. "Oh my God." I breathed, covering my face.

"Out." She pointed, and Edward kissed my hair before he left. "Have a seat." Mrs. Cullen gestured to a chair.

Slowly, I walked to take it. "Mrs. Cullen I-I—" I had no idea where to start.

She took a seat across from me, and she didn't look angry at all. "Before I met you…I knew who you were," she started. "I had met your father—about the same time we moved here." She stood up again. "I'm sorry. Would you like something to drink, dear?"

"Um…sure."

Then I watched as she poured two glasses of iced tea from a fancy pitcher. It looked like crystal. Everything about Mrs. Cullen—from the dinnerware she served her meals on to the shoes she wore—was fancy. She was so glamorous, what I imagined my mom might be like. Dad says Renee was so beautiful, the pictures he has of her don't do her justice. Although she left him, he's never spoken badly about her, and always chastises Em and me for doing so.

"I hope it's not too sweet." She served me with a smile.

"I'm sure it's perfect," I whispered before I took a sip. It was a little on the sugary side, but still good. "It's delicious."

"Edward…after I make a pot of tea, the boy has to sneak a pound of sugar in." She shook her head. "I usually leave the sugar out," she sighed, staring at me.

I nodded, not sure what else to do. "Edward likes sugar." I had no idea if he does, but I like it.

Her grin stayed in place while she nodded. "Your father cares a lot about you, but…he worries. We've spoken on a few occasions. Just two days ago I saw him at the hardware store. He commented, wondering just _how_ close you and Edward are."

"I know he worries…but…I didn't know he told the whole town." I frowned.

"He knows you spend a lot of time here."

"He does?" I was surprised.

Her face fell. "Don't you tell your father when you visit?"

"Um…he's usually working, so…" I squirmed in my seat.

"Right." She nodded. "Bella," she took hold of my hand, "about what you and Edward were doing—"

Her tone scared me, and I found myself frantic. "It'll never happen again, I swear. Please—please don't tell my father," I cried. Tears filled and spilled from my eyes, and I was so frightened. "He'll tell my brother. They tell each other everything. And they'll never let me see Edward again. I—I—that can't happen." I swallowed.

"Oh…dear, relax." She stood up and crouched down to hug me. "Relax." She rubbed circles into my back. "I'd never. What we talk about doesn't have to leave this kitchen, okay?"

I sniffled and smelled her hair. She smelled like flowers and Chanel Number Five. There's an old bottle in my dad's closet. It used to be my mother's.

"It's okay." She pulled away to smile and wipe my tears away. "I just wanted to talk to you about a few things."

"Okay." I took over clearing my face while she took her seat again.

"I thought—well, I thought you might have questions. I'm sorry that your mother isn't around, and… I don't feel it's right for you to have to turn to your friends for this kind of information. Girls your age don't know their asses from their elbows." She chuckled. "Your father mentioned that you don't have…an older female in your life, but that you have friends—your brother's girlfriend and your cousin's girlfriend?" She looked to me.

I nodded. "Rosalie and Alice."

"Okay…well, what's right for them—like what they do—may not be right for you. And…you may think you have to do what they do, but you don't."

I nodded again.

"What do you know about sex?" she asked.

"Um…" My face was set ablaze.

"You don't have to be shy. It's just us and what we say stays between us. You kids are lucky, you get a video." She winked. "All we got was a talk on our wedding night, and for me it wasn't necessary," she whispered the last part.

"Oh…" I sat up straight. "The projection was simple. It told us about, um, our first periods and what changes we'd have—the natural normal process leading to being a mother. I had already had my period for a year by the time I saw it. My father had Mrs. Levine, my next door neighbor, show me how to do all that stuff." I shrugged. "It told us about sex as a purpose to having children and stuff…um…that's it really."

"And you know how sex is performed?" she asked.

I nodded, looking down.

"I only ask because sexual education for boys is different. They get a more…instructional education regarding it—leaving it basically up to the male when it comes time for couples to be intimate."

"A lot of things are different for boys and girls," I mumbled.

"It's sad, isn't it?" she sighed, sitting back. "Sometimes our bodies might be ready—might react, but our brains aren't. Do you understand?"

"I do…" And boy did I.

Her face fell and now she looked shy. "After my graduation from high school…Dr. Cullen and I were so in love. We were so happy, but then he had to go away for school. My family didn't have the means to send me, but…back then—I'll tell you the truth—college was just a place people sent their daughters to find a husband. I knew I already had one in Carlisle." She smiled now. "So…I stayed behind. We grew up in the outskirts of Chicago, and my family had a farm. That's what I did when he first went away. I stayed behind to help out." She paused, sipping her tea.

"Let me backtrack a bit—sorry."

I put up a hand. "It's fine."

"Before Carlisle left for Cornell—that's the university he attended in New York—I wanted to…give myself to him. A part of it was fear that I might lose him—I can admit that now. And another part…well, it sort of just happened. I didn't even think about it. It just—" she giggled, looking more like a girl now instead of the refined woman she usually is. "It was scary—only, I didn't realize how scary until it happened."

"Did it hurt?" I whispered. "Um…my friend…she's not really my friend. She's my brother's girlfriend. She said it hurt, like really bad." By now I was eager for whatever information she might give me. "We have a—thing. I forgot what it's called."

"A hymen or cherry. And yes, it was uncomfortable the first time."

"Oh…" I sat back.

"It's normal to feel pain and to bleed just a bit," she said.

I nodded. "Rosalie said she bled, too."

"It's normal." She waved a hand.

"You didn't wait until you were married?" I asked.

"Many people don't. It's the Christian thing to do, and people say they do, but no one talks about it."

"Right," I agreed.

"Anyway—" she sipped her drink again, "we did it a few weeks before he left, and then we continued." She widened her eyes. "It was swell thereafter." She pursed her lips. "Then he went off to school, and I stayed behind. And then…well, by mid-October I became sick or what I thought was an illness."

"What happened?" I was on the edge of my seat, eager for what she might say.

"I was with child—with Edward."

I gasped and then covered my mouth. "I'm sorry—I didn't mean—"

She chuckled. "It's quite all right, dear." Her hand came to rest on mine. "I thought my life was over, and I sent a telegram to Carlisle—telling him to call the local drug store right away. I waited in that little shop for hours." She shook her head. "My parents didn't have a telephone. Heck, they finally got one, but only when we moved from Illinois in 1945."

"You guys used to live there? I mean, Edward?" I asked.

She nodded. "When Edward was six, we moved to Seattle. Carlisle had a friend he had met in the war. Carlisle was a medic, as he was still in med school at the time. His friend was a surgeon working for the Navy. His buddy had offered him a great position for when he came back and was through with medical school. Once Carlisle finished, he then decided to take him up on it."

"Dr. Cullen served during World War II?" I asked. "When did he serve?"

"He went overseas in 1942." She winked. "He never saw any _real_ combat. He worked at the hospital, not in the field, and was away for maybe six months—stationed in Belgium. He volunteered to go as a civilian. When he left, I had a flat stomach, when he came back…" she laughed, "I was seven months pregnant with Jared."

"Wow," I giggled.

"Carlisle was propositioned again, sadly when he was training to be a surgeon, but the war only went on for another couple of months until he came home," she sighed. "That's when I worried, mostly because Jared came a little early. It wasn't like Carlisle could refuse at that point, and we had no idea how long he'd be away. He had to go, but luckily he came home alive, the war had been won, and—because he had so much training—he wasn't held back from finishing his residency on time."

I nodded. "That's great."

"I got a little off track again." She winced. "My intention isn't to scare you, but…I'm sure you've heard, despite the pain of your first time, that sex is wonderful and all that…from your friends?"

"Um…I only know two girls that went all the way, and they keep doing it so…" I shrugged. "I don't really talk to Rosalie like that anymore. We used to be kind of close, but. . . I don't know. Sorry. What were you going to say?" I didn't want to tell Mrs. Cullen that my falling out with Rosalie was due to Edward. Once she set her sights on him, it was like this invisible gauntlet had been thrown, and we were suddenly enemies—vying for Edward's attention.

She was staring at me and smiling so wide. "You make my Edward so happy."

"He makes me happy, too." My cheeks got hot again.

She patted my hand. "I_ was_ pregnant before I was married. No one knew, since Carlisle and I were quick _to_ marry, and he transferred schools—wanting us to be near our families, since he was so busy. It just—it wasn't easy. I don't regret anything—I regret nothing, but if I knew then…what I knew now? I probably would have waited until we were married. Being intimate was great, but at that time…I couldn't—I wasn't mentally prepared for what came from it. For a young couple so in love . . . all the stress, it put a strain on our relationship. Sadly, we had drifted apart, and weren't close again until Edward was almost a year old." She wore a frown now. "Speaking of, relationships are hard without adding to them. Do you understand?"

"I do. . . you guys are okay now, though?"

Her cheeks became flushed. "We're better than ever. The sex is even better," she spoke to her tea. "Oh!" She looked back to me. "Um."

I grinned, and enjoyed talking to her like this. "It's okay."

"Just like you, I don't have someone to talk to. I'm home all day," she sighed.

"Wh-why is it better now?" I cleared my throat.

She pursed her lips. "I remember my mother telling me I'd—that my hormones would revert to one of a girl when I hit my mid-thirties, but I didn't believe her," she giggled. "We're settled. We're still in love, and things are just—I don't know."

"You guys are happy," I said.

"Very much so." She nodded.

"And. . . you don't mind being a house wife?"

She shook her head no. "It's a full-time job—the bills, the meals, the laundry, being a zookeeper." Her eyes widened. "I enjoy caring for my family."

I nodded and paused with my mouth open.

"You can talk to me." She raised a brow and resembled Edward for a second.

It made me smile. "Sometimes. . . I-I don't know." I looked down. "My dad acts like I have to get married. And I always thought that was just it. Since I was a kid, I liked reading and school, but I also never cared if I passed. . . since I'd likely get married." I rubbed the sweat away from my glass. "Emmett, my brother, he wants me to go to college. Even if I do, I'll be what? A secretary, a nurse, or a teacher?" I frowned. "None of that appeals to me. I don't know what I want, but I want the choice. Meanwhile, I had baby dolls when I was little, and-" My sight became blurry when tears filled my eyes. "When my mom left, I was so young and I used to promise my babies—they were dolls—that I'd never leave them." I wiped my eyes. "I've always wanted to be a mom, but everything else. . . I'm sorry. The only person I ever told that to was Edward."

She grinned. "You talk to Edward about that stuff?"

My stomach tied in knots. "Despite what you saw. . . we talk a lot. Edward is so easy to talk to." I shook my head. "I can say anything, and he doesn't—he doesn't judge or tease me. He's a great listener and very open-minded."

She chuckled. "I often forget he's my son. I can become. . . long-winded." She winked. "Does he open up to you, too?"

I nodded. "He's easily the most honest person I know."

She gave my hand a squeeze. "There's nothing wrong with wanting to be a mother. You young girls—" She tsked. "You're pulled each way. You have society and your parents—or your father in your case—pressing you to marry. And then you have the feminists, telling you to strive for your goals and be independent. It really sends a mixed message, as I can see a girl being torn, thinking they can only have one or the other. The main thing is that you do what makes you happy. If college is what you want, go for it. You can settle down and have children after, but don't think you can't have both and have to choose. Although, I also agree with being independent, relying on yourself. Only you can make Bella happy—marriage, children, or a power-job won't do that for you." She sipped her tea.

I smiled so wide because that sounded like the best advice ever.

"What my main concern is—what I meant to say—until you can handle the ramifications of sex, don't have it. Again, you have to use your own judgment, do what's right for Bella." She blew out a breath. "Whew…I could use a drink now."

I was still smiling at her, and wanted to hug her so badly. She spoke to me, not about me. My heart was filled with joy and a sense of longing, as I wished I had her around while I was growing up.

I was also a little confused, as I wasn't sure what to think, but I knew I wasn't ready for intercourse—regardless of what Edward might have in his wallet.

"Will you be joining us for dinner?" She stood up to push her chair in.

"Um. . . only if I can help you cook." I stood up too.

"I'd love that." She closed the distance and enveloped me in a hug.

…_**0.o…**_

"What do you know about sex?" I asked Alice as I closed my locker. My neck also craned to make sure Edward couldn't sneak up on me.

Alice shrugged. "What about it, specifically?" She turned to me. "My mom told me some stuff, why?"

I shook my head. "Mrs. Cullen…she caught Edward and me fooling around, so—"

"Oh, golly…that must have been horrible!" She covered her mouth.

I laughed and pulled her hand away. "It really wasn't. She's cool, not like your stuffy old mom."

"She's old fashioned," Alice sighed, "and a devout Christian woman. I'm surprised she even said the word penis when she talked to me."

"I bet." I saw Edward across the hall. He was laughing hysterically while he spoke to Jasper.

"Quick…this way." Alice pulled me down another corridor.

I giggled as I let her drag me away.

"Jasper's just…I said yes to prom, but he won't leave me alone now!" She groaned. "Sometimes it's easier to ignore him."

I hugged her tight. "He must be so happy."

"It's six weeks away…a lot can happen in six weeks." She looked away from me.

"Like what?" I asked.

She shrugged. "I just don't want to get too close. I still haven't chosen a school. I know he'll follow wherever. He thinks I don't know, but I do." She pointed to her temple.

"You know you like him. And I know you've liked him for a while." I bumped my hip to hers. "I loved you with Paul, but with Jasper…Ali, you're so happy."

"He really is handsome. I don't know why he's not popular with girls." She grinned and tried to hide it. "Do you know what people are going to say—when we show up at prom together?"

I frowned. "Who cares? That's not the Alice I know talking. Since when do you care about stuff like that?"

"I do…Rosalie's about ready to disown me. She wants me back with Paul, said I shouldn't be seen with a nosebleed like Jasper—and she said I couldn't cheer at the game this weekend." She gasped and faced me. "Ben Cheney is having a party this weekend, after we play Port Angeles. You better watch Rosalie. With Edward being the starting pitcher—" She shook her head. "She's going to be all over him."

My stomach rolled with nausea. "I'll just—I'll suggest we don't go to the party."

"Do you really want to be that kind of girlfriend?"

"No…but like…I hate having to compete with Rosalie for Edward's attention. I don't have to anymore…he ignores her, which is so cool. I just hate what she's doing to Emmett. You know? I know Emmett dates other girls too—"

"Their relationship is a complete joke, if you ask me." Alice looked like she wanted to say more, but wouldn't. "What were you saying earlier, about sex?"

"Oh…like…I remember you saying you never did anything below the belt with Paul. Is that really true?" I asked.

She giggled. "No."

"What do you mean?" I grabbed her by her biceps, but then I remembered what Mrs. Cullen said. Just because Alice did that, it doesn't mean it will be okay for me. I relaxed a little. "Sorry." I let go of her.

"I let him feel around down there and it was good—like really good—like when he touched the button on top."

"The what?" I asked.

"It felt amazing when he touched it, and it wasn't inside, so it was okay. I think he said it was called a. . . um, anyway, I wasn't ready for the gusto." She made a face. "Have you ever seen a penis?"

I shook my head. "Only in books, like the anatomy section of my biology book."

"They're really ugly and huge when a cat's worked up. My God." She stuck out her tongue. "Rosalie said she put Emmett's in her mouth—"

"Stop!" I smacked her arm.

She laughed at me. "I don't even know what that's called. It's like _blowing off steam_ or something."

"I felt Edward's…and it was awesome." I smiled.

"Look at you…wild woman!" She hugged me. "If you care about him, you guys should totally do it before he goes away to college, but _only_ if you love him. Loving each other makes it okay and prom night makes it special."

At the mention of Edward leaving, my stomach tied in knots. I'm still in school for another year, and we never discussed what would happen when he'd go away.

"But you have a few months before he leaves, so you have time."

"When...?" I barely managed to say.

She shrugged. "He'll probably leave—most schools start the middle of August."

"Oh. . ." My face fell even more. "That's three months. Ali, that's not enough time."

"What?" She looked back to me, and now I was able to see Edward and Jasper coming toward us.

"I didn't—I didn't think I'd feel so much so quick," I whispered.

"Huh?" She looked confused. "You love him."

"I think so," I barely said.

"Hey you." Edward took my hand and pulled me into him.

I jumped, throwing myself at him to hug him tight.

"Angel face...what's wrong?" He pulled back to look at my face.

"Nothing. Just—just hug me." I buried my face in his neck and hated lying to him, but I didn't want him to know. So, I quickly tried to change the subject. "Alice, what's that button thing you were talking about?" I looked to her from around Edward. The best thing about being with Alice and Jasper was that Edward and I could be ourselves, even ask silly questions.

Her eyes widened and she blushed. "Bella, um, I-wow."

"What's going on?" Jasper put his arm around her.

"What was that?" Edward looked confused, so I pulled him down to me.

"Female anatomy, um, the button. . . on top?" I even wracked my brain, thinking back to anatomy.

"Button? Like. . . on a pussy?" Edward swallowed.

I nodded.

Edward turned to raise a brow at Jasper.

"Stop," I laughed and made him look back to me. "I'm not stupid. I just forgot."

He palmed my cheeks. "No one said you were stupid. I-I think, um, you mean—"

"The bald man in the boat!" Jasper threw his head back.

"Clit!" Alice shouted like she won a prize, which gained a few curious glances.

I gasped. "Yes. . . the clitoris!"

"Yes!" Alice nodded.

I nodded. "I know what you mean. I-" I realized Edward and Jasper were now in my face, hanging on my every word. "Forget it." Maybe I'd tell Alice about my self explorations, but I definitely wasn't telling Jasper. Would I tell Edward if he asked? I had no idea.

Alice laughed, and I hugged onto Edward.

Later that day, we—Edward and I—found ourselves necking in another driveway—mine. Emmett was still at the garage with Paul, and we had just come from Edward's house. He didn't lie when he said he knew how to dance. Once again, we had so much fun dancing in his living room, while Mrs. Cullen and Jared cheered us on. It was weird at first, and Peanut had to show me a few moves, but it was a blast. After, I helped his mom make dinner, and then we all sat down.

It was much like dinner with Charlie, Emmett, and Paul, only Dr. and Mrs. Cullen were so interested in all our days. They never commented or spoke to each other like we weren't at the table; they just listened, and I thought that was amazing. His family is great.

"Where'd you go?" Edward asked.

"Huh?" I was still breathing heavily, but now I noticed Edward wasn't on top of me. "Um…" I sat up and pulled my polo shirt down. "Just thinking."

He poked my nose. "What about?"

I shrugged. "You're going away soon."

He rolled his eyes. "I haven't even heard from U-Dub yet."

"Alice got her acceptance letter yesterday. Yours should come soon—maybe tomorrow. I bet they do it alphabetically."

"If Alice_ Brandon_ got hers yesterday, I should have too." He frowned. "I probably won't get in…Do you guys need an extra hand at the garage? I can be trained."

"You'll get in," I promised him. "I can feel it." Leaning my head on his shoulder, I grasped his hand. "Don't sell yourself short."

"Thank you for believing in me." He kissed my hair.

"I'll miss you when you go."

"If I get in, I'll come home every weekend and call you every day," he said.

I picked my head up. "Really?" I smiled.

He pecked my lips. "Of course. You're not getting rid of me that easy."

I giggled, so happy in this moment. "You're amazing. I just—I didn't think we'd get so close, you know?"

"Me neither. But y'know, I feel like—like we've always been together, like I can't and don't want to remember what it was like without you in my life." He smacked his forehead. "That probably came out wrong."

I pulled his hand away. "I know what you mean…I feel the same."

He slowly came over to claim my lips. His kiss started slow, and then quickly morphed into something vigorous and passionate. I felt so much within it, like I always do—and my heart threatened to explode, not break.

**...o.0...**

Edward was already drunk by the time I got to Ben Cheney's house. Jasper had accosted him after the game, and they drank themselves silly. Sadly, I had to work—Emmett wouldn't let me get out of it because no one else could be there. Paul and Jimmy had joined the team this season, needing to make up gymnastic credits for graduation. I didn't get to see my boyfriend pitch a no-hitter in the last inning.

News spread of Ben's open house, and everyone was going. I rode with Emmett and Rosalie, and I hoped I looked okay. Once again, I wore a pair of chinos and a peasant blouse with some flats. My hair was a mess after work, and so I placed it in a ponytail.

"Gorgeous." As soon as I walked into Ben's house, Edward pulled me into him. "Emmett!" He gave my brother a high-five.

Emmett slapped his hand to Edward's but gave me a look.

"He's fine," I whispered to my brother.

Emmett looked back to Edward. "Maybe you should slow down." He stole Edward's beer, and walked past us with Rose under his arm. She gave Edward and I this smug look, and I caught her checking out my boyfriend as well. Rosalie looked amazing tonight, wearing a fitted red dress, but thankfully Edward didn't stare back. He only had eyes for me, and that—well, that made me not care about his drunkenness.

"I'm fine," Edward laughed. "I'm not so drunk. Trust me; I know."

I wrapped my arms around his neck. "I do, too." I pulled him down to me.

He gave me a loud kiss. It was chaste, but filled with something. "You smell amazing." He ran his nose down my neck. "Want a drink?"

"A beer," I said. "Gotta make sure you don't sleep on the lawn this time."

"Oh. . . you remember that, huh?" He winked.

"I do. . . you with your bar crawls." I rolled my eyes. That morning, I had let him lie to me. I'm not sure why he did; however, Jake had mentioned being at Ben's house with Edward.

They were never in Seattle.

"You'll put me to bed?" He grasped my hips and held me against him, and then his hands went lower to knead my ass.

I sighed, wishing that was a possibility. "I'll make sure you get inside…"

He chuckled. "Come on."

With my hand in his, he escorted me over to the kitchen and grabbed me a beer from the refrigerator. After he popped the cap off, he reached for a glass.

I stopped him. "It's fine."

He gave me the bottle and gasped. "I love this song—let's go dance."

Edward started to pull me into the parlor, while Little Richard blared from the side player. "Um…not tonight." I tried to pull his hand back, but he couldn't hear me.

Before I knew it, he had taken my hand and pushed me into a large spin. I found myself giggling and going along with it.

_Well it's Saturday night and I just got paid_

_I'm a fool about my money, don't try to save._

_My heart says, "Go go, have a time."_

_'Cause it's Saturday night and I'm feeling fine._

After he tossed me around a bit, my feet tried to match his. He was going way too fast, and I failed at following, but then he picked me up to throw me behind his back. He caught me, and I kept squealing in excitement. I love to dance with Edward, feeling so secure and having a blast. Others must have thought we were doing great. They cheered us, and I hated that everyone was staring. Yet, I was with Edward and for some reason that made it okay.

_I'm gonna rock it up, I'm gonna rip it up_

_I'm gonna shake it out, I'm gonna ball it up_

_I'm gonna rock it out, and ball tonight._

Edward pulled me into a sweetheart. My back was to him, as his arms were wrapped around me, and our feet continued to move. Then my breath hitched when he quickly bit down on my neck, only to twirl me away from him.

_I got me a date and I won't be late_

_Picked her up in my 88_

_Shag on down by the union hall,_

_When the joint starts jumpin' I'll have a ball,_

When I came back from the multiple spins, I felt almost lightheaded. But then Edward had slowed us down. Regardless of the fast beats that played, he held me in an embrace.

_I'm gonna rock it up, I'm gonna rip it up_

_I'm gonna shake it out, I'm gonna ball it up_

_I'm gonna rock it out, and ball tonight._

Our hearts were thumping rapidly against each other. His hair had fallen down into his eyes, and my hands ran up his white t-shirt. His buttoned down flannel was wide open, and I felt him shiver and his muscles coil under my touch. "You're a great dancer."

"I have an amazing partner." His head dipped low to catch my lips. He kissed me so deep and so right, and we were still in front of everyone.

After that embarrassing, and yet amazing, public display of affection, we decided to take a walk. We wound up in Ben's backyard. There was a tire swing, and Edward thought it genius to push me around on it.

"You ready?" he asked, holding the swing and me so high in the air.

I cringed while I hugged the chain tightly. "Ready!"

He let go, and I felt like I was flying as a squeal escaped me. But then the swing and I were jostled when Edward hopped on with me. "Hello!" Edward pecked my cheek.

Smiling so wide, I picked my head up to look at him. His eyes were a deep shade of green and they twinkled with his inebriation, but that was okay. Edward was still so handsome, it almost hurt to stare.

"Bella, I—" He palmed my cheek.

My brow furrowed. "What is it?" I placed my hand on his as we moved slowly in the tire swing now.

"You make me so happy," he whispered.

"Me, too…you make me happy, too." I hugged him tight.

"I have something for you." He leaned away and reached into his pocket. "I know you said you didn't want it, but. . . Bella, I want you to have it." He showed me his class ring.

I was speechless as I stared down at his hand.

"It's too big, I know. I'll get you a chain. It's just—when I'm away at school, I want you to have…something of mine with you, um. . ."

"You," I swallowed, "you got accepted?" Tears welled up in my eyes, and I hated myself for it. I should be happy, but I was still sad.

He nodded, wearing a crooked grin. "I got the letter today. My dad. . . he poured Jasper and me a few shots—that's why I couldn't come get you. He took away my keys. Oh, Bella. He was so proud of me." He looked down. "I never—I never saw him so happy."

I wiped away a few tears from my cheeks, and then I wiped away the one that fell from his eye. "You're so smart, Edward. And I'm sure it won't be the last time you knock it out of the park." I was still at a loss for words, but Edward knew what I meant—even if he's a pitcher.

"Why are you crying?"

"Why are you crying?" I asked.

We both laughed, wiping each other's eyes.

"You're my Romeo," I whispered.

"You're my everything."

We kissed. And, of course, we got too carried away and almost fell from the swing. Then we actually did fall. Edward landed with a soft thump, while he laughed so loud. And then he gently pulled me to lay on top of him.

"I'm going to miss you so much."

"Hey." He held my face. "We still have time. Then, like I said. I'll call and visit." He kissed me softly, and then we turned. He hovered over me, not caring who saw. When his lips descended lower, I felt like I was on fire.

My emotions seemed to be changing so quickly, and I didn't know which end was up—until Edward bit down on my neck again and sucked. It felt amazing and borderline painful, but I didn't want him to stop. "Hmmm." I moaned.

"You're my girl, right?" The look in his eyes was so intense as he leaned away to place his ring on my thumb.

"Yours," I promised.

He groaned and dipped his head lower.

When his hands went under my shirt as I stared up at the moon, I stopped him. "Stop. . . We're outside," I giggled.

"I'm sorry." He rolled over onto his back.

I turned onto my stomach and stared at him. "You're beautiful."

He laughed. "You're gorgeous." He pulled me to lay at his side. "Did you want me to walk you home?" He sat up, taking me with him. "Why were you so late anyway? This sucks. It's almost eleven."

I shrugged. "I'm with Emmett. I can stay out for as long—"

"Bells, we're going."

I squeaked with surprise and looked up to my brother. "Were your ears ringing?"

"I can walk her," Edward said.

Emmett grabbed my bicep and pulled me to stand. "Oww—" I pushed him away.

My brother pushed my ponytail away from my neck. "What's this?" He looked down to Edward. "And don't think I didn't see that lip-lock either."

I cupped my neck. "We were just—"

"Oh, I know what you were doing," Emmett stared at Edward.

My boyfriend stood up, and then his eyes zeroed in on his handiwork. "Bella, I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I liked it." I told Edward but stared at my brother. "I'm your girl—Edward Cullen's girl—you can mark me."

"Cute . . . Now go inside." Emmett gave me a push.

"What the fuck?" Edward pulled me to him. "Don't you fucking dare put your hands on her, push her, or anything like that."

"What?" Emmett thought that was hilarious.

"Did I fucking stutter?" Edward pushed Emmett. "Don't touch her."

"Cool it, guys!" I stepped between them.

"Go inside, Bells," Emmett said, but stared at Edward.

Edward glared right back at him. "Go inside, love." He nudged me to the side, standing in front of me.

"Love?" Emmett's fist flew.

Edward's fist flew, and then they were rolling around on the grass.

"Stop!" I tried to pull them apart, but I couldn't. My screaming had caught the attention of Jake and Paul. They came over to break it up, and I fussed over Edward. "Are you okay?"

Edward spit some blood onto the ground. "Fine." He looked away from me.

"Let me see." I held his cheeks, seeing his cut lip, and then his eye, which was already swelling. "You asshole!" I shouted, looking back to Emmett.

My brother was laughing, but I was proud of Edward. Emmett's nose was bleeding and his shirt was ripped. "Say goodnight, Bella."

"No." I hugged onto Edward.

"Go on…I'm going to head home anyway." Edward kissed my hair. "It's not much of a party without you."

I swooned.

"We'll drive you," Emmett said, putting out his hand.

They shared some weird stare-off, but then shook hands. From that moment, I swore I'd never understand boys. We also never gave Edward a ride home. I walked with him back to his house, to make sure he actually got inside, and then Emmett pulled up in front.

"You sure you're okay?"

Edward grinned, leaning his forehead to mine. "That depends." He softly kissed my lips.

"Depends?" I smiled.

"If your father sees that." He ran his thumb along my neck.

"I'll wear a scarf this week," I giggled. "You'll just have to leave hickeys where Emmett and Charlie can't see, like you usually do."

He groaned, planting his lips against mine and pushing me against his front door. That was when Emmett honked the horn, and I almost fell back into Edward's house. His dad had opened the door.

"Sorry to interrupt," Dr. Cullen laughed.

"I'm. . ." I was mildly embarrassed. "Goodnight, Edward—Dr. Cullen." I hurriedly ran out to Emmett's car.

Rosalie stared daggers as I entered the backseat.

"What?" I asked her.

"Nothing."

I sighed and sat back.

Emmett drove off. "You guys are getting pretty close." He looked at me through the rearview mirror.

"I guess so," I whispered, twirling his ring on my thumb.

"Are you sure that's wise? He's leaving soon." He frowned. "I don't want to see you get hurt."

"We'll still be together," I said. "He's going to U-Dub. Seattle isn't that far. There's weekends and the phone. Plus, he's going for his teaching certificate. He'll be back in two years."

Rosalie laughed.

"What's so funny?" I snapped, hating her a little more if that was possible.

"Nothing. . . it's just, well, college changes people. What if he meets someone? I bet he'll come home a few times. Then he'll start forgetting to call."

"You don't know him."

"Do you?" Emmett asked. "Honestly, Bells. Do you _really_ know him?"

"I know enough," I stated. "Edward is truthful and he cares about me. He gave me his class ring."

"He _what_?" Rosalie turned around to grab my hand, but then her shoulders dropped. "That doesn't mean anything. I'm sorry." She looked to Emmett and back to me. "He probably did that so you'll screw him before he leaves."

"No!"

"Probably." Emmett shrugged. "And don't you dare."

I tore my hand out of Rosalie's.

"You said you'd date him, maybe go to the movies a few times…" Emmett trailed off as we stopped at a red light. "I didn't think you two would get so serious so fast."

"Neither did I," I admitted, and then Rosalie and Emmett told me a little bit about their relationship. They were so open and honest it was hard not to believe them. Apparently, they never became serious because Rosalie plans to go across the country for school. When I brought up her parents, Emmett was fast to say that he had met them already. And that kind of put my previous thoughts to bed. The truth was long-distance relationships are hard, and Emmett doesn't want to hold Rosalie back. There's a whole world outside of Forks.

And why should Rose be held back by a boyfriend who never plans to leave Forks or the garage he's settled at?

It made sense, and my stomach sank to my knees.

"I love Rosie enough to let her go." He kissed Rosalie's hand. "We have problems, we date others sometimes, but when you love someone…it always comes back to them." I detected sadness in his voice. "I'm going to miss you like crazy." He looked to Rose as we came to a stop in front of her house.

"Oh, me too, Emmy." They started making out, and I looked out the window. When they finally pulled apart, Rosalie looked back to me. "We just don't want to see you get hurt."

Even if I hated her, I needed to talk to someone—anyone. "What would you do?"

She looked back to my brother. "We've had this agreement for a while." She looked back to me. "But…I'd break up before it goes any further—to spare yourselves the heartache. Like, a clean break, before you guys fall in love or something."

The problem with that is I'm already in love.

**Thank you for reading. **

**Please leave me your thoughts.**

**Song: "Rip it" up by Little Richard**


	13. Slippin and a Slidin

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

"**Made in the Shades" **

**Chapter Thirteen: Slippin' and a Slidin'**

_Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand_.**** - Mark Twain****

Tonight, Bella and I were supposed to study. We did manage to get some work done. And right when I suggested we go for a drive, Peanut came in with Tanya. They asked if we wanted to play Monopoly, and Bella accepted.

It was fine, but I couldn't figure out why Bella was being so distant. For the past few days, she's avoided being alone with me. It was just weird and so unlike her.

The game went on forever, and we eventually left it open in the living room—we promised to get together over the weekend and finish.

She let me drive her home. But as soon as my lips touched hers, she yawned and said she was tired. It was fine. She doesn't have to kiss me—no one makes her—yet we hadn't had much time to just talk either. When Bella said she'd get a ride to school with Emmett the next morning, I knew something was wrong.

Sadly, I was too afraid to ask.

The next day at school, I couldn't concentrate. During lunch, I'd had enough and cornered her in the hallway.

"What's going on?" I held her close—scared she might run away.

She stared up at me with wide, watery eyes. "I—I—think—um," she stammered.

I palmed her cheeks. "Think what?" I whispered.

Bella broke down into sobs before me, and I hugged her tight. "You're scaring me," I admitted.

She shook her head and pulled away, sniffling and wiping her eyes. "I've—I'm sorry." She looked back to me, but was quick to turn away. "I've just been missing my mom a lot."

"Oh . . ." I rubbed her back.

"I'm fine. I'm just silly," she giggled through her tears.

"Ha-have you ever asked your father, um, where she might be?" I kissed her hair. "If he won't tell you, we can find her. . . somehow."

She shook her head no. "We never moved. If she wanted us, she could come back. I don't—I don't want someone who doesn't want me."

I nodded. "I hate seeing you sad." My stomach ached.

She jumped into my arms, and I hugged her as tight as I could. She likes that—says it makes her feel safe. "I'm sorry," she whispered against my neck.

I pulled back. "Why are you sorry?" I asked.

"I just have so much going on in here." She pointed to her temple wearing a smile. "I'm crazy sometimes."

I grinned. "No…don't talk about my girlfriend like that."

"I can't go to the game later." She frowned. "Emmett needs me. Jake's off tonight too…it sucks."

I nodded in understanding, although I was a little disappointed. My father was finally making it out to one of my games, and I wanted my girl to be there too—the perfect package: my family. "Can we meet up after? We can get an ice cream soda…I'll meet you at closing?"

She grinned. "Sounds perfect."

"Lunch?"

She slid away from me and hugged herself. "I'm not very hungry. Can we hang out in your car?"

I'm not sure what happened, what changed between yesterday, this morning, and now. But Bella showed me a lot of affection in my car—I mean, a lot.

"Bella…" I panted, turning my head away. The rain was coming down in buckets. My windows were fogged, and Bella had taken her shirt off.

"What?" She rocked against me, and she needed to stop.

"Just—" I held her hips and stared up at her. "What, um—" Usually she stops us before we get this far. The shirt and brassiere always go up to expose her, but they never come off.

And everything she was doing seemed forced, like she didn't want to do it.

"You don't want me?" She picked herself up to drop down and twirl her hips on me.

The feeling of her and the vision before me . . .

"Christ. . . I do, baby." I sat up to place my lips to hers, and it was like the passion reignited, for her too. She clawed at my shoulders, kissed me deeply, and I loved running my hands along her bare back, and then to her front. "Beautiful." I stopped to pull back and stare, swearing I had never seen anything as good. Nothing compared to the vision below me. I've never seen anything this amazing in any of my hot books either.

When our roles were reversed and my pants hung low on my hips, she touched my bare cock. "Oh God . . ." My eyes rolled back.

She pushed against my chest. "I'm sorry." She held her mouth and made sure to cover her breasts with her arms. The tears in her eyes didn't go unnoticed either. She wasn't crying, but she might start to; I could tell.

I nodded, swallowing loudly and handing her the discarded blouse. "Can you tell me what's wrong, what's really going on?" I was nervous again as I fixed my slacks.

"Just making up for lost time—honest." She hugged me.

We sat quietly in my car for a while. Once one of us decided to look at the time, we realized we had missed half of seventh period. Instead of running inside and making up some excuse, Bella just wanted me to take her to the garage. It was a Friday, and she had no reason to go back into the school.

By the time we reached the garage, everything seemed normal again—like it did days ago. "If this rain doesn't let up, there might not be a game," I sighed, rubbing my thumb along her cheek.

"Hmmm," she hummed. "Your parents are still going away next weekend, right?"

"As far as I know." I kissed her hair.

Unfortunately, the game was canceled, but Dad was still off early. He suggested we go out to Port Angeles for dinner, since we never really got to celebrate my acceptance to U-Dub. Still, I wore a frown and was being a baby because I wanted Bella to come with us.

Dad knew, and Mom suggested we stop by the garage. Dad needed to get gas anyway.

Dressed in a poncho that was many sizes too big, Bella was out at the pumps. "Hey, pretty lady," I called from the backseat.

She beamed at me. "Hey!" Then she looked to the front and waved to my parents.

"Is there any way you can…" Dad paused. "What's that saying, blow this popsickle stand?"

Bella laughed. "We are slow…" she looked back to the garage, "and Paul's here."

"Emmett!" I shouted, seeing him crouched by a vehicle. "Can I steal my girlfriend for dinner in Port A?"

He grinned and looked to Bella. She was looking back, and then Emmett nodded. "Neat-o!" Bella squealed. "Just…give me a minute to change." She turned and then came back to the car again. "Sorry." She finished pumping the gas, my father paid her, and then we waited while she changed.

I met her in the office with an umbrella. "Beautiful as always." She wore what she had to school, a beige pencil skirt and a white blouse, but had her hair up.

She hopped up to give me a lingering kiss that nearly knocked me off my feet.

"Thanks for the rescue…I'm just miserable today. I need you."

I smiled and hugged her tight. "Same here." It was true. I couldn't for the life of me figure out why I needed her desperately today, why I need her every day.

Sometimes, I feel as though I can't remember what my life was like without her. It seemed empty, and I didn't smile nearly as often. Daily, she fills me with that same excitement that makes me want to continually squeal. She's my best friend. She doesn't think I'm silly and she listens when I speak. Her touch drives me crazy, as do her hugs and kisses, and I was madly in love with her.

I find myself feeling a little more mature. It's weird, but it's like she fills some void that was there, one I used to try and fill with masturbation...a false sense of satisfaction; meanwhile, I don't get the release quite as often. Needless to say, I'm still confused as all fuck, and I couldn't be happier.

And it's only been a little over a month, but I wouldn't trade the time with her for anything in the world.

And that night I got my girlfriend back. I'm not sure what was bothering her those few days, but I was so glad that my love came back to me.

**. . .o.0. . .**

"Come on, Esme. Let's go!" My father shouted from the foyer.

My mother smiled and reached to wipe cookie crumbs from Jared's face. "Edward, you have the number to the hotel."

I nodded, going ants in the pants because I wanted them gone already.

She looked down as she placed gloves on her hands. "Mind your brother, and you can have one friend stay overnight." She smiled at Jasper. "I hope you stay…you're such a good influence on my boys." Her sheathed hand touched his cheek.

"What?" Jared made a face and looked to Jasper. "Him?" He pointed.

"Well, Mrs. C, I do try." Jasper nodded with a hint of a blush kissing his cheeks . . . because of my mother? That made me snicker inside, while I wore a grin.

"You're the best." I hit Jasper's arm, maybe a little too hard since he winced. But I truly didn't want to know what his real thoughts were of my mother.

"Es! Come on!" Dad shouted from the foyer. He was probably going crazy, too. My father barely said goodbye. He's been trying to rush my mother out of the house for the past hour.

"I'm coming!" My mother snapped and stomped her foot.

"Soon, you will be!" Dad cackled.

"Carlisle! That is not becoming!" She stormed out of the kitchen.

Upon further inspection—the three of us peeking out the window—we saw my father peel out of the driveway, leaving some rubber behind.

My father was expected to speak at a conference in Seattle tomorrow. And so, they drove out this morning, and are due back Sunday evening, but maybe Monday morning.

As per my mother, Jared and I aren't allowed to leave the house, and Jasper is allowed to sleep over. I was in charge of the house now, a grown-up who could be trusted—a thoughtful, conscientious son my mother and father could count on to watch over things.

"Party at Cullen's house…yeah, bring chicks." Jasper hung up the phone.

For some reason, people actually showed up. There were so many more people here, than there were at Ben's house two weeks back. The squares, the jocks, Emmett's posse, the pretty girls, the uglies—you name it; they were here.

But most of all, my Bella was here.

Tonight she wasn't wearing slacks and that intrigued me. What did that mean?

Since our first date, I have become very familiar with her breasts.

And she's palmed the monster a few times.

And I've come in my pants twice.

She doesn't know about that, though. I just sit, feeling sticky until I get home or encounter a bathroom.

Emmett and I have come to blows once, but that was only because I got too carried away and left a hickey on Bella. My mouth marred her beautiful neck, and yet Bella didn't give a fuck. She liked it—told me the next day she wanted me to make a necklace.

She likes being my girl, like I'm some prize instead of the luckiest guy ever. She tells everyone she's Edward Cullen's girl.

And I love that.

I don't so much respect Emmett as much as I fear him, so I leave hickeys where he can't see.

It works out.

"Drink this." I handed Bella one of Jasper's concoctions.

She barely sipped it and her face scrunched up. "I think I should stick to beer."

"Okay." I left my arm around her and chugged from the cup, while my hand lay gently on her breast. The drink tasted fine to me.

"Go, Ben, go!" Peter cheered Ben on as he danced on the dining room table.

Then I whistled when Ben tore open his shirt and buttons flew.

"This party is so wild," some square chick said next to me.

I smiled, and then watched as Ben jumped from the table. He reached out in front of him and pulled the curtains down. The drapes fell and so did the rod from the window.

Just as I was about to go over there, Peter and Jasper helped him up. Then they proceeded to put the curtains back.

"This is crazy," I whispered.

"Your mother is definitely going to shit her pants about this." Bella shook her head.

I nodded. "Probably…Wanna go to my room?"

"Not tonight," she said. "We do have to talk, but I'd rather we not while you're drunk."

"Come on." I frowned. "We never go up there."

My father doesn't care, but my mother makes us stay in the parlor where she can see us. Weeks ago, Mom caught us necking in the backseat of my car. Granted, we were in our driveway. Either way, my mother got an eyeful. I think she saw a tit, possibly a tit in my mouth, but yeah, an eyeful.

It was the best day ever.

Then she asked to speak with Bella privately. I have no idea what they spoke about, but we didn't get in trouble.

"You have to be home soon, and it's so crowded."

"That's what happens when you throw a party." She chuckled. "I still can't believe this. They trusted you, and Peanut is drunk!" She pointed to where my little brother was chugging a beer.

"Are you mad?" I winced.

"I hate to sound like your dad…but I'm a little disappointed in you." She shook her head no.

"Oh. . ." I placed my arms around her. "It's just a party." I softly kissed her cheek.

"I know, but. . ."

"We're only young once," I laughed.

She frowned and stared across the room. "Most of all, I hate that girls keep looking at you. And they think they can just touch you."

"It doesn't matter. I'm with you." I placed kisses in her neck.

When Lauren Mallory and Jessica Stanley arrived, they were already drunk, and so they felt the need to attack me with a hug as soon as they walked through the door. I had hopped out of it, but Bella was upset about it. . . like I can control what others do. It's not like I embraced them back. Ever since Bella and I got together, I've gained a lot of attention from the opposite sex. They hit on me now, all the time. I get where Bella is coming from, though. If some guy placed a finger on her, I'd go crazy.

"It _shouldn't_ matter anymore."

"What?" I asked.

She shook her head. "Nothing."

"Don't be like that. Talk to me."

"Not tonight." She sipped her beer.

My face fell. "Please? If something's bothering you. . . Bella, please, let's go upstairs."

"Okay," she whispered.

Right before we reached the stairs, Jared stopped me. "Where are you going?" He stumbled over to us.

"Um…" I handed him Bella's beer, and then placed him in front of Lauren. "Here, fall in love."

"Peanut, if there's a problem, get Emmett," Bella told him.

Then we made the mad dash to my bedroom. Once we were inside my hands were all over her—her ass, her tits, her hips, her face—not in that order. I love kissing her, and I was glad we were alone. "Gorgeous."

She's fairly used to my erection. She just doesn't acknowledge it all the time. The first time she touched it, I think it was an accident. "Edward…stop, you're drunk." She pushed against my chest.

"I still want you when I'm sober." I rubbed my clothed dick onto her.

"Edward…let's talk." She pushed me into a sitting position.

"Okay." I pulled her to me.

"I was talking to Rosalie…"

I groaned. "Why?" My drunk mind was angry. "Don't talk to Rosalie about us, okay? She hates me, so…don't." I held her chin. "You don't even like her, so why are you taking advice from her?" In my heart, I knew nothing good could come from a talk Bella had with Rosalie.

"Regardless." She jerked her head away from me. "She made a lot of sense," she whispered. "I'll still go to prom with you, but—"

"Shut up," I blurted, my stomach dropping to my knees. "I don't want to hear what else you have to say." I shook my head.

"Emmett agreed…" She pushed her hair behind her ears. "We shouldn't go too far—you're going to college—graduating in a month. We'll be together for what, three more months and then you're leaving?" She sniffled. "I thought you'd hold my books, be someone who could take me to the movies, and kiss…I didn't think I'd feel this much. I mean, I knew we couldn't be together forever. . . you're going away," she cried.

I reached to turn on the lamp and being greeted with her tears sobered me up.

"Bella…" I started.

"No, don't argue. I'm right."

"No, you're wrong," I laughed. "By a stroke of luck I got into U-Dub. I'll come home every weekend. We'll still see each other. Then you can come out when you graduate."

"Emmett said you'd say that, just so I'll go all the way with you."

I pulled my hair. "No!"

"You don't want to sleep with me?"

"You know I do, but I'd never con or force you…we're not even ready for that." I stood up, getting even more upset. "Don't you know me? Don't you know how crazy I am about you? We _can_ have forever . . . you just have to want it."

She put her hands out. "Why are you shouting at me?"

"Because you're being unreasonable," I whispered.

"I don't think I am…I'm not going to college." She stood up. "I'll be here." She turned away from me.

"Who says?" I asked.

She stared down to the floor. "Just…I want us to be friends—just friends. We can still go to prom."

"You're serious?" I wanted to cry so fucking bad—hug my mother—or hug Bella and never let her leave. "Bella…" I grabbed her hand.

She pulled away, being so cold.

"I'll never touch you again. You have my word. If it's the physical stuff—" I gulped, holding my palms up. "Bella, you're my best friend." And I wasn't embarrassed about the tears that spilled from my eyes now. "You can't do this."

She looked to me. "Don't cry." Her lip quivered.

"Take it back, please. . . Bella, take it back." I wiped my eyes.

"We're still friends. We can hang out without the physical stuff."

I nodded. "I don't want you dating anyone else, though." I pulled her to me and hugged her tight.

She pushed me away, but I wouldn't let go. "How can you—"

"Look," I stole a kiss, "if you're not into me just say so." I kissed her again. "You can't say you don't want to be my girl and then go be someone else's." I kissed her deep.

Bella pulled away. "Stop yelling and stop—"

I crashed my lips forcefully to hers and stuck my tongue down her throat. She had to feel what I feel, because she wasn't listening to my words.

"Stop! I'm sorry—I know you're drunk."

"I'm not."

"You are!"

"Shut up!" I squeezed her and kissed her, and I hoped she'd forget what she said before. "I'm not drunk." I held her to me as I plopped back on the bed, and then I rolled to hover over her. "I just don't understand why you're doing this. Bella, I lo—"

She clamped her hand over my mouth. "Don't say that," she cried. "Everything _you_ do freaks me out. We went too fast—everything went _so_ fast. I never knew I could feel so much."

"Same here, baby. It's the same here. You don't know how much I—" I growled and kissed her deep, and I couldn't control my hands again.

"Get off me."

"No…not until you understand."

"Edwa—" I cut her off with my lips, and then I kissed down her neck. "Please stop," she cried. "You're scaring me."

"What?" I pulled back to hold her face. "I'd never hurt you. I just—I love—"

"Stop it!" She pushed me so hard.

I rolled onto my back, but grabbed her hand. "How about—we just—we don't break up, okay? We'll hang out and…start over?"

"I can't…I don't want to hold you back—"

"Is that what this is about?" I shot up and started pacing. "Bella…you have no idea what you're talking about, especially since I'll probably flunk out first semester and end up peeling bananas at Carvel."

"Never. You're so smart."

I laughed. "And you're the only person who thinks so . . . " I bent down to hold her thighs. "I need you, like air to breathe. You're my everything. Please don't do this. I-I need you."

She palmed my face. "You don't."

"Please!" I begged, burying my face in her lap. I wasn't being perverted; I was desperate and needed to be as close as possible. "Please." I wiped my eyes. "Bella, I love you. I'll call you every day. I'll come home every weekend. We can have forever. Please. Please. Please!" I stiffened, wincing, and squeezing her so tight. "And if you don't want me to go, I won't. Bella…please-"

"Edward, stop."

I chuckled bitterly. "That should be my new middle name—Stop. Edward_ Stop_ Cullen."

"You never know when to stop—"

"You drive me crazy."

"And this is why we're no good!" She screamed.

No matter what I said that night, she wouldn't budge. Bella insisted on being my friend again, because being with-with me scared her. She also thought she'd hold me back from doing so many wonderful things—when all I ever wanted to do was be with her.

She let me walk her home, where she gave me back my ring, and a kiss on my cheek. I told her to keep it, I wanted her to keep it, but she refused. I took my time walking back home, and with each step I took, I grew angrier and angrier.

Once I was back, I tried to kick everyone out of my fucking house.

Quite a few jocks and Emmett's whole posse refused to leave.

"Relax…we'll leave whenever," Jimmy said.

"Yeah, Edward…lighten up," Paul said.

The jocks never said anything. They just looked to Emmett for guidance.

"I want you all out." I folded my arms across my chest.

"Ed," Jake put his arm around me, "this is the party of the season—it's wild!" he shouted over the music. "You're going to be a legend!"

I shrugged him off me, and turned to Emmett. He was too busy kissing down Rosalie's neck, while she smirked deviously at me—that shit pushed me over the edge. I had enough.

"Are you proud of yourself?" I snapped at her.

What I said didn't faze her and she turned to kiss Emmett passionately, once she had my attention.

"Fuck this!"

Without missing a beat, I marched right out to the shed and grabbed my father's shotgun.

Once it was loaded, I shouted, "Get the fuck out!", pointing the gun wherever.

"You're crazy!" Rosalie shouted at me.

"Whoa!" Paul shielded Alice from me, like I'd hurt her.

"Get the fuck out of my house now!" I fired at the wall and then dropped it. "Fuck!"

"Edward!" Jasper held his head, and those who were left over ran out with the quickness—even Emmett.

"Oh my God!" I stared at the hole in the wall.

"Mom's going to kill you," Peanut hiccupped. "I'm in the gang now. Emmy says…" He fell over onto the couch. "And I—I felt a boob—" He retched and vomited on the carpet.

"Shit." I was still holding my head.

"He'll sleep it off." Jasper patted my back.

"My parents are going to murder me."

Jasper handed me a bottle. "You might as well." He shrugged.

"Bella broke up with me." I grabbed the bottle to chug it.

"Alice and Paul were making out. . . my prom date was making out with Paul." Jasper stole it back.

I woke up in a pool of my own barf, so I won.

**Thank you for reading. **

**Please leave me your thoughts.**

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	14. Hell

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**Sorry about the wait. There are only a handful of chaps left, and I'll be updating weekly. **

***HEAVY warning. While most of you will laugh at Edward, you might just cry for him too. I don't know. I laughed, but my sense of humor is whacked. **

"**Made in the Shades" **

**Chapter Fourteen: Hell**

_Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured._

**- Mark Twain**

Worse for wear, Jasper, Peanut, and I got to cleaning. Hell, even Ben and Peter came by and helped clean the yard. Jake refused to clean, but he brought by a pizza pie.

And I didn't see Bella at all for the remainder of the weekend. When I called her house, Emmett said she wasn't available.

The place looked immaculate, even the carpet, but my parents still knew. Instead of a potpourri-laden house, they came home to the stale stench of alcohol and cigarettes. With the amount of people that were here, even when we left the windows open it never aired out.

Also, Peanut took the blame for the hole in the wall. We rigged it so it just looked like a hole. And he said he was horsing around with Dad's golf clubs when it happened.

They bought it, but they didn't believe me when I said we didn't throw a party.

Either way, I knew someone would tell about the shotgun—have the Chief come here or something, but he never did.

"You are trash, and your friends are trash," my father said. "No one is to visit anymore…not Jasper, hell, not even Bella. That's it!" he yelled.

"You are not my son. . . I don't know who you are anymore." My mother sucked her teeth.

My eyes narrowed and I stood up to tower over her. "Oh, yeah? Well, whose son am I?"

She scoffed. "Mr. Smart Aleck."

"He wants to be Mr. Popularity. Tell me, son. Did any of your 'friends'—" he used air quotes, "stick around to help you clean?"

"A few." I rolled my eyes. "Look, I'm sorry."

"Sorry isn't good enough this time—" My father started.

"The place is fine…a few days with the windows cracked, and it won't smell anymore." I shrugged. "Peanut did it, but I'll fix the wall." While gesturing to it, I felt really bad that he took the rap.

"Sorry, Pop," Peanut said.

"I'm sorry, too." I nodded.

"And that makes it okay?" Dad raised a brow. "We trusted you—"

Shaking my head, I let out an elongated sigh. "I don't know what else to say."

"I can't believe you!" Dad continued to yell. "You really had me fooled. I thought you changed, that maybe you were becoming a man. We didn't raise you to be some fink, chump, know-it-all. . . this isn't like you." He kept going and pacing. "We give you a little responsibility-"

"Everyone throws parties-"

"I wasn't finished!" He was in my face now. "Your stupidity doesn't surprise me-"

"Carlisle!" Mom shouted. "That's enough!"

Dad ignored her. "What's surprising is your lack of respect. . . my son, the idiot, at least maintained a certain level of-"

"Bye." I grabbed my jacket and left, while I refused to cry. After doing the crime, I knew I had to do the time, but I didn't want to hear any more of his words. They hurt.

"Edward Anthony!" My father hollered. "Get back here!" He ran out of the house after me.

Faster than I thought possible, I drove away.

When I went to pick up Bella—I needed her so bad—she told me to leave the garage. She couldn't believe I pulled a gun on her brother.

And she wouldn't let me explain what really happened.

I also looked to Emmett with my eyes pleading, willing him to say I hadn't, but he didn't.

My heart broke for the millionth time that weekend, so I called Jake. He let me crash on his couch for the night. I paid him a dollar, and he let me watch his sister take a bath.

It didn't do anything for me.

And I could have bought gas with that money.

When I knew she'd be walking home, I crept up on her—driving slow and begging Bella to get in the car.

Her stubborn ass wanted to walk home.

"Fine!" Was my response and I sped away, only to go around the corner. "Please?" I begged some more.

"You're being weird."

"Yeah, well, whatever. You knew I was weird when you accepted my date offer." I smirked at her, not able to help it, but not able to smile wide. She looked gorgeous, wearing black chinos and a flannel shirt. Her hair was down and wasn't done. It lay loose and straight, and she had purple shadows under her puffy eyes.

She grinned back. "Go home, Edward. Your dad was looking for you earlier."

I rolled my eyes. "Get in the car. We need to talk."

When she crossed the street, I got out to speak with her. "I never pulled a rifle on your brother. It was an idle threat—I wanted everybody out."

"Edward…" She tried to go around me and looked scared.

"You think I'm going to hurt you?" That broke my heart even more.

"Just go." She wouldn't look at me.

"Bells?" Emmett asked.

My eyes narrowed, and my body whipped to him. My anger was bubbling up inside of me, and I just couldn't take it anymore. "What the fuck did you say to her?" I pointed to Bella and ran up to Emmett. I pushed against his chest. "You told her I'd break her heart? Really?"

"Get the fuck off my porch!" He pointed.

"You don't know me!" I shouted. "How dare you compare what me and your sister have to what you and Rosalie have!"

"You've proven to be a cool guy, Edward. I don't want to—"

I knocked him right on his jaw. It nearly broke my hand, but at least his head snapped away and he stumbled back.

"That was cute." Emmett nodded and punched me so hard, I flew from his porch—over the railing and into the bush.

"Emmett, stop!" Bella shouted. "Edward?" She fussed over me. "Oh my gosh…are you okay?" she sobbed.

"Get off me…you don't get to care. You don't get to cry." Shaking my head, and on the verge of tears myself, I stood up to square my shoulders. "I'm fine," I lied.

Honestly, I was really embarrassed. I let my temper get away from me, and I was hit in front of my girl again—only she's not my girl anymore. "See you around." I got into my car and drove off.

**...o.0...**

Bella lied.

She never went back to being my friend. She didn't even go back to waving at me in the halls. Bella ignored me, and it pissed me the fuck off.

I left flowers—at her house, the garage, her locker, and with Emmett because I wanted to make sure she got them.

To this day, I have no idea what Emmett really said to her. We're cool. He only hits me if I fly at him or yell at Bella.

I've done that too, like right now. "Just ignore me—the crazy Cullen!" I put on my sunglasses and entered my car. "I know you can hear me, Bella!"

She held her face and walked off with Angela Weber. It looked like she was crying.

"Bella!" I went to get out of the car, concerned now.

"Edward!" Emmett warned.

I sped out of the school lot to drive around for an hour, completely blowing off baseball practice. Then I parked in the shadows, hidden, or so I thought.

"Edward," Jake said, entering my car. "Emmett sent me over, man. This is weird."

I shrugged, continuing to stare at the garage. "I miss her, and she won't let me come near her, so…this is a happy medium."

"Stalking?"

"Potato, pot_ah_to…" I waved my hand. "No one thinks secret admirers are creepy."

"That's because they leave flowers and move on," he laughed.

"Did she say anything about the flowers?" I asked.

He frowned. "She threw them in the garbage."

I whimpered, rubbing the ache out of my chest.

"Go home, have a beer or five, relax…Hell, call Lauren…I always feel better after a snow job."

I threw my head back to close my eyes.

"She was the first girl you were with. This always happens—feelin' lousy. It's normal the first few days." He patted my shoulder. "Take that." He threw a condom at me. "Go fuck something else. You'll see that it's not that serious—you will get laid again, bro."

"I'm still a virgin."

"Shhhit! Seriously?"

I nodded.

"You're…crying and upset and you didn't even—"

"Get out of my car."

He put his hands up and left.

I sped away from the curb.

Later that night, after I got into my father's whiskey, Dad stole my car keys from me. He understood. Believe it or not, after I lied—saying that I threw the party to mend my broken heart—my parents accepted it. Well, Mom accepted it, and Dad ignored me until today. They were also scared I'd stay away again. Apparently, they worried when they couldn't find me. I was only at Jake's.

Without much else to do tonight, Jasper and I watched _A Streetcar Named Desire_. It made its debut on television, while we took turns sipping from a gin bottle.

Dad likes whiskey, not gin, so he let us have that.

I couldn't even finish the movie without crying.

_Fucking Stanley. _

"Oh, I wish there was something I could do." Jasper rocked us back and forth.

I sniffled and hugged him tighter. "I feel so lonely I could die."

"You have me." He kissed my hair, and then it just got uncomfortable.

"Let go." I backed away and wiped my eyes.

"Oh, Ed…I was just being consoling." His eyes were wide.

"I know. It was just weird," I cried into my hands. "You're a real pal."

"I should go," he said.

"I'll walk you." I grabbed the gin and trailed behind him.

My parents had already gone to bed, so I just left out the front door with Jasper. I never walked him home. Instead, he followed me all the way to Bella's house.

"What are you going to do?" He pulled me into the bushes.

"I'm going to throw a rock and-and tell her how I feel." I stood up to do so.

Jasper pulled my arm back down. "That's Emmett's room, which one is Bella's?"

"Fuck…thanks. That was a close call." I sipped some gin. It's dark and I'm drunk, but I'm pretty sure it's the one off to the side of the house. "That one? I could have sworn it was this one…How do you know it's Emmett's?"

"Have you ever been in her room?" he asked. "I bet with the Three Musketeers that place is like a fortress."

"I saw it once when I had to take a piss the other day. She wasn't home yet, and Charlie let me wait for her…I really just wanted to be in her room. Charlie didn't know we had broken up yet. So, I lay in her bed to hug her blankets, but then I got mad…because of what she did…"

"Uh-oh…What'd you do?" Jazz asked.

My face crumbled for a second, and I let out a whimper. "I gave Elvis a mustache in every poster she has. She really likes James Dean, and I managed to make him look like _Nosferatu_."

"Who?" He made a face.

"It's old…silent movie from 1922. He looks like a fucked-up _Dracula_. I used a lipstick I found. . . she hates lipstick," I whined. "I was a horrible boyfriend. I never stopped, I always had to push—I hate my cock." I tilted the bottle back as traitorous tears spilled down my cheeks. "Oh, Jasper . . . I'm rotten, and she's wonderful. She was smart—she left me."

"Edward…" Jasper frowned. "That was pretty rotten and-and creepy."

"Look…" I showed him the bobby socks I stole that I've kept in my pocket. Then I held them to my nose to take a hearty whiff.

"Are those clean?" he asked.

I shrugged.

"You-you need more help than I can give you. Let's go home. We'll talk to your dad." Jasper tried to usher me away, but I shrugged him off.

"Hey, you've been chasing Alice for how long?"

"Six years." He nodded.

"Don't judge _me_." I placed my hand on my chest, staring up above. "If it's not that window, it's this one." I pointed.

We started throwing gravel at Bella's bedroom window. After the third one made contact and Bella didn't wake up, I grew desperate. "You think I can climb this?"

"It's a pipe." He pulled me down by my jacket. "You're going to scale shingles?"

I gasped. "I can climb the tree, get onto _that_ balcony, and then—"

"You'll break your legs—"

"Hey, STELLAAAAAA!" I shouted, palming my face, and falling to my knees in frustration. "I mean…Hey, BELLAAAAA!" I did it again, and then the light came on in her bedroom. "She's up!" I told Jazz. Then I turned and noticed he was gone.

"Jasper?"

"I'm over here," he whispered from behind a tree.

I nodded and looked up to the window. "Bella, my love—"

The window opened. "No, Edward." Charlie glared at me.

"Fuck…" I stepped back and tripped over the curb.

"Have you been drinking, son?" he called down to me.

"No." I hid the gin behind my back.

Another window opened, Emmett's window. "Edward?" Nope. It's Bella's window, and I was right the first time.

"Sorry!" Jasper called out. "But, watch out…Emmett's on the porch."

I didn't care. "Bella, I love you!" I widened my arms. "Please, baby…come down…we need to talk."

"Go home," Charlie said.

Bella frowned and tightened her robe around herself. "Edward, I—"

"You look beautiful tonight." My face crumbled, and I got down on my knees to chug some gin. "I just wanted to say that." I wiped my nose with my sleeve. "Why'd you leave me?"

"Edward, this is your conscience speaking!" Emmett boomed from behind me.

"I know it's really you, Emmett." I slumped my shoulders. "You can kill me now. I just wanted to tell Bella that I love her."

"Oh, Edward…" Bella cried.

"Don't cry, angel face…" I looked up to her, but tears clouded my vision. "Whatever I did, I'm sorry. We can work it out. I'll never touch you again—I—I'd consider myself lucky if I just got to be near you, talk to you…"

"You didn't do anything." She sniffled.

"Then—then—why—" I stumbled and fell back to the ground when I tried to get up.

"You're drunk—go home," Bella said. "I can't—I'm sorry."

"Hey!" I screamed. "I'm sorry about your posters!"

"That was you? I thought Paul…" She looked mad.

"I'll replace them!" I sobbed.

"You need to cool it with the alcohol." She gave me the middle finger.

"Can you throw me down a cigarette?" I felt my pockets for matches.

She closed the window.

"No—God—Bella, please—" I started to crawl toward her house, but Emmett held me back.

"Go home and go to bed, before you do or say something stupid that you'll regret." He held out his hand for mine.

I reluctantly took it, and he pulled me up.

"I'll take you home," he said. "Is Whitlock, your shadow, hiding somewhere?"

I sipped from the bottle. "Are—you going to pound on us?" I hiccupped.

Emmett shook his head no.

"Jazz, it's safe!"

Jasper came running out from behind the tree.

I looked back up to the windows, and Charlie was still staring. "G-goodnight, Chief!" I waved. "D-don't be mad. I love your daughter…that's not a crime, so…" I shrugged. "Do _you_ have any smokes?"

He laughed at me. "I should call your father."

"Where do you think I got the gin…" I made the bottle dance. "I'm not driving…YOUR DAUGHTER HATES ME AND I LOVE HER! That's what drove me to the bottle!"

"Edward!" Emmett shook me.

Charlie was laughing so hard. It made me laugh, and then vomit in the street.

"Go home, Edward!" Charlie shouted. "I'm phoning your father now. If I gotta be up for this, then he can be too." He closed the window.

"BELLA!" I cried. "Can you hear me? I'm not crazy. I love you, everything about you! Please take me back…" I puked some more.

"Please, just go home."

I looked up to see her window open just a little. Her lights were still off. "Please come down here. I promise, I—"

"It's not you, Edward," Bella cried.

"Please don't cry." I looked to Emmett. "Don't let her cry." Just as I lifted it to drink more, Emmett tore the bottle out of my hand.

"I think you had enough."

"I would—would have done all of this sober!" I widened my arms. "I'm crazy, Fuckward Cullen!"

"It's true," Jasper said.

Emmett shook his head. "You guys want a ride home?" He looked to his driveway.

"No…I'd rather walk. Thank you."

"Me too," Jasper said. "But…we're good. I'm not that drunk. I can handle my liquor better than Cullen."

"Fuck you…Fucksper…if I'm Fuckward, then you're Fucksper."

"Jesus…how much have you guys had to drink?" Emmett asked.

"A lot." I continued walking down the street. "I'm being held hostage at the Heartbreak Hotel!" I shouted.

"Edward, just because my father pities you doesn't mean another cop won't arrest you for disturbing the peace." Emmett laughed at me, and I felt like singing.

"_Well, if your baby leaves you_

_You got a tale to tell_

_Well, just take a walk down Lonely Street_

_To Heartbreak Hotel."_

I sang, and a few stray cats joined me.

"Fuck, yeah!" Jasper nodded, and then we both sang.

"_You'll be so lonely, baby_

_Well you'll be lonely_

_You'll be so lonely you could die…" _

And then we laughed our asses off.

"You guys are funny," Emmett chuckled, "sad but funny."

"What'd you say to Bella…to make her leave me?" My stomach rolled with nausea.

"I didn't say anything specific in regards to you…I just told her why Rosie and me aren't serious anymore."

"You love Rosalie?" I asked.

Emmett sipped some gin. "I do."

I didn't comment even if I wanted to, neither did Jasper—but we did share a look.

"I love her enough to let her go," Emmett laughed. "She's going off to do…whatever, and I'll be here. I love the garage. Having one was what I always wanted, and Paul's going to U-Dub in the fall. His father's insurance money is paying for that." It was the most I had ever heard Emmett speak without malice.

"If I asked, she might stay—I don't know, but she'll end up pregnant and hating me—maybe not right away, but in the long run." He guzzled the rest of the gin. "You two cats are depressing."

Jasper and I nodded. "You told Bella that, and she thinks that applies to me."

"Shouldn't it?" Emmett looked to me.

I shook my head no. "I'd give up everything I have just to be with her."

"You shouldn't have to," he replied. "I'm saving up and so is Dad. Bella should go to college, and we're going to try…"

"She's so smart," I whispered. "I just don't understand, though. She has a year before she graduates—more than. We'll see each other on weekends, and I'll call—"

"Edward," Emmett laughed bitterly, "you guys were together a little over a month. She broke it off before it got serious, so you can go to school, to spare you guys heartache—a clean break…How can you hold that against her? You'll have Bella here, and you'll probably do what you want at university—playing her dirty and whatnot."

"Now you're talking too much," I said.

"I have buddies at U-Dub . . . and they party. You—" he pointed to me, "you party hearty. I hear women are faster in college, too. You'll string her along, and then forget about her in a semester."

"How dare you…" I pushed him. "You don't know me."

He pushed me back, and I fell to the ground. "Keep your hands to yourself."

.

.

.

.

.

**…o.0…**

"Edward?" My mother has been walking on eggshells, thinking I'm going to run away. Where the fuck am I going to go? I have nothing.

"Peanut butter and banana—your favorite." Actually, it's Elvis's favorite.

And once again, I am reminded that I was only truly myself in front of Bella. That's why I was always so nervous. She just drew the real Edward out of me. I could be goofy and say what was on my random mind, and she adored me for it.

Or, maybe she didn't and that's why she broke up with me.

Mom left the plate on my nightstand.

It stayed there until Dad came home later that night. "This isn't normal, Edward. You and Bella were only dating three weeks."

"Six weeks! We were together more than a month!" The outburst surprised even me. Today, I can't seem to feel anything, not even hunger, but Dad hit a nerve.

"Even so—"

"How can you say that?" I was irrational. In my head, the amount of time we spent together didn't matter. We saw each other every day, and we went out and necked, and she touched my penis. "You don't understand!"

"Have you tried dating other girls?"

"I don't want them."

"Have you tried asking anyone out? You might _get_ interested. I hear the Hale girl is single?" Dad asked and my blood boiled.

"Ice cunt—"

"Excuse me?"

"I can't." I moaned into my pillow.

"The Hales are coming for dinner tomorrow. You can . . . take a bath and make an effort."

"I bathe!" I spat. "I did the other day," I whispered.

"Edward, get your ass in the shower and go hang out with your friends!" He pulled the covers off of me. "I just saw Bella at the movies when I dropped your brother off. Her life didn't stop."

"What?" I hopped out of bed with a fury. "Why isn't she home crying…mourning her loss?" I wiped my eyes. "Oh, no…that's right. She didn't want me." I jumped off my bed. "I have to talk to her, make her see—"

"Christ, Edward." He pulled me back and forced me into the shower when I tried to go to the movies.

The next day my mother came home with a leather jacket for me. It had James Dean, Brando—badass—written all over it, but it meant nothing to me now.

The girl I needed it for was gone.

I still wore the fucking thing.

Other girls liked it. Rosalie really liked it.

And my father really liked Rosalie.

She scared the fuck out of me when she flirted with my father. Even my mother didn't like it. I heard her tell my father that Rosalie crossed a line.

Dad denied it.

Never in my life had I hated anyone as much as I do her.

I asked Jake what I should do. He knows everything when it comes to girls. He also remained neutral—told me Emmett was a blind fool.

Jake said to fuck Rosalie, and then dump her. Apparently, that's the worst payback there is, as far as jilting a female is concerned.

"I'm so glad you asked me out." Ice Cunt checked her ruby red lips in my visor. "Where are we going?"

"I don't care," I said.

"How about the Chinese restaurant?"

"Fine." I pulled off toward Charlie Chan's.

"It's too bad about Jimmy and Jessica…But it's cool because Bella agreed to go to the prom with him—"

I swallowed, refusing to let that get to me. "Yeah, guess I lost my date too."

"We can go." She placed her hand on my thigh.

"Touch my cock." I tried that one out.

She gasped.

I chuckled and continued to drive. "You fucking tease." I spat.

"Edward Cullen!"

"Oh, fuck you!"

"You never will with that attitude," she said.

I raised a brow and didn't say anything for the remainder of the ride.

We ate.

I paid.

And we wound up on the 101 overlooking the cliffs.

"Why are you so quiet?" Rosalie asked.

"I have nothing to say." I stared up at the moon.

"You're so handsome—all serious and stoic." She nestled into my outstretched arm. Rosalie felt good against me, but still wrong. "I didn't break you guys up."

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Can we go in the backseat?" she asked.

I raised a brow and followed her lead.

We kissed.

I rounded second.

Third.

And when my pants came off, I wanted to stop.

But I didn't.

"You sure?" I asked.

Rosalie swallowed, licking her bottom lip, spread out under me. "Yes…make love to me," she whispered.

"Hold on." Nervous as all hell, I grabbed the condom from out of my wallet.

"Wait!"

I paused, still breathing heavily.

"You're taking me to prom, right? And we'll go steady?"

"Steady?" I asked. "I thought you didn't go…steady."

"With you, yeah…My mother loved you—thinks we'll have beautiful children." Her hands ran up my middle, and then down—and then she stroked my cock, which made me convulse and groan. "Don't you think about that?" Her hand went faster, and I leaned forward, "Getting married and starting a family…"

"G-give it a kiss." I pursed my lips down.

She slapped my cheek. "What kind of girl do you think I am?"

"You'll fuck me just so I'll take you to prom, but you won't suck me off for—well, what do you want for it?" I asked.

She looked up, contemplative, and I wrapped my hand around hers. She can think and give me a hand job at the same time. "I want your class ring—a promise, so that when we're at different schools, we'll be true."

I threw my head back, laughed, and smacked her hand away before I threw the condom out the window. "Get dressed." I threw her panties at her.

"Edward!"

I shrugged and crawled into the front seat while I held my pants together.

I didn't even get off.

My fingers fumbled. She was wet, warm, and it smelled really nice—she said she came.

"You got what you wanted, right?" I asked.

She knocked me with her skirt as she came back to the passenger seat. "What I wanted? You didn't even scratch the surface yet of what I want from you." She gave me a soft kiss.

I pushed her face away—the face I used to get up and go to school for every morning now makes me sick. "You got off?" I placed my fingers under my nose. It was the first time I had ever touched a girl like that. And no matter how much I hated her, I still wondered if I did well.

"That was magical."

"Good." I fastened my pants and then backed away from the cliffs.

"We're magic." She twirled her fingers in my hair.

"We're fucked."

Twenty minutes later, when we were parked outside her house, she called Bella mousy—told me to stop pinning because Bella is already sleeping with Jimmy.

I didn't believe her.

She swore it.

I threw her out of my car—as gently as possible—told her to go fuck herself and to stay away from my family.

She cried. I made Rosalie, that evil bitch, cry. I didn't even know that was possible.

I laughed the whole way home, while a part of me died inside.

**Thank you for reading. **

**I know many of you will likely flounce after Edward's last stunt, but . . . **

**I promise, this angst won't be lasting long. We're actually close to the end of this small tale. **


	15. Eclipse

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended.**

****I'm aware some of you may flounce, but keep in mind that I promised a HEA, and there's one chapter left. Then, I plan to write a couple of future takes, just because I'd like a glimpse into their future. Angst city, and if you get through it, you might as well stay around. (shrugs) Do other authors get persecuted for their story directions? (taps chin) Anyway, enjoy!**

"**Made in the Shades" **

**Chapter Fifteen: Eclipse**

**(Bella POV)**

A soft knock broke me from my reverie, yet I remained still—to act asleep.

"Bells?" Dad whispered softly. "Baby, I brought you a sandwich." I felt the bed dip beside me. "I know you're awake."

Slowly, I turned over but tried to keep my face covered. "Thanks," I rasped, and then cleared my throat.

Charlie reached out to push the hair away from my face. "Tell me what to do."

My lip quivered, and I bit it down.

"You're moping around like the walking dead. I—I'm at my wits end here." He rested his hand on my shoulder.

"I'm sorry," I cried. "I promise…I'll make dinner tomorrow. I just—"

"Bells, I don't care if you never set foot in a kitchen again." He smiled. "It's not about that." He reached behind me for my pillow. "Sit up."

I sat up, while he rearranged the pillows behind me.

"Now talk to me . . . I might surprise you with all the knowledge and wisdom I have. It's all stocked up." He pointed to his temple.

I giggled, only to start crying again. "I did the right thing. He can't stay here."

He gave me a slight nod and gestured for me to continue. "What else?"

I shrugged. "I—I didn't think it'd hurt this bad. I miss him, and . . . I might have missed my shot. It's really over now, Daddy," I sobbed, and he hugged me tightly. "He doesn't even act like I exist anymore. I kept trying to—like, out of sight out of mind? And now . . . Why—why—I don't—it hurts." I continued to cry.

"Shhh." He rubbed my back. "Maybe . . . maybe he's trying to get you back by giving you the cold shoulder? But I guarantee—Bells, listen to your dad here—if you want him—if _you_—he's there."

"No." I sniffled.

"Wanna make a bet?" He leaned away to grin at me.

I shook my head no. "You think so?"

He nodded.

"What about the other stuff? What if he goes away and forgets me? What if—"

Charlie placed his finger to my lips. "I can't answer that for you. All I know is Seattle's not that far . . . Look, honestly, I hate that you're heartbroken. I hate seeing you like this. You're my baby girl, and I don't like to see you hurt. No boy will ever be good enough for you. Edward's a nice kid, a little kooky, but I never had any problems with him. I also know that you did this." He poked my arm. "So, my advice to you is . . ." He trailed off, blowing out a breath. "Hold on until you can let go."

"What?" My shoulders dropped.

"I'm no expert on love and relationships. Maybe you should talk to Mrs. Cullen? All I know is if it hurts to be away from him, don't. And…if you truly don't want to be with the boy, but it hurts now to leave him, be with him until you can let go."

I bit my lip while wringing my hands together. "I think I love him," I cried. "He said he loved me, too…but—he can't stay here. He can't waste his life in this town."

"Why would it be a waste?"

"Because. . . once upon a time, if I asked, he would have stayed."

"And I bet it's the same now." He placed his hand on mine. "What's the worst that could happen, huh? He becomes a cop like me? Or, he learns the ropes at the garage? Or, he works at the factory? What's so bad about staying here?"

"He deserves more. He's so smart." I hugged myself and rested my head on my knees. "He wants to write—wants to teach."

"You can write anywhere." Dad shook his head, like he was frustrated with me. "You were doing okay, what changed?"

"I just—I can't hide how miserable I am anymore," I whispered.

"You're going to school tomorrow." He stood up. "Edward's there if you want him; keep that in mind." He patted my head. "Bells, if you love him, be with him." He touched my cheek. "You're only hurting yourself and him . . . You're also not a fortune teller, and so you don't know what will happen." He turned and left my room. "Goodnight," he called back to me.

"'Night," I whispered.

. . .o.0. . .

The next morning, I dragged myself out of bed, and then got ready for school. Today, I actually did my hair and put on some rouge. Usually, I don't wear makeup to school, but I looked pastier than what's normal for me. I also dressed in my most form-fitting skirt and wore my blue silk blouse.

Edward loved this top.

I love Edward and so, after a lot of thinking, I decided that I'd talk to him today—or beg him to take me back. I found begging to be highly doubtful, but not impossible.

"You're quiet today," I whispered to Emmett. We were at the red light, the only one in town.

He shrugged, wearing a frown and staring straight ahead. "Got a lot on my mind."

I nodded. "Everything okay with you and Rosalie?"

He opened his mouth and nothing came out.

"You can tell me. Sorry I've been out of it, um. . ."

He looked to me briefly, and then took off. "She went on a date with Cullen last night."

"Wh-wh-huh?" I spluttered and tears immediately filled my eyes. "Why? Why would she—Emmett, no," I cried.

He pulled over to the side of the road. "They make sense, wealthy families, they're going to college . . . I'm sorry. I told her I didn't care—that I was fine with it. She needs to move on. You need to move on—hell, we all need to move on." He groaned and sat back.

I shook my head. "I don't understand you and Rosalie."

"I love her. There's not much for _you_ to understand."

"And I love Edward—"

"No, you don't," he laughed.

"How—how can you say that?" I seethed, balling my hands into fists. "You say you love Rosalie, that vile, evil bitch!"

"Watch your mouth." He seemed shocked by my vocabulary. "She's real. That's who she is, and I love her anyway." He rolled his eyes. "But relax . . . Cullen probably got what he wanted, and Rosie will be mine by lunch time."

"What? You people make me sick!" I shouted and went for the door. "I'll walk to school."

He pulled me back. "Just relax—"

"Take me home."

"You haven't been to school in three days. You're going. Dad said to make sure you go."

I gritted my teeth and sat back. "Keep Rosalie away from me," I said, turning to face him. "You can be ignorant and chauvinistic and treat me like a child. But that's my house too, and I say she's not welcome. You hear me, Emmett?" I hollered.

He nodded as he drove off. "I'm sorry."

"I can't believe it doesn't bother you."

"What choice do I have?" he whispered.

"Uh…you can forget about her!" I stomped my foot. "I hate this, I hate her, and a part of me hates you. I can't believe Edward went out with her," I sobbed into my hands. "And it's my fault."

"It's mine." He rubbed my back. "I should have never interfered. Had I known Rosie just wanted . . . I would have never gone along with her."

"W-wanted what?" I sniffled.

"Him."

**. . .o.0. . .**

Edward's car wasn't parked in its usual spot when we arrived. I waited, wanting—needing to finally talk to him, but Alice linked her arm with mine. She ushered me into the school and to my locker.

With my head nearly buried on top of my books, I cried, and Alice rubbed my back.

"Hey, doll!" I heard Rosalie approach Alice.

"Hey, yourself." Alice's reply was stiff, and I kept my head hidden like a coward.

"Don't be so crude—"

"How was your date last night?" Alice asked.

There was a pause before Rosalie giggled. "Amazing and sad . . ."

That caught my attention—wondering what was so amazing.

"I had to do something to figure out something I knew all along," Rosalie sighed, and I could just imagine her admiring her nails.

"What happened?" Alice inquired.

"We had sex," Rosalie whispered. "It was fantastic—magic—but it made me realize how much I love Emmett. Edward offered me his class ring, but I had to decline."

"Oh, yeah?" Alice nearly shouted. Then I was jostled. Alice had grabbed me away from my locker to slam it closed and make me face Rosalie. "What about her?"

My eyes were clamped shut.

"What about Bella? I thought we were friends—the three of us—all bitchiness aside?" Alice's grip intensified on my arms. "I never thought you'd go so far—Bella, do something!" She shook me.

I opened my eyes and tears ran down my cheeks. "You did that?" I whispered. "I mean, he-he did—"

Rosalie looked ashamed now and refused to look at me. "It was bound to happen. If it wasn't me, it'd be some other girl. Honestly. You two don't mesh well anyway. He's—"

My hand came out and smacked her across the face—not wanting to hear another comparison—the Swan trash and the Cullen gold.

Rosalie's mouth was agape as she held her face.

"I hate you! Stay away from me—my house!" I stomped my foot, wanting to stomp on her.

Rosalie didn't reply, walking around Alice and me and away.

That was when I saw him. Edward was now by his locker, gathering his books for the day. He looked handsome and sad, and he never looked my way.

"I can't believe you did that!" Alice hugged me tight. "Oh, Bella . . . I've been wanting to do that for four years."

"Bitchiness aside?" I sadly smirked into her hair.

"Well, yeah." Alice pulled back.

Edward wasn't in English class, nor was he at lunch. While I waited in the cafeteria, I grew impatient and walked out to his car. Sadly, he wasn't alone. He sat with Jasper, and they were arguing about something, so I let them be.

Getting through the rest of the school day was torturous. I counted the minutes and prayed the final bell would ring.

When last period ended, I went through my normal routine. I gathered my books, said goodbye to Alice, and then hoped to meet Edward at his car.

Again, he wasn't alone. This time Lauren Mallory stood outside his window. She laughed and flirted, and I hid behind a neighboring Dodge.

When Edward's hand came out to drape around her waist, I felt sick—like I might puke on the pavement—and left.

. . .0.o. . .

Work was a nice distraction that afternoon. Once again, I found myself hiding from the outside world. That's something I wish I could tell Edward. I wasn't only hiding from him, I was trying to stay away from everything, and yet still continue like nothing had happened.

Jake told me that maybe I should just move on, date others because that's the way you get over someone. Alice had told me the same thing—that she felt better about Paul after hanging out with Jasper.

Only, I don't have a Jasper.

Edward was the lone boy who liked me—showed interest—but how much did he really like me, if he was so fast to mess around with Rosalie?

Speaking of that evil troll, Rosalie showed up at around six—crying and pleading to talk with Emmett. She'd made a huge mistake.

He left with her, like he always does, and I was just waiting around to close up.

At a quarter to eight, I finally left the office to see if Jimmy or Jake were still working. Jake couldn't be found, but I saw Jimmy washing his hands in the sink.

"I was going to leave, um, are you done?" I whispered.

He nodded as he turned, grabbing a towel to try his hands. "Yup. Mr. Samson can pick her up in the morning." He lightly kicked a tire.

"Okay."

He dropped his shoulders and stared at me with pity in his eyes. "Do you want to maybe . . . I don't know. Go get a shake and talk?"

I shook my head no, my face crumbling as tears welled up and spilled down to my cheeks.

"Hey . . ." he said softly, coming over to awkwardly hug me. "Bells, what's going on?"

I swallowed. "Nothing."

"It's still because of that Cullen asshole?" He quirked a brow.

"Maybe," I admitted.

"I heard . . . what he did?" He tilted his head to the side. "I know you're hurt, but honey—" he wrapped his arms around me, "you guys weren't together. I mean, I'm not defending him. I'm just—well, Bella, I hate seeing you hurt. I don't know what I should say." He trailed his hand through his hair. "I knew he'd break your heart."

"You did?" I whispered.

He nodded. "I'm sorry."

I shook my head. "I broke up with him. If we were still together, he might not have done what he did—but that doesn't mean he wouldn't have eventually . . ."

"Exactly." He smiled, looking so genuine it made my belly ache.

"I'm gonna go," I said, pulling away.

He kept hold of my hand. "Want a ride? Your helmet is—" He left me to go over to the work bench. "Right here." He smirked.

It made me smile. "I'd rather walk."

He nodded, keeping his gaze down. "Mind if I walk with you? Well, if you don't want my company, I'll walk behind you. I just—I want to make sure you're okay."

His kindness made me want to sob, but I reined it in. "Thank you."

He put the helmet down and came over to hold my face. "I hate that you're so sad—wish I could take it away."

My lip quivered, and I bit it down. "We would have made more sense."

"I've always been crazy about you." He pushed my hair away from my forehead. "I always thought it'd be me and you, someday." He looked nervous now and went to back away.

I liked what he said, him wanting me made me feel a little better. "Really?"

He grinned. "Yes."

"Kiss me." I blurted, but didn't regret it just yet.

He shook his head no. "I really dig you, Bella. But, I don't want to be the guy—"

I jumped to land a small kiss on his lips, maybe wanting him to be "the" guy.

It'd make so much sense. In a moment of clarity, I saw my future. Having known Forks was eternally my future, I saw us—him working here alongside Emmett, me working the office, and then we'd have babies, everything so domestic and normal. He wouldn't have to change. I wouldn't have to change, and everything would flow naturally.

Had I never met "him", I would have probably ended up with Jimmy. We've known each other since we were in diapers.

"Bella." He breathed, running his thumb along my lower lip. "We shouldn't—"

"Please." I was crying again and hated it, but this time I was desperate—holding on to hopefully happy thoughts.

He slowly closed the distance, first touching his nose to mine and then his lips. He kissed me softly and nothing happened. I didn't feel tingly—like I might cry, in a good way, and hysterically laugh at the same time. My stomach didn't flip.

Wanting to feel that, I pulled him down to me—sticking my tongue into his mouth and holding him close.

He pulled away to pant. "Bella, stop—" He steadied my hips as his breaths remained labored. "Go on a date with me. This weekend? We'll go to—"

He stopped talking when I pulled on his top.

We didn't talk anymore after that. He stopped fighting me, and I tried my hardest to feel something—encouraging him on, wanting to forget, and hoping to enjoy it.

Jimmy seemed frenzied, like he was lost in me, like he was feeling the way I wanted to, and I hated him for it. "Touch me," I whispered, longing running through my veins and staring at him through half-hooded eyes. In the dim light, his stature and stance reminded me of "him".

"No. I'm probably a fool, but—"

Out of breath myself, I kissed him deep again—wondering why he wanted to stop when he never had before. Edward always pushed, he always wanted more, and I always stopped him. "Just—" I smiled, leaning my forehead to his. "Go with the flow, baby."

He let out a deep throaty groan. I kept my eyes closed and let him lift me onto the hood of a car. My legs came to wrap around him, and our mouths met once more. "My Romeo . . . you make me happy," I sighed, leaning back and letting him unbutton my coveralls.

"You're gorgeous." He lifted my top, sneaking his hands under while his mouth attacked my neck.

Our bodies rocked, and I finally felt whole—complete, and wanted so much more. When his hand went lower, I moaned loudly. I had imagined this moment in time, over and over—the day when Edward finally touched me. I wanted to cry tears of joy again.

"Is this okay?" he whispered.

"More." I held him so tightly to me and felt his finger enter me. It made me gasp and arch my back and spread my legs. He really knew what he was doing, and he groaned over and over in my ear—getting animalistic like he always does. God . . . how I missed those growls.

He left me for a second, and then his hand came back—only it felt sharp, like more, and I felt fuller. Suddenly, it didn't feel good—more like pain instead of pleasure. "Not so—"

He went faster and faster, and I stiffened. "Edward, stop—" I hated myself for it.

"What?"

I opened my eyes and saw Jimmy, panting as he held me close.

"I'm—" I didn't know what to say, but he hadn't stopped yet. He just went faster and harder. "Stop." I tried to push his hand away.

"What the—" He pulled his hand out of my underwear and jumped away from me.

Feeling the sting between my legs, I closed them to make it go away, only it didn't. "I'm sorry." I cried as I started to button my coveralls.

Jimmy was fully clothed and stared down at the ground. "Bella—"

"I'm sorry." I palmed my face to sob.

"No, no, no—" He ran over to hug me. "I'm sorry. I didn't—Christ, did I hurt you? You wanted—you asked me, and I—"

"I know," I whispered.

"You called me Edward."

"No, you must be mistaken," I lied, pushing him away and hopping from the car. The movement made me wince.

"I could have sworn—"

"This was wrong." I breathed, hugging myself.

His eyes widened. "It wasn't. We just—we have to take it slow. You know? I just—Bella, I don't know what to say."

"I have to use the bathroom." I pointed.

He nodded. "I'll be here when you get out. Um, I'll take you home?"

"No," I said, stepping closer to the door. "Don't tell anyone?"

"I wouldn't." He shook his head no. "I just, will you ever want me?" He looked so vulnerable—he looked how I felt, how he probably feels.

My response was to cry and run into the bathroom.

After waiting what felt like an eternity, I used the toilet, and my eyes widened—seeing the blood on my panties.

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…**0.o…**

"She lied!" Alice slammed my locker closed.

"Can you stop doing that?" I asked.

She took a hold of my arms and shook me, and I wished she'd stop doing that, too. "Did you hear me? Rosalie lied. She never had sex with Edward."

"What?" I hugged myself.

"Jasper told me. Edward tells Jasper everything. Honestly, those boys are a little too close for comfort." She shrugged. "It's weird, but that's beside the point. He denied her. She said some bad stuff about you, and Edward told her to stick it where the sun don't shine." She smiled. "Oh, and she also said she'd sleep with him, but only if he gave her his class ring. He said no. Don't you know what this means?"

I didn't reply.

"He's still your boy!" She squealed. "He still has feelings—that's what it means."

I shook my head no. "We-we had something, but maybe I should leave it alone."

"No, Bella. Get your man before he starts dating other girls. He has a date with Lauren tonight."

I groaned. "I hate this."

"I know you do. Heck, I hate it too."

"I did something bad," I whispered.

"What?" She waited, blinking and licking her lips.

"I—" I couldn't talk about it. "I've decided to leave Edward alone." I looked down.

"Bella, that's stupid. You've been being stupid." She put her hands on her hips.

With nothing left to say to her, I held my books close and turned to leave. While I walked, I bumped into Jimmy.

"Hey," he greeted.

"Hi." I looked up to him, and then around him. Edward stood, leaning back on the lockers, looking so cool and handsome in his leather jacket. His hair was a wreck, and his arms were draped around both Lauren and Jessica. The sight made me queasy.

"We should hang out tonight."

"I'm sorry." With nothing more to tell Jimmy, I left the school—passing Edward as I kept my head down. I actually didn't want him to see me. It had been two days since I washed my hair, and I looked horrible.

The walk to the garage was short. Emmett was there already, and so was Rosalie. They looked so happy.

The sight made me run from the garage—away from them and toward my house. I ran so fast, my sides ached and I panted for air.

"Bella!"

I stopped to sob and hold my knees, hearing Mrs. Cullen shout for me.

"Bella, honey . . ." She sprinted toward me with her pruning shears in her hands. "What's the matter?"

I was crying so hard, snot was everywhere and I could barely see her.

"Come here." She hugged me tight in the middle of the street, and then ushered me to her house, just as Edward's car pulled into the driveway. "Let's go talk."

"I—I—" I stared at Edward, who wore a smile and had a swagger as he left his car. "I can't."

"Oh." She wrapped her arms around me again. "We can walk. You don't have to talk to Edward at all." As if he heard his name, his head whipped to us.

I pushed out of her arms. "I have to be home. Th-thank you."

Then, like I hadn't been interrupted, I ran the rest of the way home. As soon as the door closed behind me, I slid down to sit and cry some more. I didn't think hurt like this could exist. Never in my life had I given much thought to God and religion.

But if God exists, why would he have hurt me so badly?

"Bella?" Edward asked and knocked once.

Wincing and cringing in place, I tried to stop crying and stand to get the door. Knowing I couldn't hide my tear-stained cheeks, I didn't try. I opened the door for Edward, but couldn't look at him.

"You dropped your books in front of my house," he whispered, handing them to me.

"Thanks," I said.

"Why were you crying?"

I opened my mouth and looked up to him, hating God again. Edward is always so beautiful. "I just—I had a bad day."

"Had a fight with Jimmy?" He leaned back, lighting a cigarette and resting his forearm on my door, like I might close it on him. "What were you playing at?"

"What?" I sniffled.

He chuckled, and I was able to get a good look at him. "You're so good at that innocent shit—that act." He was different somehow, not as soft. "Maybe I am crazy." He took a drag from his barely finished smoke and flicked it out into the street. "See you around . . ." He turned to run down the steps.

"Wait!"

He stopped, but kept his back to me.

And I wanted to beg—ask him to take me back, do anything I could to have Edward.

But before I could get the words out, he shook his head without looking back to me, and got into his car to peel away from the curb.

**Thank you for reading**

**One more chap left, and then future outtakes :)**

**Quick Note: Back in those days, college wasn't for everyone. It was still possible to land a decent job with just a high school diploma. **


	16. Only You

**Disclaimer: **Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. This is a period fic-let (short story) which will be told in Edward's point of view. Loosely based on William Kotzwinkle's "Jack in the Box". Again, no copyright infringement is intended.

**Beta'd by HollettLA. I flove her! **

**PLEASE READ: **Many of you wondered how I might wrap this up with one chapter. Well, the way I "had" it written, ended the story. The way it "was" written didn't include ch15—the Bella POV—either. Also, this chapter is written differently— **in a series of drabbles**. I think I wrote it this way to somehow lessen the blow? Eddie is a bad, bad boy, and you may not like his behavior, but hang in tight. I'm writing about teenagers, and I don't know about you, but I hated being a hormonal teenager. LOL. Luckily, the teenage heart is easily mended.

**BTW – **I'm so sorry for the wait. I was too wrapped up, bitten by many a plot bunny for my other fic, so it took me a while to get back into this. Also, I accidentally deleted the reworked chap. I reworked it while it was loaded to fanficnet, and I erased it, because I'm an idiot, and I had to start this chap over again.

******The beginning might be confusing, as time and girls pass within a few sentences. I didn't realized it'd be confusing until my amaze-balls beta pointed it out.

It's to show how confused Edward is—how much he just doesn't give a fuck anymore. Heartache can change/mature people, but not always in the best way.

**Okay, I'm shutting up now. Please enjoy!**

* * *

><p>"<strong>Made in the Shades"<strong>

_A round man cannot be expected to fit in a square hole right away. He must have time to modify his shape_

_–Mark Twain._**  
><strong>

**Chapter Sixteen: Only You**

"Where do you want to go?" I asked Lauren.

We had just left Brother Bruno's, the pizzeria, and I wanted to go home.

"The cliffs?"

"You got it." I smirked and put the car in drive.

On our way, we passed Bella walking with Angela Weber by the diner. We were stopped at a red light.

And while my arm was wrapped around Lauren's shoulders, I made eye contact with Bella and kissed Lauren.

Her face paled and fell.

As soon as we drove away, I pushed Lauren off of me.

"Wow…you're _some_ kisser." She fanned her face.

"I'm taking you home," I said.

Lauren placed her hand on my thigh before I took off toward her house. "No. We're having a good time, right?" she asked.

Vicki Johnson—a redhead—had said the same thing two weeks before prom. She asked if we were having a blast, and I lied—saying yes.

And so I stayed with Vicki. The date I had with Lauren was a total failure, but she told her friends how amazing I was—she lied.

Vicki and I drove around with nowhere to go.

"My parents are away for the night," Vicki informed me. I think her name was Vicki. But damn, her hair wasn't red. Which one was this again?

"Cool…where do you live?" I never picked her up from her house.

Jessica—no, Vicki . . . no Lauren? Is that her name? All these girls and their girly names . . . Who can keep track? Especially when I don't give a fuck. The only name I can't seem to forget is Bella.

Anyway, Jessica was being a raging bitch. Who knew she was so demanding? I'd fingered her for nearly a half-hour, and she didn't come. Yes, before I met up with Vicki, I was with Jessica, who was uncomfortable. She wanted to change seats, because Bella kept staring.

Bella doesn't look at me unless I'm with another girl. And I always want her attention. I want her to see that I'm not a loser, that other girls do want me, so that maybe she'll change her mind and want me back.

I told Jessica (I think) no; we weren't going to change seats.

She made me stop and called me a willy-nilly-freakazoid.

Having no reply to that, I left her at the movies and left the movies with Vicki. No, I mean . . .

"Where am I going?" I asked again. She was too busy checking her lipstick in her compact mirror.

"Elm," Vicki, the brunette, said, which is the same block Bella lives on. And since she's a brunette, I think I'm off the mark with her name by a mile.

"Okay." I drove her to her house.

She thought I was coming inside, but I drove away instead. There was no way I could do what she had in mind. The girls, they come and go, and I don't give a fuck about any of them—none of them—and I keep waiting. Not only am I waiting for Bella, but the hope I have for us is waning, and so I'm dating frequently with new hopes: hopes that maybe someone else might appeal to me, hopes that I'll feel . . . something.

When I pulled into my driveway, Jasper was sitting on my porch steps.

"What the hell?" He widened his arms, coming toward me. "Where have you been?"

I shrugged, slamming the car door shut. "Around."

"You haven't been at school." He wore a long face.

"We graduate soon, does it matter?" I laughed.

"I guess not." He kicked a rock across the pavement. "Look, Bella was pissed at you, but I spoke to her—"

"Why—why w-would you do that?" I spluttered, anger bubbling up inside of me.

"Relax." Jasper placed his hands on my shoulders. "I wanted to cool her down. She sees you with all these girls…but she bought some crap I said about men having urges. Apparently, Emmett told her the same thing." He shrugged, backing away from me. "She's hurting, too, Edward."

"Bella broke up with me." I chuckled bitterly. "_She_ didn't want _me_." I pointed to myself. "And there's nothing wrong with what I'm doing—there's nothing wrong with me."

"Ed, I know that." He patted my back. "All I meant—"

"Just . . ." Putting my hands up, I tried walking around him.

"Don't run away." He smirked at me. "I can't believe you ditched Jessica and left with Kate—that shit was scandalous."

"Kate! That was her name," I laughed at myself. "How's Alice?" I asked.

He scrunched his nose. "Still single and _still_ won't say yes to going steady, but we're on for prom."

Raising my brows and blowing out a breath, I asked, "Wanna get drunk and listen to records?"

"Sounds good." He slapped my bicep, and we entered my house.

.

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.

The stars were out tonight. There were so many and it makes me think of her, only because every star seemed like a possibility.

"You should say yes to Jazz," I told Alice.

"People will talk," she sighed. "He's such a nerd."

"He's loyal, and he cares about you. He'd treat you like a princess." I started the car. "Where do you want to go?"

"Anywhere, but home. If we go to Forks, I'll run into Jazz, and he won't leave me alone or . . . Bella. She's so fucking pitiful these days."

"Don't say her name around me." I spat.

Alice frowned. "Don't tell anyone about tonight."

Looking at her as though she were insane, I shook my head. "We didn't do anything," I said. "I'd never—_never_—hurt Jasper that way. He's my best friend." Worried, I wondered if my feelings were wrong about her—thinking she might be another liar, another Rosalie.

She laughed. "I know, Edward. Golly, I'd never hurt Bella that way either, but people will talk if they see us together. Drop me off at the bakery. I'll walk home." She rushed out, and I instantly calmed.

"You should say yes to Jasper." I gave her a brief, pointed glance as I backed out of the parking spot. "You really should . . . before he moves on. I think he might be at that point," I lied, trying to help my buddy out. Believe it or not, Alice is a pretty cool chick. She approached me after my date with Rosalie. Well, she screamed at me.

Rosalie went around telling everyone that we had sex.

So, I did the right thing and told Emmett the truth—that we hadn't. I don't know who Rosalie told, but I wanted to clear the air with Emmett because they had gotten back together. He told me they usually do see other people when they break up—said it was no big deal—but I saw the hurt on his face.

"And you should slow down before you lose Bella forever," Alice said.

.

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.

.

Coming home from another pointless date, I sat in my car and waited for the current song on the radio to end.

_Sincerely, oh yes, sincerely _

_'Cause I love you so dearly _

_Please say you'll be mine _

_Sincerely, oh you know how I love you _

_I'll do anything for you_

_Please say you'll be mine _

_Oh Lord, won't you tell me why, I love that girl so _

_She doesn't want me _

_But I'll never never never never let her go!_

At that, I shut down the car and rapidly left it.

"You've changed, Edward Cullen." The hedges were talking to me again.

"Go home, Tanya."

"I'm fifteen now." She came out of hiding.

"Oh, yeah?" I lit a cigarette in my driveway. "Come here and give me a kiss."

"What?" She stopped walking.

"I said, kiss me…don't make me say it again." I leaned back against my car and stared at her.

"No!" She stepped back.

I chuckled, blowing my smoke up and into the air.

"I don't like you anymore. You've changed." She started walking closer.

"I've been sad." I shrugged. "You really don't want to kiss me?"

She hugged herself while shaking her head.

"No?" I jutted my lower lip out. "Peanut says you kiss really well."

"Jared looks and acts like the old you, sweet, and funny, and soft." She was close enough for me to grab, so I did. Then she gasped when I pulled her chin to my face. "Please don't hurt me," she whispered.

"Shhh." I rubbed her cheek, staring down into her innocent eyes. There's so much she doesn't understand—so much that I don't understand. She's my neighbor, my annoying as fuck neighbor, but she's a kid—a curious little kid—with an affliction for boys. "Kiss me."

"No," she cried, and tears started falling down her chubby cheeks.

Swallowing and searching her eyes for something, I gently kissed each tear. "Don't be in such a rush to grow up," I whispered. "Save your kisses for boys who make you smile—who buy you flowers and milkshakes." I let go of her face. "In two years, you're going to be some heartbreaker."

"Is-is this what love does to you?" she whispered, gesturing to me.

"It's what it did to me." I looked down to my shoes. Even from this angle, I didn't recognize myself anymore.

.

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"Didn't you used to date Bella Swan?" Irina, the new girl, asked. She's a junior and is very beautiful. I didn't ask her out. Like the bulk of my dates, this one fell in my lap.

I nodded, pulling her against my side while Jake and Angela Weber serenaded us from my backseat. His car is laid up, and he asked to double—doesn't bring chicks home.

And he said something about quiet girls with glasses being secretly fast.

"Is she sick or something?" the blonde next to me inquired.

"Who?"

"Bella, she's in my history class, and . . . well, she looks sick." That made _me_ feel sick, made my stomach churn. "But isn't that her over there? Maybe we should give her a ride home?"

Ignoring her words, I asked, "You want to get out of here? You're not watching the movie." I didn't care to see Bella, and I don't care if she sees me anymore. I did look and spied her sitting at a picnic table near the concession stand—alone. Emmett, her guardian, was around here somewhere.

"Sure."

Hearing no complaints from Jake and Angela, I left the drive-in.

When we finally arrived at the cliffs, Irina became nervous. She scooted away from me and stared out the window, glancing at me in her periphery. "I've never been here before," she whispered.

I didn't comment.

"I just…Angela asked me to come, so…" She trailed off.

My backseat was empty now. Jake had taken Angela down to the beach, where there is more legroom.

"Do you want me to take you home?" I asked.

"Yes." She held her sweater together and sat back.

I inched closer and wrapped my arm around her. "Are you sure?" I nuzzled my nose against her cheek. "I can make you feel good," I whispered, running my palm down her thigh.

She sighed, parting her legs just a little. "Slow—wait—no."

I smiled, tilting her chin up and capturing her lips with mine. "You smell really pretty." I thumbed her cheek.

"I didn't know I'd be here with you." She gulped. "Angela said senior, but you—Edward Cullen—make me nervous."

"Me?" I laughed. "Why would I—wait, you're the new girl. You don't know me—"

"I only moved from Port Angeles. They even talk about you over there—how you only want one thing. You're what my mother warned me about."

My brows shot up, and I laughed loudly.

Girls talk and girls lie, and most girls don't know that I am still a virgin—that I don't, necessarily, want what they have.

"Bella seems like a nice girl. Is that why you broke up with her?" She looked away from me again. "She didn't give you what you wanted."

"You don't know what you're talking about." My stomach tied itself in knots.

"Take me home."

I sighed, turning the key in the ignition. "It'll be my pleasure."

After I dropped her off at home, I parked my car in front of Bella's house and stared up at her window. I wanted to throw a rock, get her attention since her light was on, but I couldn't do it—not tonight. So, I waited an hour—until Bella's window darkened—before I went back to the beach for Jake and Angela.

.

.

.

.

.

I've been noticing her again. Ever since that religious Irina chick mentioned it, I see Bella everywhere, just like I used to. My body, my eyes, my brain had become accustomed to ignoring her presence, so it's weird now. She's everywhere—she's all I see.

And I don't like it—_what_ I see.

It's like I was blind—the past month has been a blur.

But Bella . . .

Why hasn't Emmett or Charlie, or even Paul, done…something—anything?

Bella looks tired all the time. Her hair is never done, laying limply on her shoulders. It's been days since I've seen her at the garage.

And it pains me to stay away now. My pride doesn't exist, and I am drawn to her again—like a moth to a flame, her body calls to me.

"Please talk to me," I whispered. She had finally made it to her locker—the spot I've been standing in for close to an hour, cutting class and stalking my ex-girlfriend, my ex-best friend with the deep chocolate eyes and the beautiful face.

Bella wouldn't look at me and tried to pass right by me.

"Please?" I begged.

"You have enough people to talk to." She stopped walking. "I'm not going to the prom with you tonight—I'm sorry. I never got a dress, so if _that's _what you want to know…"

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not going either. I thought you were going with Jimmy . . . right? Did you two break up?" I wondered if maybe that was the reason she looked so horrible. She didn't look this bad when we broke up. My chest ached at that realization.

"Nope." She shook her head. "Where'd you hear that?"

I frowned, looking around for Jimmy. "My mistake—"

"I was never dating Jimmy." She stared up at me. "We're not going to prom either." She tucked her hair behind her ears. "Like I said, I never bought a dress, and I never agreed to go with him. Who told you that I was going with him?" Her brow furrowed. "Bet it was Rosalie." She scowled. "How _is_ Rosalie?"

"Fuck if I know . . ." I chuckled, leaning against her locker. "It's not important where I heard it." I hated myself for believing the lies I know others spread. It's usually me they lie about, though.

She was still staring at me, and she continued to do so for a long time. I didn't understand it, but my eyes never left her. Bella's lips looked so kissable, and it took everything within me to stay where I was. "Bella?" I asked.

She shook her head, swallowing loudly in the crowded high school corridor. "Pick me up tonight at seven."

"What?" I asked as my heart skipped a beat. "You-you want to—"

She shrugged. "If you're not going to prom, and _I'm_ not going to prom . . . I want to hang out with you," she whispered, stepping toward me to rub her hands up my chest.

I smiled so wide and grabbed her hands, holding them to me and feeling so fucking happy. It was an odd feeling—my body suddenly alive with excitement. "This is so great."

She grinned. "Um . . ."

"We'll—we'll go anywhere you want—anywhere."

"That's not necessary," she laughed.

Feeling giddy, I laughed again, which I haven't done in so long. "It's nice out . . . we can have a picnic at First Beach, or we can go to Port Angeles—"

"The cliffs." She cut me off. "I want to go to the cliffs."

"The what?" I acted like I couldn't hear her because Bella isn't the kind of girl you take to the cliffs. She is, however, the kind you cherish—take out on dates and spend money on—lose yourself with. Truth be told, I would go anywhere she wanted me to, as long as she was going to be there, too.

"It's good enough for everyone else." Her lip quivered.

"Hey," I palmed her cheek, "why . . . "

She wouldn't meet my stare. "You never brought me there. You bring everyone else there—"

"That's because—"

"…and I want my turn."

We spoke over each other, and we both wore frowns—she was crying, and I also felt like weeping.

"Your what? You want your turn?" My heart sank back down to my stomach. "You're better than—"

She slapped my chest. "Pick me up at seven." She straightened to her full height, and then turned away from me.

I grabbed her bicep, pulling her into me again and loving how close she was. "Your turn? Am I some carnival ride?"

She pushed me away from her. "You want everyone else, but me—"

"That couldn't be further from the truth," I said. "You . . ." My shoulders dropped.

Bella fluffed her hair and pulled the hem of her white blouse down, letting me see down her shirt a bit. "Maybe I'm not the same girl you once dated."

Quickly, I looked around us to make sure we didn't have an audience. The halls were still a bit crowded, filled with students gathering books from lockers. "W-what's tha-that mean?" Of course, after spending five minutes with Bella, I am back to being the stammering fool I used to be.

She smirked, rising to her toes and holding onto my forearms. "We'll go to the cliffs . . . and we'll have a good time." She licked my earlobe, and I shuddered, suddenly out of breath.

"Bella—" Closing my eyes, my hold on her arms tightened, while my head tilted into hers.

"Seven. You won't be sorry." She pecked my cheek, her face falling as soon as she was out of my grasp. "You want me, right?"

I nodded. "You know I—"

"We'll have fun." She bit her bottom lip and looked as though she might cry again.

"Bella," I felt like I was about to vomit, "we should talk. We can—"

"I don't want to talk," she whispered, her voice breaking. "I can be like other girls. I already am."

"I-I—" There were so many things I wanted to say—so many things I should have said, but words failed me.

"Pick me up," she said.

"At seven," I whispered, watching her walk away from me.

By the time I made it to my car, I didn't know what to make of our "date" tonight, or even of the altercation by her locker. A huge part of me wanted to be happy, but the other part—the other part that was left besides "the happy"—felt like sobbing. Both emotions ran through me quickly.

"Hey, man." Jasper rapidly entered the passenger side, breaking me from my thoughts.

"Hey." I shrugged out of my jacket and threw it into the backseat.

"Hit the gas. I have to pick Alice up—"

I started the car. "You have hours until prom."

"You sure you don't want to go? I bet you could get a date like that." He snapped his fingers. "Call someone, or you can go stag, and pick up a cute baby doll at the dance."

I backed out of the spot and didn't reply.

What did Bella mean when she asked if I wanted her? How could she think otherwise? The question I really wanted the answer to was: why does she suddenly want _me_?

Did the stars finally line up correctly and we could line up—get back on track and be like we used to be? How had she changed? I refused to believe her words—that she was like other girls now. There's no comparison—no other girl is remotely the same as Bella. She's in a class all her own.

" . . . my Mom is letting me use her car tonight. Maybe Alice and I can play some backseat bingo," Jasper laughed. "It is prom night."

"That's nice." I stopped at the light by the garage and saw Jimmy pumping gas. He stared; I stared and kept my hands gripped tightly around the steering wheel. No longer afraid and still harboring hate for the guy, I had the urge to flip him the bird.

"Edward!" Jasper hit my arm. "It's green and stop casting an eyeball at Jim. He'll—"

I chuckled. "Stop being such a pussy. Maybe if you weren't, Alice might—" I caught myself. "I'm—"

"Fuck you." The moment my buddy grew a backbone, it's me he's defending himself from.

"I'm sorry."

"What is with you?" he shouted. "I'm trying to be patient with you, Ed. I was on cloud nine all day, and after spending five minutes with you—"

"I'm sorry," I said, and I didn't say anything for the remainder of the ride. I didn't even tell him about my date with Bella—nothing.

Luckily, I had beaten my mother and Jared home. The house was empty when I took a very hot shower. Sitting in the tub, I let the hot water hit my back while I played the conversation Bella and I'd had over and over in my head. Tonight was monumental. I couldn't fuck it up. Feeling as though this might be my last shot, I vowed to be perfect—be whatever she wanted me to be—so she might take me back.

Everything could go back to the way it was.

There's only a week and a half left of school, but I'll walk and carry her books to each class. I'll keep my hands to myself. We'll dance in my living room in the afternoons, while Jared coaches us and Mom cheers. I'll go back to ducking Emmett every time I see him, and I'll pretend to be a sports fanatic during one of Chief Swan's rants.

While I dried myself off, I wore the biggest smile, and seven o'clock couldn't get here fast enough.

**…o.0…**

Just like I did on our first date, I bought a bouquet of wild flowers and held them tightly as I knocked on Bella's door.

She opened it right away and jumped out. Bella looked gorgeous, wearing a long black skirt and a fitted pink blouse, which made her breasts almost pop out. She had a few buttons undone, and I felt the urge to close them.

"Hey." My eyes fell on her saddle shoes, but most of all, her bobby socks.

"Hi." She grabbed my hand and started to pull me away from the door.

"Wait!" I stopped us. "Shouldn't I—" A gentleman would greet her father or whoever was inside. Instead, Bella hopped up to plant her lips to mine. My body relaxed in that moment—feeling whole and like I might explode all at once. She deepened it fast, molding herself to me, and wrapping her arms around my neck.

Remembering our place on her porch, I pulled away to lean my forehead to hers. There was no way I was letting her go, so if Charlie and Emmett want to kill me, they'd have the perfect opportunity.

"I've been waiting to do that all day," Bella whispered.

"I've—I—" I had been waiting an eternity.

"I forgot how great a kisser you were." Her tongue slipped out to wet my lower lip again—a quick sensual swoop, which almost brought me to my knees.

"I could never forget." I closed my eyes, gently placing my mouth to hers. "You're everything."

She giggled. "Let's get out of here."

"Um . . ." We pulled away from each other; however, I kept hold of her hand. "Where did you want to go?" I asked as we walked down the steps. "Are you hungry?"

She turned to lean her back against my car, pushing her chest out and pulling me to her by my jacket. "We're going to the cliffs." Her hands ran up my torso, around my neck, and then she wove her fingers into my hair.

It felt amazing. "Uh, we-we sh-shoul—"

"Edward?" she asked, and I noticed what I hadn't before. Bella wore lipstick. Her lips were tinted red. Her eyes were outlined in black, making the brown richer—more defined—her eyelashes looked longer, and her cheeks had a rosy red hue. Tonight, Bella was even more beautiful, if that were possible. Taking in the rest of her, I had no words to describe how perfect she was.

"Edward?" she asked again, giggling while her hand traveled south to palm my johnson. "The cliffs?" She rubbed me, and I convulsed—my stomach trembling. "Kiss me."

My body—my lips—knew exactly what to do, even if the real Edward in my brain protested. Something about this was so wrong.

But I kissed her . . .

Pinning her to my car as her hand continued to move, I tangled my hands into her hair, wanting to devour her. Bella pulled away, gasping for air, and I kissed down her neck—needing to mark her as mine, like I used to. "Not here," she said.

Remembering and wondering how I could forget exactly where we were, I let go of her and tried to catch my breath. "Hungry?" I swallowed. "We-we could get shakes?" Reaching around her for the door, she stopped my hand.

"You know where I want to go." Her hand left mine.

I opened the door for her, shaking my head and refusing to look at her—not wanting to get lost again. "We should—we need to talk."

She laughed as she entered the car. "That's not what I had in mind. I've missed you."

My heart rate sped up, and I kneeled in front of her right on the sidewalk, gathering her hands into my own. "Baby, you-you have no idea—no, no idea how much I've missed—"

She looked away from me, out the windshield. "We should get going, before all the good spots are taken."

"Bella." She wasn't being Bella at all. So far, she had acted more like Lauren Mallory, or those other pigs, rather than the Bella Swan I knew.

"Get up, silly." She smiled at me.

I couldn't return the sentiment, but I got off my knees and walked around the car. While I did so, I studied her from the back of the car, watching her slump in the seat while a frown marred her face.

Yet, as soon as I entered the car, she wore a grin again.

We didn't talk at all while we drove to the cliffs. I was on edge the whole time, a nervous mess, as I had no idea what kind of game she was playing now. When I approached her earlier today, I wanted to put the past behind me. Whatever she did, even though she broke my heart into pieces, I wanted us to move on. I needed her, hated how sad and broken she looked, and wanted to put her back together—an action that would complete—fix—me as well.

But my date, who resembled and smelled like Bella, wasn't Bella. She didn't care to speak to me—didn't care to ask about anything, and only seemed to care about fooling around.

Since everyone was at the prom tonight, the cliffs were deserted. We were the only car there, and it was quiet—the sounds of the waves washing up ashore and crickets were the only thing I heard after I cut the engine.

"It's nice out tonight." I was numb again, as I sat back and looked up to the sky. "Are you cold?" I chanced a glance at her.

The stars were out again, and it was kind of cold—a little too cold.

Bella was staring at her hands, but she must have felt my eyes. Her head whipped to me, and that fake smile was back. "You can warm me up." She came to nestle into my side, and I felt at ease again, but still not quite right.

"Why did you want to come here?"

"Can we go in the backseat?" she asked. Bella never gave me a chance to answer. She pulled away to crawl into the back. I turned to watch her slip—fall into the seat and giggle. "Want to join me?"

"Why are you doing this?" I asked.

She grinned, going for the buttons on her shirt. "I'm waiting."

"I want an answer," I said.

"And I don't want to talk." She slowly undid the buttons—opening her blouse and sitting back.

Gritting my teeth, clenching and unclenching my jaw as I pinched my thigh the hardest I could, I tried to stay where I was. I fought for self-control.

"Edward . . ." She sang my name and tossed her shirt at me.

I caught it and threw it back. "Get dressed." I turned around, refusing to look at her, but that's when I felt her. Bella hugged me from behind, while she kissed around my neck, her hands sneaking under my shirt. "Bella . . . st—" I panted.

"Nope." Bella nibbled on my earlobe, before she blew a cool breath into my ear. "I want my turn."

Something snapped within me when she said that, and I turned to her. Something also clicked into place as well. Bella didn't want me the way I did her.

She wanted . . .

What she wanted made my blood turn cold.

She wanted me to treat her like I do other girls.

What she doesn't know could fill a library, and it angered me. "Your turn?" I quirked a brow.

She grinned at me, calling me to her with a forefinger.

I hopped into the backseat quickly. "You want me to make you feel good?" Feeling closed off myself, I tossed her hair away from her neck, ready to give her what she wanted—possibly needed.

Edward Cullen, formerly known as Fuckward, had turned into a novelty—the guy girls use to make their boyfriends jealous, the guy girls only wanted after Bella had me and even when she tossed me aside, the guy—who everyone believes—is only after pussy, a joke, the get-over chump. Even if we had our problems, I always thought Bella was different, always thought she could see the real me, always thought I could be myself with her.

But she didn't want that dork.

"You already do," she whispered, running her hands everywhere, "make me feel good."

I nodded, biting my lower lip as I relaxed back. "Come here."

"Okay." Now her voice was shaky as she climbed into my lap.

My hands roamed down, pushing her skirt up to pool it around her waist, and then they rested on her hips. "This is your show—your ride, whatever." I shrugged, my heart beating so fast while I wondered how far she'd take this charade.

"Kiss me." She touched her nose to mine.

Things happened so fast after that. We kissed, our tongues tangled and fought for control. Her brassiere disappeared, so did my jacket, shirt, and shoes.

The world shifted again—my world—was off its axis, and nothing made sense. I thought of nothing, only felt, and what I felt—no words could describe me, us, in this moment.

"Edward." She writhed below me, and I bucked my hips to meet her warmth. This was so right and so good. Even if I dated all those girls, I never got a damn thing out of it. Beside that disastrous date with Rosalie, I wasn't able to do anything as intimate as this—it was always about the other girl because I couldn't feel anything.

Just being with Bella was spectacular. Being with Bella this way brought everything to surface, but it was still a little wrong—like we were at the wrong place at the wrong time.

"Bella," I sighed, capturing her mouth with mine. "I love you." It fell from my mouth quickly. It pained me while I tried to hold it back, but they were the truest words I had ever spoken.

"Don't say that!" She hit me.

Groaning, I sat back and took her with me. "Let's talk…I can't—if you—" I paused to gather my thoughts. "I can't do this, not if you're not interested in being with me. It hurts," I admitted. "I can't just be your—your . . . what the fuck am I to you?" I palmed my face. Funny how I called Jasper a pussy earlier, and I was ready to cry now.

She pulled my hands away from my face and straddled my lap. "Make love to me." She started kissing along my neck, and the fire ignited again—my body reacting and my brain shutting up, while she rubbed herself onto my rock hard cock. "I want to go all the way—with you—right now." She moaned, taking my hands and placing them on her bare breasts. "Open your eyes, Edward."

I did, to see her tits in my face. "Shit."

"Fuck me, Edward." Those words—those dirty words that girls don't say. They did something to me.

I growled and pinned her down to the seat, pushing myself against her.

"You're huge." She pulled on my hair.

World War III was happening in my brain, everyone against everyone, my body hating my mind, while my mind hated my body. "We-we shouldn't." I kissed along her chest. Then I bit down on her nipple, licking it between my teeth, while my cock kept hitting her pussy.

"Oh . . . Oh my God, Edward. Please—please touch me." She pushed herself up onto me, holding my head so tightly to her breast. "I want it."

"We really shouldn't." I growled out, my hips thrusting on their own. My words didn't match my actions.

And clothes—flimsy cloths were the only things separating us.

"Why do you want everyone else and not me?" Her chest heaved.

I paused, my hands resting on either side of her head, as I took my weight off of her. "I never wanted those other girls." I shook my head, leaning farther away from her. "I never wanted them. I wanted your attention—that was the only way to get it…"

Bella sat up, kissing me deep and bringing my hand down low, which made me fall on top of her. "Touch me." My fingers did touch her, while hers guided them. I felt how warm and wet her underwear was. "Please," she whined.

"You don't love me?" That same hand came up to palm her cheek. My brain was suddenly winning the battle, and I was able to calm myself down a little bit.

Her chest continued to move up and down rapidly, while the heaviness of her next words threatened to break me. "Just—"

I cut her off with my lips, refusing to hear more, refusing to hear more lies. "You're willing to have sex with me…and you don't love me?" I kissed her again, wanting her to feel what I feel. "Angel face, that's not like you—that's not you at all. _This_ isn't you." My eyes raked down her gorgeous form.

She looked away from me. "Just do it. I know you want to."

"Not like this," I said. "No way—not in a car." My head moved, so I could catch her gaze. "Not if you don't love me." My voice was a low raspy whisper.

Her eyes were vacant, and she wouldn't meet my stare.

"Bella, baby, please." I rubbed her cheek with my thumb, urging her to see me.

She swallowed, turning to search my eyes. "I hurt so bad," she whimpered, her face crumbling. "But…I want to give this to you before you go away. And I had—Edward, I had to see you soon."

I shook my head. "I don't want it. I'm sorry, but . . . Bella, I love you and I know—baby, I _know_ you love me, too." I kissed her softly. "I can feel it. Please, just take me back. I'll prove it to you…I don't know what'll happen tomorrow or a year from now, but we can have forever. You just have to want it," I repeated the words I wanted to believe.

Her breaths washed over my cheek as I kissed down her neck and placed my hands over her breasts to cover them. "Please?" I kissed her heart.

She sobbed, turning onto her side as she hugged herself.

Knowing she might be cold, I draped my jacket over her bare torso and held her tightly to stop her from shaking. "I love you," I whispered.

"Oh, Edward." She squirmed to face me, and then embraced me just as close. "I never wanted to be apart from you…I just—you can't stay in this town."

As if I grew a pair of fucking wings, I flew away from her. "What?" I panted, suddenly out of breath and angry.

"As much as I dislike her, you should be with someone like Rosalie, someone like her. Your parents will accept—"

"My parents adore you; they fucking hate Rosalie." I shook my head. "I'll see you every weekend. I'll call every day. You won't get a chance to miss me. And…if you don't want me to go, I'll just stay."

She pushed me even farther away. "See? This is how it gets scary. You start talking like that and—"

I grabbed her biceps. "You're talking about letting me go? You're not even giving me a choice. Bella, you're fucking insane if you don't think you're important." I hugged her to me tightly. "You're the most important. I've been an idiot—you've been an idiot."

She sobbed into my neck. "I didn't think I'd feel this much."

I kissed her hair. "Neither did I."

"I want you…all of you." She pulled away to look at me. "I want—I want to go steady again."

I smiled. "Thank you. It'll be better than last time—I'll be better, a better boyfriend."

She grinned through her tears. "You were wonderful before. I don't want you to change."

My smile probably lit up this dark starry night, I was so happy. We were quiet for a long time after that. She nestled into me, and I played with her hair, while I loved the feeling of her naked chest touching my own. We made our own heat, while my jacket covered the both of us like a blanket.

It was the best time ever—us, just being us. It was odd how everything felt so at ease so quickly, when everything had been falling apart for so long, just hours—minutes—before.

Everything was perfect.

Until . . .

"What's sex like?" she asked.

"I don't know," I said.

"You don't know." She shook her head. "I spoke to Emmett and Jasper. I'm not mad. I know men have needs—"

"Bella, I'm still a virgin." I nuzzled my nose into her hair, loving the floral scent of her shampoo.

"Yeah, okay." She snorted.

"Seriously," I said, exasperated.

"Then what about Lauren, Jessica, Kate, and Vicki? I heard Rosalie lied, but . . . did you sleep with Rosalie, too? Maybe she lied again, just to get back with Emmett."

I shook my head. "Hell, no. Rosalie _is_ a liar…and I barely touched Lauren and Vicki. In fact, I didn't even kiss Kate. We can confront them together." I shrugged. "If you don't believe me."

"What about Jessica?"

I winced. "She didn't touch me. Besides, what happened with Jessica at the movies…and my date with Rosalie, I _only_ kissed girls—I swear to you, I didn't touch Lauren or Vicki, and we weren't together. I was fucked up—up here." I pointed to my head. "But I swear to you, I'm a virgin."

"You're not lying." She gazed into my eyes, and then she started bawling.

"What?" She was scaring the shit out of me right now. "What's wrong now? Everything was just so . . . " My shoulders dropped.

She squeezed me to her. "I did something stupid." She sniffled, still crying softly.

I stiffened, pulling her hair away from her face. "Go on."

"I thought you were having sex with all those girls. I didn't go all the way, like have intercourse, but…Jimmy told me you had sex with Vicki. I was being stupid…one thing led to another…I wanted to forget you, Edward, but I couldn't—it was impossible."

"What happened?"

"He . . . touched me," she whispered, "down there."

"He fingered you?" I winced because of my choice of words. "I mean—"

"Yeah."

"He probably lied to get you to do that," I laughed, rubbing my eyes with my palms. "Look at me," I cupped her face, "did he force you?" I swore I'd kill him with my bare hands.

She shook her head no. "It hurt, like, really bad. But when I asked him to stop, he did. I—I . . . initiated it." Bella looked away from me.

I nodded. "Come on…I'll take you home."

"Can you forgive me?"

I hate that he touched her, but we hadn't been together then.

And in the midnight hours of prom night, under the stars, logic wins. "Of course." I kissed her deeply. "Come on, get dressed."

She wore a hint of a smile. "Are you sure it's all right? You forgive me?"

I nodded. "I do." I pulled my shirt over my head. "You forgive me?" I helped her fasten her bra.

She had her back toward me, but I was able to see her smile. "Yes."

"Did you want to go to prom?" I kissed her bare shoulder. "It's almost over, but we could catch the last dance."

"No. We don't have the correct clothes—"

"You're right," I agreed, helping her get dressed.

Once we were in the front seat, we both wore smiles, and I started the car. Then I turned on the radio, and the song I heard—it was like God, or the disc jockey, knew.

Turning the song up, as loud as it could go, I looked to Bella and took her hand. "Dance with me?"

She looked around us. "Here?"

I turned on my headlights, which illuminated our immediate area. "Yes."

She smiled as she left the car, meeting me by the hood of my car. Pulling her into my arms, I held her tight—not caring about the steps, but moving to the words and melody that played.

_Only you_

_Can make this world seem right_

_Only you_

_Can make the darkness bright_

_Only you and you alone_

_Can thrill me like you do_

_And fill my heart with love for only you_

Nuzzling my nose into her hair, and then skimming it down to her ear, I whispered, "You're my dream come true. My one and only you . . . only you."

Bella giggled, raising her arms to wrap them around my neck. "You make me so happy."

"Only you, Bella." The song, which I always found to be too short, had ended, but we were still dancing. "I made mistakes, but I never stopped. I still lo—"

She had tears in her eyes again, as she covered my mouth with her hand. "Edward . . . I am _so, so_ in love with you."

Swallowing was difficult, as I hugged her the tightest I could and never wanted to let her go.

"I love you, and this—this was better than any prom." She looked around us.

Grinning, I felt like the luckiest bastard in the world, as I dug into my pocket. "Bella," I stepped away to get down onto one knee, "will you?" I held out my class ring.

Tears were still streaming down her cheeks as she nodded her head yes.

"Thanks." I blew out a shaky breath as I placed my class ring onto her thumb—the only finger it won't fall off of. "I'll get it sized—"

Bella got onto her knees, too. "It's perfect . . . the way it is."

I shook my head. "You were so stupid." My verbal filter still needs work.

"I know," she sighed.

"I love you anyway." I nipped her lips.

"You better." She threw herself at me, and I fell back onto the grass, but took her with me.

And, oddly enough, it was like it was before—easy, so easy, as Bella and I just fit.

**Thank you for reading. **

**This is not the end.**

**Please leave me your thoughts. **

**Chapter Songs:**

**Only You by The Platters**

**And**

**Sincerely by The Moonglows**


	17. Commencement

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. Beta'd by HollettLA . . . in RECORD time. Flove her! :)**

**So, so sorry for the wait. Little by little, I've been getting projects finished. I definitely bit off more than I could chew. I need a clone, another Lexi to help me get through all my commitments in a timely manner. Sorry again! And I'd like to thank all of you for not hounding for an update. That can make a person want to scream. LOL. I work full-time, I have many other commitments, and I like to sleep sometimes. So sorry! I had this whole fic written, but I have more story to tell. **

**More to come, but we are close to the end. **

**Thank you so much for your patience, and I hope you enjoy!**

* * *

><p>"<strong>Made in the Shades"<strong>

**Chapter Seventeen: Commencement**

**_The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.__ —Mark Twain_**

**Bella**

**E**dward was smiling so wide, it reached his eyes. His hand rested to my side on a locker. His hair was a mess, and we were about to leave school. He had his shades and his leather jacket on, wearing a white t-shirt and some blue jeans. He looked so amazingly handsome in this moment. All I wanted to do was take his hand and pull him out to his car, so we could neck and fog up the windows.

It was crazy how easy it was for us to pick up right where we left off. This past week has been nothing short of fantastic. Tomorrow will be graduation, and today was our last day of school. Our lockers were empty. Students were running around, acting kooky—anticipating the summer vacation ahead, and we . . .

Edward and I seem to be able to get lost in each other. Five minutes ago, we were laughing about something, but then—as soon as his eyes landed on mine—we kind of became stuck. It was fine by me, as I'd love nothing more than to stare at that man forever—his face being the only thing I see.

"Am I interrupting?" Alice bumped her hip to mine.

Edward shook his head while he cleared his throat, and I stepped back. "Some timing, pipsqueak," he quipped, casting a mean eyeball at her.

Even I could see he was kidding.

"You're cruisin' for it, Cullen." She waved her fist, which made all three of us laugh.

"You bothering my girl, Ed?" Jasper came over to place his arm around Alice. Immediately, her cheeks flushed crimson before she remembered where we were.

"Jazzy." She deftly left the embrace, and then we all wore frowns. Once we get into Edward's car, they'll be all over each other.

Edward being Edward tried to alleviate the awkwardness. "What are we still doing here?" What he said made little sense since the bell rang less than ten minutes ago.

"What the hell _am I_ still doing here?" Jake exclaimed, coming over with Angela under his arm.

Jasper snorted. "Weren't you supposed to graduate last year?"

"Drop dead twice." Jake spat.

"What?" Jasper quirked a brow. "And look like you?" They both guffawed, earning giggles from Alice and Angela, while Edward and I grinned at each other.

But then we all quieted down when Emmett, Paul, Rosalie, and Lauren passed us by with Jimmy and Jessica trailing behind them. Jake and Ang joined them, and Edward was more polite than the rest of us—raising his hand in greeting to my older brother.

Emmett wore a long face, but gave Edward a curt nod. As he did that, I took a good look at Rosalie, who was holding my brother so tight. Her face was red and it looked like she had been crying.

The whole exchange lasted less than a minute, but the silence loomed well after they left out the side exit.

"Well . . ." Jasper looked to us all. "Cheney's parents are out of town—poor guy. They're not even coming to grad tomorrow. Anyway," he put his arm around Alice again, which made her smile this time, "he's having a party—a 'fuck you' to his parents because Europe couldn't wait . . . Are we going?"

"I swore I wouldn't drink anymore—not since prom." Alice shuddered.

She had told me all about dancing her butt off, only to drink a bottle of gin with Jasper and lose her cookies in the backseat of his mom's car. He was a sport and covered for her—since prom is the one night you can stay out 'til morning. He snuck her into his bedroom and took care of her while she was sick for hours. Even though they spent the night together, Jasper was never fresh with her.

Edward said that Jasper wasn't even upset with Alice, only worried about her well-being, which I commend him for. Maybe he didn't score, but what he did meant much more to Alice in the long run.

"Come on . . . no one wants to go?" Jasper frowned, his gaze landing on Edward, who looked to me for approval.

I shrugged my shoulders and grabbed his hand. "I could party," I whispered.

Edward smirked, leaning into me. "_You _could party, huh? Wanna hang from the chandeliers?" He kissed my cheek very loudly, and it made me laugh.

"Let's hang away," I said.

"Hang away!" Jasper shouted. "Now let's get the Forks out of here."

"That was horrible," Alice giggled as they both walked away in an embrace.

Then it was just Edward and me. "Are you sure . . . ? I mean, last party we went to—" He hugged me tight, his hands landing on my butt, what he says is his favorite place to rest his hands.

Since we were still in school, I gathered his hands into my own. "Unless you plan on breaking up with me . . ."

He kissed his class ring, which rested on my thumb. "Not a chance. You're stuck with me, Swan . . . Then, hopefully, someday you'll be a Cullen." He winked, ushering me away from my locker.

I held in my squeal, tightening his green cardigan around myself as we walked to his car.

For June, there was still a slight chill in the air; meanwhile, it had been damn near ninety degrees earlier in the week. It was so hot that Edward, Jared, Tanya, and I hijacked Mrs. Cullen's gardening hose and ran around their front yard. We had a blast, and then Edward and I disappeared—kissing and touching behind his house where no one could see. We thought nobody would see us. Then we caught Jared and Tanya watching from the bushes, so they got the hose again.

"What are you laughing about?" Edward asked, opening the door for me.

"When we got Peanut and Tanya with the hose."

He chuckled, closing my door and walking around the car to enter.

Jasper and Alice didn't waste any time and started making out in the backseat, while Edward and I tried to ignore them. As the days have passed, it's become increasingly easier. When we stopped at the light, I was surprised to see Emmett and Rosalie talking in the office at the garage. She sat in my usual chair, while my brother paced. Once again, their behavior alarmed me. When they break up, they usually don't speak, or they scream at each other—something seemed wrong, like, very wrong. I even felt it in my gut.

"What's going on with them?" Edward noticed it, too, before he drove away.

"I don't know," I whispered, taking hold of his hand.

From there, we dropped Alice off with Jasper at his house, and then we went back to Edward's. Mrs. Cullen—so excited that her oldest baby was graduating tomorrow—ran out to greet us. She assaulted his face with kisses, and it made me laugh.

"Your father is going to be so proud tomorrow," she gushed.

Edward's lips drew a tight-line. He's told me of all the regrets he had. Edward said he not only did me wrong while we were separated; he stopped listening to his parents, staying and going out whenever he pleased, drinking whatever he could get his hands on, and alienating himself from them.

Dr. Cullen told me a few days ago that I make his son a better person. Maybe I didn't respond to Carlisle that afternoon, but I highly disagreed with him. Edward is one of the best people I know. He was heartbroken, just like I was, and he acted out—just like I did, I guess. My problem was that I stopped acting and living all together. I shut down, but maybe Edward had it right: to go out and keep his mind occupied since he couldn't deal with his thoughts when he stopped to think.

"Any wild parties tonight?" Jared wiggled his brows at me.

"Oh, hush, you." Esme playfully, gently, slapped his shoulder. "Let's go inside." She hugged herself. "Where did summer go?" she spoke to herself as she entered the house again.

Edward kept the door open, and when no one was looking, he pinched my ass as I followed in after them. I giggled, yet made no indication that it had occurred.

After settling down, I thought Edward would play some music. He loves it and does so every day, but he didn't. Jared accosted him, needing some girl advice. Edward said he'd be no help. Jared didn't care and wanted privacy, so I left them to it to join Esme in the kitchen. This woman is always in the kitchen if she's not tending to her garden or her family.

Right now, she was preparing chicken thighs on a huge wooden carving board. "Can I help?"

She grinned. "Only if you plan on staying for dinner."

I laughed, falling into a familiar routine, as I tied an apron around my waist. Since we've been back together, I haven't spent any time at all with his mom, even if I ached to. Another sad part about losing Edward was losing the rest of them, too.

"There are some string beans in the fridge . . ."

Nodding, I reached into the refrigerator for the bowl of fresh greens. After setting it down on the smooth counter, I was fast to start snapping the ends off. It was quiet—peaceful—as neither of us necessarily had to speak, although Esme felt differently this afternoon.

"You seem better . . . so does Edward," she hedged, trying to start conversation. "Of course, I knew once the both of you stopped being so blind you would be." She picked up a discarded stem and tossed it at me.

Chuckling, I moved out of the way so it wouldn't hit me. Mrs. Cullen is so cool—carefree when her family isn't around.

"What happened . . . that day you were running home?" she asked, pausing her movements and staring at me head-on.

"Um . . ." I racked my brain, wondering what to say.

"You could have spoken to me." She brought her voice down to a whisper. "I'll remind you again that what we talk about—"

"I made a huge mistake." My low tone matched hers while I stared down at the bowl. "I did something stupid—so stupid."

Cringing internally, I really wanted to tell her what happened, but wondered if she'd think less of me. Edward knows about what happened. He just doesn't know how filthy—wrong—I felt after. Not only was the act heinous . . . Well, the act itself wasn't "horrible". If it had been Edward—oh, how I wished it had been—it wouldn't be a big deal to me.

Thinking about that day and James makes my skin crawl, and it also changed me somehow. James did nothing wrong. I initiated it. Even so, we haven't spoken since the day after when he tried to talk to me about it. I've taken a break from working at the garage—couldn't do it anymore, couldn't face James, and I, for damn sure, didn't want to see Rosalie if I didn't have to. She always hung out while Emmett worked—still does.

Since my brother has been respecting my wishes, my home, and being out in general, has been my respite from Rosalie and James. School couldn't be avoided and today was the last day, which means I could run into the two anywhere, but now I have Edward—who will be my shield.

"O-K." She nodded slowly, gesturing for me to continue.

I blew out a breath. "I . . . I had been friends with this boy since I was—I don't even remember. He's been my brother's friend since we were so little." I shrugged. "He-he liked me, and . . . we-we kissed." I felt my cheeks flush. "I just-I just regretted it right after."

She hummed. "That's hardly something to become hysterical over." She gave me an odd look. "You were so distraught. Edward ran right over to your house. He left so fast, I thought he'd beat you there—"

"He came by to drop off my books," I said.

"He was worried about you, and I could have given him a swift kick—" she slammed her knife down onto the meat, "after he told me what happened. I thought you two would have worked it out that day, but he has a big mouth that never says the right things." She huffed a breath to look up and smile at me, calming herself.

I grinned back. "He was angry." Even I understood, although it took me a while to.

"All you did was kiss this boy . . ." She trailed off, and it wasn't exactly a question or a statement.

"Uh . . ."

"You can tell me. Did he get fresh? Because we can tell your father—"

I looked down. "No, I did. He only did what I asked him to. It was the stupidest thing ever, and after—" I found myself speaking rapidly, but then I remembered myself.

Esme stopped what she was doing to pay very close attention to me. "Go on."

I puffed my cheeks, focusing on my task at hand—snapping the string beans with my hands as I spoke. "After, well, I thought—I thought it made me different. Even if I was disgusted with myself, I thought it made me the kind of girl Edward would want . . . experienced."

She snorted. "And you think my _son_ is 'experienced'?"

I didn't answer that. "I hate high school. Edward and I had our own drama, and everyone lies—lied, which only stirred the pot." My shoulders dropped. "It was horrible."

The only other person beside Edward that I told was Alice. It took me days to tell her, but Alice being Alice was able to find the good in a bad situation. She said—because I bled—Jimmy most likely "popped my cherry", and sex, whenever I have it, won't be too painful. The same thing happened to her cousin when she had some kind of bicycle accident.

"But you're okay?" Esme asked, looking me over with concern etched on her beautiful face.

"Am I interrupting?" Edward raised a brow, grinning from the doorway.

My head whipped to him, and I smiled widely while I answered Mrs. Cullen. "I'm perfect."

"Yes, you are, my dear," Edward said.

Esme and I exchanged a look and then burst into a fit of giggles.

Unfortunately, Dr. Cullen couldn't make it home in time for dinner. Edward wore a long face, but shook it off, and I didn't understand what the big deal was. Knowing he and his father often bump heads, I let it go and figured he'd tell me when he was ready. Carlisle had called early enough, so that Esme held off on cooking the chicken. We waited a while, playing a few card games amongst the four us until Jared complained he was starving.

Mrs. Cullen brought out the TV trays, and we were able to eat while we watched _The Adventures of Rin Tin Tin_ and then _Ozzie and Harriet_.

After Edward and I helped clean up, he cornered me in the hallway off the kitchen.

"Hi." He kissed my cheek.

"Hey." Warily, I hugged him quick before I let him go.

Edward laughed. "You can . . ." He pulled me into him again. "We can be us," he whispered, nuzzling his nose to mine.

"Gotcha!" Jared jumped into the hall.

"See?" I stepped away from him.

Edward narrowed his eyes at his brother and flinched toward him.

"Mom!" Jared hollered, taking off toward the living room again.

"Walk me home?" I scrunched my nose.

Edward nodded, staring down at the floor. "Did you . . . want to stop by Ben's?"

Contemplative, I wore a smirk, wanting to show up with Edward and hang out some more. But then I realized I still wore my school clothes. "Can I go home and change? If we drive, we'll get to my house and then to Ben's quicker."

"Whatever you want." He kissed me rapidly before running away from me.

Trailing behind him, we said goodnight to his mother and then ran out to his car. We couldn't waste any time because I had to be home in two hours. By the time Edward drove me home, I thought I'd ask my father if I could stay out later.

The cruiser was parked in the driveway and so was Emmett's car. Then I was torn, wanting to invite Edward inside, but worrying that Rosalie might be here. Her presence has become something I'm concerned with daily. I had told my brother that I didn't want his girlfriend in our house, and every day I wonder if he's not going to honor my wishes.

"Um . . ." Suddenly my school clothes didn't look so bad. "We can just go . . ."

"What's the matter?" Edward pushed my hair behind my ear.

"Did you want to, to, um, come in?"

His brow furrowed. "Of course. What kind of gentleman would I be, if I didn't greet your father?" He took the keys from the ignition and left the car to come around to my side and open the door. He acted as though nothing was wrong, and that gave me a tiny boost of confidence.

After all, I was just being silly.

I opened the door, and Edward took it from me so I could walk in ahead of him.

"Bells?" I heard my father.

Turning to face him in the living room, I saw Rosalie and Emmett sitting on the couch. "Hey . . . Edward's here." I jerked a thumb, and Edward lifted his hand in greeting.

Dad smiled at him and then at me. "Have a seat, Bella." He gestured to the sofa.

"But . . . I was just coming in to change." I looked to Edward.

"Son," Dad stood up and spoke to Edward, "can you excuse us? I'll have Bella call you when we're through."

"Char—Dad!" I whined through a whisper. "We, we were going to Ben's house for, um . . ."

"Not anymore, you're not." Dad gave me a look.

Edward squeezed my hand. "It's fine."

I looked to my father and Emmett and back to Edward before I pulled him into the foyer. "Wait outside," I said. "I'll be out soon. I don't want to be here while she's here."

Edward shook his head. "I'll go home. We can hang out tomorrow." He smiled and touched my cheek. "We just got back together," he laughed. "Let's give it a few weeks before I piss off your father."

"Bells," Dad called.

My main concern was now so much more than Rosalie. All I could think of were the other girls who would be at Ben's house. "But the party—"

"There's no party without you," Edward whispered. "I'll go home and you call me." He kissed my forehead quickly.

I glanced down at my feet. "Okay." Blowing out a breath, I peeked into the living room again. I saw something I hadn't noticed before. Rosalie was crying and Emmett soothed her by rubbing her back. "Wonder what her problem is . . ."

"Bells, say goodnight," my father nearly shouted.

"I should go." Edward was already making his way out of my house.

"I'll call you." I hopped up to peck his lips. "And you'll be home, right?"

"I'm going straight home-" He stopped talking when my lips touched his again.

"I'll miss you." And I took a chance on kissing him once more.

Edward gently pushed my shoulders back, and his eyes widened.

I giggled. "No one saw."

"I did!" Paul said behind me.

"I love you!" Edward rushed out as he ran from my porch.

I continued to laugh as I closed the door, only to lean back on it. "I love you, too," I sighed, smiling so wide, while I wished he heard me.

"Come have a seat, you two." My father poked his head into the hall, speaking to Paul and me.

I pursed my lips while a dirge played in my head, getting louder with every step, bringing me farther into the living room.

After sitting with a huff, I looked to everyone. "What's so important?" I asked.

My father gave pointed glances to us all, but focused on me last. "Your brother and Rosalie have some news—exciting news." Dad wasn't smiling.

"O-kay." I leaned forward.

"They're going to have a baby—"

"A what?" I shrieked at my father.

"A baby—"

I looked to Rosalie but pointed at my brother. "Is it his?"

"Whoa!" Dad stood up, and Rosalie sobbed harder. "You're being very rude."

"Me?" I pointed to myself.

"It's not like we planned this," Emmett said, pulling Rosalie into his side.

My mind was reeling as I tried to hold my head up with my hands, my elbows resting on my thighs. I thought she was going to college, and then I'd never have to see her bratty, stuck-up face again.

"Now, since Paul is going to Seattle at the end of August, the baby can have his room—"

"She's moving in?" I cut my father off. "What about me? Don't I get a say in anything?"

"Bella—" Emmett started.

"This will be a good thing," Dad said. "There will be another female in the house—"

"More like I'll turn into a housekeeper—a Cinderella." Tears welled up in my eyes as I stood from the couch. My whole life . . . it all flashed in front of me. People don't change overnight. She'll have the baby, and then I'll end up babysitting, cooking, and cleaning a whole lot more. "No!" I screamed. "She's going to take off, just like Mom, and I'll—"

Rosalie reached for my hand, and I pulled away. "It's not about you, Bella. My parents kicked me out."

"And I'm supposed to feel bad for you?" I cried. "YOU!" I wanted to hit her so badly, but Paul put his arm out blocking me. "You went around telling people you had intercourse with MY boyfriend! Was it some game—"

"Enough!" Emmett's hateful glare made me even sadder.

"Bella, please calm down." My father walked over to me. "Have a seat . . ."

"No." I backed away from him. "I'm not—I can't—"

"Bells, it's okay." Paul tried to hug me.

"This is my house . . . I hate her!" I pointed to Rosalie, and I didn't care. I was so angry, so sad, and confused.

Rosalie stood up as well. "You think I'm happy about not going to college, staying in this town?"

"Fuck you!" I shouted, and everyone gasped.

"Isabella Marie." My father raised a brow.

I sniffled, squaring my shoulders and standing taller.

"That is not proper language for a young lady," he chastised. "Now get over here and sit down. We're not finished talking yet."

I shook my head no. "I'm finished."

When I turned from them, my father yelled, "Don't you dare walk out that door."

But I did.

I walked right out.

Down the porch steps.

Down the block.

I actually started running to get away faster.

And I didn't stop until I was at Edward's house.

**Thank you for reading. **

**Please leave me your thoughts. **


	18. Epoch

**Stephenie Meyer owns all things Twilight. No copyright infringement is intended. **

**Beta'd by HollettLA.**

**HUGE thank you to everyone still following. **

**HUGE apology for making you all wait so long for an update *wince* I'm very sorry. **

**This story is coming to a close. **

**THANK YOU for reading and for your patience!**

* * *

><p>"<strong>Made in the Shades"<strong>

**Chapter Eighteen: Epoch**

**A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds - Mark Twain  
><strong>

Life was good.

I had my girl.

I was graduating high school tomorrow.

Not going to Ben's party wasn't a big deal at all. I had the chance to jack my dick while my parents and Peanut watched television in the living room. No hot books were needed. All I thought about was my girlfriend, and since she's my girl again, I didn't feel guilty about it.

Grease stains, bobby socks, my green cardigan, and Bella wearing only those three things while she straddled my lap . . .

All too soon there was a mess on my stomach, and I reached for some tissues.

"Shit," I laughed, still panting as I cleaned myself up.

"Edward!"

I jumped, dropping the tissue. I could have sworn I heard Bella call my name.

"Edward!"

It was coming from outside—my open window.

Quickly, I threw a t-shirt over my head, and it stuck to my stomach. "Fuck." I tripped over my creepers in my haste to get to the window. "Yeah?" I hit my head on the pane. "Fuck me—Hey . . ." I blew out a breath, holding my forehead.

"Hi." Bella looked so small standing on my lawn, and sad—she looked so sad, and she was panting along with me.

"What happened?" I whispered, hoping she heard me.

"Bella?" My mother asked. The porch light was turned on, and Bella was suddenly glowing.

My gorgeous girlfriend looked down, hugging herself. "Mrs. Cullen, I'm sorry to just—"

"Nonsense, dear." My mother came out to usher Bella inside.

I left the window, grabbing the forgotten tissues and wiped myself off. Then I fastened my jeans and ran from my room to meet them in the foyer.

"What happened?" I asked.

Bella was hugging onto my mother, but when she saw me she embraced me instead. I didn't care that my mother was right there and held her tightly. She was shaking, and I grew more concerned. "Baby?" I kissed her hair as she sobbed. "Angel face . . . tell me what's wrong."

"Edward, why don't you two sit in the kitchen? I'll make some tea?" Mom looked uneasy, too.

"Um . . . okay," I agreed, taking Bella into the kitchen.

Nestled at the table, Bella had calmed down. She was no longer crying, and I waited to hear what was plaguing her; however, my father joined us too. My girlfriend was reluctant to speak in front of him. All I could do was rub her back, soothe her, and hope Dad went back to the couch.

"Here you go, honey." Mom placed a mug in front of her, and then took a seat opposite us. "Edward, Carlisle . . . give us a minute."

"Like hell—" I started.

My father whacked me on the back of my head. "Edward Anthony!"

"I'm sorry." I shrugged. "She's—she's my woman. I—" I didn't mean for it to come out quite like that.

"Fair enough," Mom said, staring at me.

It almost felt as though she respected my presence, like I was a man.

"I'll be in the parlor . . ." Dad left us.

While watching him go, I slumped my shoulders—coming down from that masculine high.

"Isabella?" Mom took her hand. "You can talk to me, remember?"

"Stop pressuring her," I whispered. "She'll—she'll talk when she's ready."

"I'm here, you know?" Bella rasped. "You guys . . . you're talking about me like I'm not even here." Her face crumbled, and she cried into her hands. "Everyone does that."

I leaned in to whisper, "I always know when you're around. You can't hide from me—my body knows." Maybe I was talking about my Johnson, but my words were true, and it made Bella crack a smile. "You're so pretty—" My lips barely grazed her cheek.

"Edward!" Mom scolded.

I let go of Bella, staring between her and my mother.

"You're so kooky," my girl giggled.

"Is everything all right?" My mother cut her off. "You're always welcome, but you scared me. It's late."

"I—" Bella deflated a bit. "Um, Rosalie Hale?"

"Oh, Jesus . . . what'd she do?" I asked.

"She's pregnant."

You could have heard a pin drop in my kitchen, it was that quiet. Mom's face remained neutral, yet I'm sure I had paled—shocked. Then I shook it off and a loud guffaw escaped me. I slapped my knee, nearly bent over in hysterics where I sat. "Good for her. Miss Stuck-up is knocked up . . ."

The ladies present didn't share my humor.

"Um . . ." I stopped laughing. "Sorry. Please continue."

Bella shook her head. "I should go—"

"Don't!" I grabbed ahold of her hand quickly. "Not after everything." A part of me felt if she left, she was leaving me, and we had come very far.

Bella swallowed, studying the table. "I couldn't—I couldn't stay there." She looked to my mother. "I'm not horrible, but I dislike her—"

"You're preaching to the choir." I jerked a thumb to Mom.

"Edward." Her tone was stern.

"Admit it. I'll say it. This isn't a Rosalie-friendly spot." I shrugged, looking to my brown eyed beauty. "We all hate her, even this one."

"The Hale girl is in trouble . . ." Mom cleared her throat. "What is she going to do? Last I heard, she was going out East for school?"

"Not anymore," Bella whispered. "She's moving in, the baby will get Paul's room when he leaves . . . Nobody cares about what I want."

"You can live here," I said.

"Edward." Mom pinched me.

"That's crazy," Bella laughed. "I just—"

I looked to my mother. "I'm leaving in two months. She can have my bedroom, or the guest room."

"Let's slow down a bit, shall we?" Mom raised a brow. "We're getting a little ahead of ourselves. The Hales might refuse . . . I doubt they know just yet. I would have heard." She left the table.

"They kicked her out," Bella said.

Mom nodded. "I bet it was a shock . . . they'll come around. I'm going to phone your father to let him know you're here."

"Yes, ma'am." Bella bowed her head.

When my mother walked down the hall, I leaned into her. "Are you okay?"

She cried. "I know I'm going to get stuck with the baby somehow."

Sadly, I knew that, too—felt it in my gut.

"How could you put your mom out like that?" she whispered. "It was weird and—"

"They adore you." I intertwined our fingers, rubbing my thumb along hers while I thought about a few things. "We could always . . . I mean, I could get a job. We could get our own place somewhere. You could still work part-time after school—"

"What about school for you?" she asked.

I shook my head. "Does it matter? Maybe—maybe I could take a year off, and then we both go to U-Dub?"

She rolled her eyes. "Like that's going to happen now?" She started sobbing again.

"It'll happen." My stomach tied in knots as I embraced her. "Whether you go next year, or . . . whenever. You want that? I'm going to make it happen."

"We're kids," she cried.

"So…?" I couldn't see her point. "I could even join the army."

She shook her head no. "I-I wouldn't want you to be away from me. Heaven forbid you were sent overseas—"

I gritted my teeth. "You're only obligated to be home until you graduate, right? We have time to figure something out. I have my wheels, I have you . . ." I smiled, which made her crack a grin. "Everything else . . . we can figure out as we go along."

"You're a dreamer."

"I am," I admitted. "But I have big plans for us."

She pulled her plump bottom lip into her mouth with her teeth, and I bent lower—touching my nose to hers. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I whispered, and we kissed—her lips were soft, her tongue slowly moving inside my mouth.

I groaned, deepening it, and then heard a throat clearing.

We broke apart fast, wiping our mouths.

"Chief Swan is on his way to pick you up."

"No," I said. "I'll take her home—"

"It's late," Dad said, coming out from the dark hallway. "But . . . why don't you both go sit on the porch?" He gave Mom a look.

I felt defeated, as though I had no say in anything. Of course I knew exactly how Bella felt, only she has it worse.

The porch was dimly lit. The street was quiet, and the moon was half-full. I escorted Bella over to the swing and sat next to her. With our short moment of privacy, she leaned into me. No words needed to be exchanged. We just enjoyed each other's embrace, even if I couldn't keep the dirty images at bay. My mind wandered . . . and I hoped everything would work out.

"What if I didn't go to college?"

I didn't know how to reply to that. "I-I only want you happy." I kissed her hair, leaving my arm wrapped around her shoulders.

"I mean . . . I don't know what I mean. Your mom is happy, right?"

I nodded. "I think so."

"What if . . . What if after you graduated, we got married?" She turned to face me.

I searched her eyes, wondering if she was kidding around. "You're still in high school—"

"I meant college, silly." She smiled.

"Definitely." I didn't have to think long at all. "What if we got married when you graduated from Forks?"

She groaned, leaning away. "I'm sorry. It'd be for all the wrong reasons . . . I love you, but I want to get away."

I pulled back, away from her. "I understand."

"Do you, really?" she asked.

"I'll take you away . . . if it'll make you happy."

"What would make you happy?" she whispered.

I opened my mouth to respond, my eyes trailing down her body, but I couldn't say what I wanted to.

"Sex—"

"No, you—just you." I pinched the bridge of my nose. "Just you—my girl."

"Cool," she said. "We have time, though. Nothing needs to be decided tonight. You have a great plan . . . I'd just be holding you back."

"Stop!" I nearly shouted. "Stop with that, okay?"

She put her hands up in surrender just as I heard Charlie's cruiser come to a stop behind me. When I turned, he hadn't even made a move to leave his vehicle.

Taking Bella's hand in mine, I walked her down to the car.

"Chief Swan."

He nodded, giving me half a wave.

"I'll see you tomorrow?" I asked Bella.

She grinned. "Of course. I'll be in the audience—I'll be the loudest while you grab your diploma."

"Thank you." I chuckled.

Charlie watched her get in the car, and then gave me some shifty look. Since I was used to the death glares, I went back into my house, feeling as though a ton of bricks was on my shoulders now.

What the fuck was I going to do?

How could I save Bella from that whole mess?

"Dad?" He was still awake, sitting in his reclining chair.

"No," he said.

"You don't even know—"

"Your mother told me." He continued to read his book. "Your girlfriend isn't moving in."

I nodded.

"You're going to U-Dub—"

"That's for me to decide," I said.

He shook his head. "It's not. You're going—You're going to keep the plan we've had for months. For the past two years, you've had your head in the clouds. I lost all hope that my son would even get into _a_ college, and then—by some miracle—you managed to get into U-Dub, you pulled it off. Now, you want to piss it away, just to stay close to some skirt?"

Anger flared inside of me, and I took a rapid step forward, my jaw and fists clenched.

"What? Edward?" Dad stood from his chair.

Taking a deep breath, I didn't do anything. I stood there like the coward I was. "She's not just some skirt—"

"You're going, and that's that. End of discussion!" he shouted over me, my words.

"How can you—"

"Go to bed, Edward. It's done," he sighed.

I snorted without humor, and I noticed the look my mother gave me—pity. "Right," I said.

After about a minute of just staring at him—the man who never understands, my warden, my asshole of a father, I ran up to my bedroom.

**...o.0...**

The next morning, I slept in. The birds chirped outside, the sun was miraculously shining, and I was graduating from high school.

At that realization, I jumped from bed with a start.

My diploma held my freedom. With it, I could get a job or two. I could get Bella and me the fuck away from everything and everyone without asking my father for a penny.

It was simple, and I couldn't believe how I could have overlooked it, how I could have gotten so upset.

All I needed was my high school diploma.

For luck, I rubbed one out before breakfast, and then once more while I showered.

**…o.0…**

"What if people talk?" Alice Brandon was standing in front of me and Ben Cheney was pretending not to listen to our conversation. We're in line to grab our diplomas, and she's talking about Jasper.

"Who cares?" I shook my head. "If you like him, then go steady with him. You're going to NYU in the fall—you'll be the only two from Forks there. It'll be a fresh start for the both of you."

"I know." She nodded. "Did you hear about Rosalie?"

I turned to look down the line as I nodded my head.

She wasn't here.

"Her parents sent her away," Alice whispered. "Like my cousin Mary—she got pregnant when she was fifteen. They go away for close to a year, and then come back like nothing happened. Or . . . Rosalie once told me about this guy—a doctor in Seattle." She stepped closer. "He makes it disappear somehow, but it costs a lot of money."

"Emmett—"

"He must be devastated." Her eyes widened. "The Hales went to their house late last night, picked her up. I know Bella must be relieved." She let out a snort. "Just saying."

Ironically, I was relieved, too.

Maybe I didn't need to know what my future held at this very second.

An hour later we were announced Forks High School graduates of 1956.

And ten minutes after that—for the first time ever—my father embraced me and told me how proud he was.

Bella kissed me in front of everyone . . . a lip-lock I'd never forget.

She was proud, too, and said she had a gift for me later on.

After those two exchanges, I felt like the king of the world, clutching that diploma.

My parents invited Bella, Emmett, Paul, and Charlie out to dinner with us. I loved it because I was able to be with my girl and our families.

And high school was behind me.

And I still had no concrete plans for the future.

Bella still has another year to go and that makes me sad, but I know Emmett will be with her. He plans to run the garage full-time. He was down during dinner, and no one addressed the elephant in the room. Bella had given my mother a vague rundown of what had happened. Rosalie's parents came to get her, and it was all pretty dramatic—them prying her from Emmett's embrace, Charlie trying to break them apart as well.

Ben, Jake, Peter, and Paul will be at U-Dub with me, along with—I have no idea.

Those are the only people I really talk to.

"Alice agreed to go steady with me!" Jasper jumped up and down. "I told you!" he shouted, which made me laugh. "Defeat is not in my vocabulary! And she's going to be my wife."

I raised my beer to toast him.

"Gimme a sip." Peanut grabbed my longneck, and I gave it up freely, until Mom called us in. We were all back at my house for cake and beer. One-by-one, we trailed into the dining room, and my eyes found her quickly.

"Hey." I wrapped my arms around Bella.

"That cake looks delicious."

"So do you." I kissed her softly on the neck and didn't care who saw. No one said anything, and so I went in to kiss her again.

"Easy," Charlie warned.

And a part of me just wanted to test him.

So, I gently kissed Bella's lips. "I love you."

"Whoa!" Charlie backed away from us.

Bella laughed, pulling me down to kiss her. "I love you, too."

* * *

><p><strong>Thank you for reading.<strong>

**Please leave me your thoughts.**

**Only one more chap, and then the epilogue is left . . .**


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